Mom diagnosed with cancer 2L year Forum

[Young Marino]

My mother was diagnosed yesterday with cancer. Thankfully, it's in the early stages and looks like it hasn't spread and may be removed surgically but we won't know for sure until tomorrow afternoon. Still, I've been pretty bummed all day and it was hard getting through class today. I am a 2L as of now so I was wondering if anyone has gone through a similar occurrence at some point and how you were able to get through your upperclassmen years while dealing with something so emotionally draining. Thanks.

[haus]

I am sorry to hear the bad news that you mother has received. Hopefully the early detection will help lead to quick and uneventful recovery.

Although not the same, while working on my masters (a part-time program taken while working on a demanding full-time job), I was fortunate enough for my daughter to be born. This gave me the common first time parent experiences, which fortunately went smoothly, although I had my fair share of sleep deprivation and rattled nerves. As my daughter was making in through the first few years of her life, we noticed that some developmental targets were not being hit. With a few semesters left in my degree program my daughter was diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum.

The first year after the diagnosis was a blur. We ran around almost nonstop, trying our best to find the most suitable treatment/therapy options. Both work and school suffered (school more than work), but I managed to keep moving forward. While it sounds simplistic, it largely became an effort of putting one foot in front of another. I would do everything that I could manage, but at times I simply had to let some things go. At first I would beat myself up for not getting things done the way that I wanted them to be, but I eventually figured out that this was counter productive.

Things are better than they were. My daughter has made tremendous gains over the last several years. Now that I am back in school (still working), I try to maintain a reasonable balancing act. And I try to accept that there will times that the pieces do not come together quite as I would like.

[totesTheGoat]

My mother was diagnosed yesterday with cancer. Thankfully, it's in the early stages and looks like it hasn't spread and may be removed surgically but we won't know for sure until tomorrow afternoon. Still, I've been pretty bummed all day and it was hard getting through class today. I am a 2L as of now so I was wondering if anyone has gone through a similar occurrence at some point and how you were able to get through your upperclassmen years while dealing with something so emotionally draining. Thanks.

I'm so sorry to hear that!

Your school likely has resources for just this situation, so don't be afraid to lean on them a little bit. Your guidance counselor and/or a dean should be able to help point you to the right person to talk to.

[A. Nony Mouse]

I'm sorry about your mom, YM. I haven't dealt with this personally but from having students with issues in the past, keep your profs (or bosses) updated if you run into problems getting things done - don't just disappear. It's a lot easier to work out something before things pile up/create problems than after the fact.

And if it looks like you need to, don't hesitate to take leave. I'm sure your school would let you and soldiering through when you don't have to doesn't help anyone.

[CanadianWolf]

If it is Thyroid cancer, then the outlook is excellent if caught early on. If another type & the medical specialist says your mom's cancer can be taken care of by surgery since it was caught in an early stage, then be strong & be thankful.

[TheSpanishMain]

I'm sorry to hear that. My wife had a serious medical emergency my 1L year, so I get how much this blows. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk or whatever

[k5220]

My mom was also diagnosed with cancer (stage 4 breast cancer) right before I started 2L. The think that helped me most was making time for family. I went home a lot. I took time to make regular calls and stayed on the phone too long. I took all of Thanksgiving weekend off, even though it was 8 days before my finals. 2Ls all think they are so busy, but really you have plenty of time to do it all. Don't try to squeeze out the stuff that matters; it will impact your state of mind and end up making you distracted and less able to work and be productive.