Living Away From Spouse During Law School Forum

[Hank William Shatner]

My wife is in dental school and I will be enrolling in law school this fall (2016). Can any of y'all comment on your experiences living away from a spouse during law school? I appreciate your feedback.

[lymenheimer]

http://top-law-schools.com/forums/viewt ... 3&t=170599

[kellyfrost]

How far apart will you be living? 50 miles, 250, a few time zones?

How long have you been married?

What are her thoughts?

What are your thoughts?

How busy is she with dental school?

Is your relationship in a good place currently?

How do both of you feel about this, assuming you have discussed the possibility?

Keep in mind, you DO NOT need to travel long distances to see each other every weekend.

Realistically, you can live away from your spouse during law school and you will both be fine. It doesn't happen that often, but more often than you might think. You will be better to gauge how well your relationship will handle this than anyone else. But my opinion is this is something that is completely doable.

I know of a couple that got married shortly before they began applying to law school. Naturally, they applied to the same law schools; however, she got into a higher ranked school that he was not accepted at. They decided to both attend the same school and she turned down her higher ranking school and offer.

[A. Nony Mouse]

^ this is a good post. I didn't do law school apart from my spouse, but we did long distance when he was in a different grad program. It sucks, but is doable.

Sometimes a longer distance that's a short flight away can be easier than a shorter distance that's a long drive, in that you can work/sleep/chill on a plane - unless you love road trips and planes make you nuts. Again, pretty individual.

[kellyfrost]

^ this is a good post. I didn't do law school apart from my spouse, but we did long distance when he was in a different grad program. It sucks, but is doable.

Sometimes a longer distance that's a short flight away can be easier than a shorter distance that's a long drive, in that you can work/sleep/chill on a plane - unless you love road trips and planes make you nuts. Again, pretty individual.

Thank you! Every once in a blue moon I have a good post to contribute.

[gregfootball2001]

During law school, I lived away from my wife during the week and went home every weekend. It wasn't always easy, but it worked out pretty well - I studied my butt off during the week, and we spent as much time as we could together during the weekends. It was also nice just to get away from law school once a week.

2L and 3L I tried to do externships near her so that I could spend an extra day at the house. It wasn't fun, but with lots of Facetiming (even if I was just studying, it was nice to be able to glance over and see her) we worked it out. Also, I probably worked harder during the week than I would have otherwise. Obviously this wouldn't work if you have to fly every weekend, but if it's merely a really long drive, this is doable.

Good luck!

[you what]

During law school, I lived away from my wife during the week and went home every weekend. It wasn't always easy, but it worked out pretty well - I studied my butt off during the week, and we spent as much time as we could together during the weekends. It was also nice just to get away from law school once a week.

2L and 3L I tried to do externships near her so that I could spend an extra day at the house. It wasn't fun, but with lots of Facetiming (even if I was just studying, it was nice to be able to glance over and see her) we worked it out. Also, I probably worked harder during the week than I would have otherwise. Obviously this wouldn't work if you have to fly every weekend, but if it's merely a really long drive, this is doable.

Good luck!

I'm trying to do this next year away from husband/kid. I'll drive home on weekends, and maybe not have to rent 2L and 3L if I can stack my classes right (I'm only an hour and a half away). Thanks for the tip on externships - I think I could find one near me. We'll be doing a lot of skyping for sure!

[kellyfrost]

During law school, I lived away from my wife during the week and went home every weekend. It wasn't always easy, but it worked out pretty well - I studied my butt off during the week, and we spent as much time as we could together during the weekends. It was also nice just to get away from law school once a week.

2L and 3L I tried to do externships near her so that I could spend an extra day at the house. It wasn't fun, but with lots of Facetiming (even if I was just studying, it was nice to be able to glance over and see her) we worked it out. Also, I probably worked harder during the week than I would have otherwise. Obviously this wouldn't work if you have to fly every weekend, but if it's merely a really long drive, this is doable.

Good luck!

I'm trying to do this next year away from husband/kid. I'll drive home on weekends, and maybe not have to rent 2L and 3L if I can stack my classes right (I'm only an hour and a half away). Thanks for the tip on externships - I think I could find one near me. We'll be doing a lot of skyping for sure!

I think with kids in the equation, this is going to be a hell of a lot harder than just a spouse. Good luck with that.

[zot1]

If you love each other, you will make it work.

We tried to do it during grad school/law school to reduce commute times. We didn't even last a whole semester. But that's just the kind of relationship we have. Some people are more comfortable having more space and whatnot.

[heythatslife]

If you love each other, you will make it work.

Pretty much. Did LDR for 1L, living on the opposite sides of the globe, and long distance marriage for half of 2L. Also I think you need to set clear expectations and have a workable plan (with various fallback options) for getting back together.