Long term relationship & 1L Forum

[pianochickahhh]

So my bf and I have been together for 3 years. I'm about to start 1L, he's about to finish up his senior year of college. Having said that, he's my best friend above all. I've told him the horror stories about 1L and law school in general, but he hasn't been scared. My question is whether law students tend to have crazy chemistry and just date each other or is everyone pretty mature and goes there to learn? I'm thinking college and everyone there was to meet other ppl.

[simplytea]

I don't get it. Is your worry that people are going to hit on you too much and you might want to date someone else?

Because if your worry is just that people won't understand you have a SO, that's ridiculous. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years--through all but the first bit of college (i.e. before we met). Just draw boundaries, and if people don't understand don't hang out with them.

If you're not sure you want to stay with your boyfriend, that's a whole other matter entirely. Just stick to your guns, whatever option you want. LOTS of people go to law school married and stick it out.

[ymmv]

So my bf and I have been together for 3 years. I'm about to start 1L, he's about to finish up his senior year of college. Having said that, he's my best friend above all. I've told him the horror stories about 1L and law school in general, but he hasn't been scared. My question is whether law students tend to have crazy chemistry and just date each other or is everyone pretty mature and goes there to learn? I'm thinking college and everyone there was to meet other ppl.

This has been discussed probably 2,000 times on TLS - search query "long term relationship" alone will get you hundreds. I'm of the mindset that if a long-term relationship can survive 1L it's a good sign it can survive anything.

[FSK]

So my bf and I have been together for 3 years. I'm about to start 1L, he's about to finish up his senior year of college. Having said that, he's my best friend above all. I've told him the horror stories about 1L and law school in general, but he hasn't been scared. My question is whether law students tend to have crazy chemistry and just date each other or is everyone pretty mature and goes there to learn? I'm thinking college and everyone there was to meet other ppl.

This has been discussed probably 2,000 times on TLS - search query "long term relationship" alone will get you hundreds. I'm of the mindset that if a long-term relationship can survive 1L it's a good sign it can survive anything.

+1. 1L was my litmus test of "should I move in with this person?" Worked out.

[BigZuck]

If the question is asking what I think it's asking, then the answer is yes.

[baal hadad]

You're gonna break up and start dating a 1L who you will soon grow to hate and then y'all will break up too

[sd5289]

So my bf and I have been together for 3 years. I'm about to start 1L, he's about to finish up his senior year of college. Having said that, he's my best friend above all. I've told him the horror stories about 1L and law school in general, but he hasn't been scared. My question is whether law students tend to have crazy chemistry and just date each other or is everyone pretty mature and goes there to learn? I'm thinking college and everyone there was to meet other ppl.

This has been discussed probably 2,000 times on TLS - search query "long term relationship" alone will get you hundreds. I'm of the mindset that if a long-term relationship can survive 1L it's a good sign it can survive anything.

Close. Mine survived not only her 1L and my 1L, it survived her bar exam. I can tell you the bar was infinitely worse (though we at least know now that it's technically possible to survive my bar exam).

[ymmv]

You're gonna break up and start dating a 1L who you will soon grow to hate and then y'all will break up too

I think this is what OP wanted to hear.

[ronanOgara]

You'll figure out pretty quickly who's there to simply learn, and who is there to learn & party (and yes, partying implies drunk hookups).

[jbagelboy]

yea, people in law school hook up and date, but it's not like college. there are a lot of serious relationships, even marriages, and obviously they are respected.

I agree with others that this seems to be a pretty leading question. It will be a tough year no doubt, but your SO can be a source of support, not just a deadweight or cockblock. If you are solid together and you accept some sacrifices on either side then you'll make it. I did. If you or your partner are unwilling to make any changes or sacrifices, or you are not really sure about each other and still want to "test the waters," then you might not.

There were a few couples who came to law school together and broke up during 1L, but usually there was some underlying problem driving the split - geographic, personality, ect - it wasn't because they wanted to get down with other law students.

[randomstudent]

If anything, the percentage of law school students who date other law school students during law school seems to be relatively low. Most law school students either (1) come to school with a preexisting relationship, (2) date people outside of law school during law school, or (3) don't date at all.

I would definitely echo jbagelboy's observation that "there are a lot of serious relationships, [and] even marriages" in law school, and people almost universally respect these relationships. Of course, some law schools are much frattier than others. At the end of the day, however, law schools are still professional trade schools, and most of law students are there by choice, to learn, and not because their parents made them go.

[lnh819]

jbagelboy made a good post - I echo much of that.

Out of my section, 3 couples formed. Everyone who began the year in a long term relationship remained in it, with two women getting engaged to their long-distance partner. The majority of the section either didn't date (whether by choice or lack of opportunity, I don't know) or dated very casually, to the point of picking up undergrads in bars.

I recognize that is unhelpful anecdotal evidence, but the overall point is that you can have any sort of dating life you want during your law school years, and remaining in an existing relationship is actually one of the more common choices.