Lawyers, are ANY of you happy with your lives? Forum

[Iroh]

It seems a large number of TLSers regret going to law school and becoming a lawyer, whether they are in shitlaw or biglaw, whether they went to a T14 or a TTT, whether they graduated with no debt or $200,000+. I don't know if I've ever seen anyone on TLS say, "Yes, it was absolutely worth it, I love my job, haters gonna hate, etc." Even the people who "won" at the law school/career game seem to be deeply unhappy.

I'm worried that this is going to be me in three years. I was lucky enough to get into many great schools, including one of HYS (no big schollys anywhere so far), but I have visions of myself in the future where I'm slaving away in biglaw, losing my hair, drinking heavily, my wife has left me and I'm seriously contemplating suicide.

To all the working stiffs on TLS: are you happy with your lives? Why, or why not? Any advice for a 0L wondering if he's about to make the biggest mistake of his life?

[kalvano]

Yep. I like my job a lot (the mythical high-paying, small firm unicorn) and I'm glad I went to law school. My pre-law school job was terrible, and this is a hundred times better.

Would I say that if I didn't have a job or was working 250 hours a month for $40K? I doubt it. But I think that's true for everyone.

[McAvoy]

0L, but, if the quality and happiness of your life is predicated on your job, you're probably going to be contemplating suicide a lot. You should find other things to make you happy and fulfilled; jobs are pretty unlikely to do that, generally speaking.

[kaiser]

A few months into biglaw life, and I really enjoy it so far. That is likely because I picked the right firm, and am lucky to work with great people who are respectful, supportive, and understanding. One's experience largely depends on practice group, the people with whom you work, etc.

My girlfriend is also very understanding. She isn't the type to get angry if I have to miss dinner due to a last minute project. We make time on the weekends to unwind and spend time together. Having this base of support at home really makes a ton of difference.

Finally, I always find at least some time for hobbies and recreation. I still manage to hit the gym most days. Sometimes its a tight schedule, but if I stay dedicated, I can make it work. And I typically have time to watch my favorite sports, read some Kindle books, etc.

[Danger Zone]

0L, but, if the quality and happiness of your life is predicated on your job, you're probably going to be contemplating suicide a lot. You should find other things to make you happy and fulfilled; jobs are pretty unlikely to do that, generally speaking.

You will spend about a third of your life (likely more, especially in biglaw) sitting in your office/cubicle. You better be damn sure you're satisfied with what you do for a living.

[A. Nony Mouse]

0L, but, if the quality and happiness of your life is predicated on your job, you're probably going to be contemplating suicide a lot. You should find other things to make you happy and fulfilled; jobs are pretty unlikely to do that, generally speaking.

Conversely, if you absolutely hate your job, it's a good way to be miserable regardless of whatever else is going on in your life.

And I effed up the poll, OP, by hitting the wrong answer (boomer moment on phone), but I'm very happy with my job (even though it frequently terrifies me because I still have no idea what I'm doing). I work for the government, the work is worthwhile to me, I really like the people I work with, I work really reasonable hours, and I know that when I do work late/on the weekends (as I'm sure I will have to at some point), it will be because I'm preparing for a trial/hearing, not because someone higher up the food chain than I decided at 4:30 on a Friday that huge project X needs to get done by 9 am Monday (whether for good or bad reasons). I have debt, but I'm good at ignoring that. Of course, I've only been in this job for 5 months, but right now, it's a good deal.

(I'm also happy in my life, but that is sort of a separate question.)

[Pneumonia]

0L, but, if the quality and happiness of your life is predicated on your job, you're probably going to be contemplating suicide a lot. You should find other things to make you happy and fulfilled; jobs are pretty unlikely to do that, generally speaking.

The question is "are you happy with your life," not "does your job make your life happy." The former could also be read as "does your job prevent you from being happy."

[McAvoy]

You will spend about a third of your life (likely more, especially in biglaw) sitting in your office/cubicle. You better be damn sure you're satisfied with what you do for a living.

Totally agree. Doesn't mean your life's happiness should be predicated on that satisfaction, which I thought was implicit in the question.

Conversely, if you absolutely hate your job, it's a good way to be miserable regardless of whatever else is going on in your life.

Agreed. Not inconsistent with what I said.

[Law Sauce]

Lots of lawyers like their jobs and lots don't, just like any job. A very low percentage of lawyers are on TLS, especially content ones. There is probably somewhat of a correlation between attorney who spend their time on TLS and those that are unhappy with their jobs or something. Busy content lawyers with a job and who are happily starting/raising a family generally don't spend tons of time on TLS.

Not sure if this is happening, but be careful confusing a vocal minority with a larger trend. Especially when you are basing some large life decision in your own life on it (like turning down YHS). I mean take their viewpoint into consideration but it may be that you have to take it with a grain of salt. You don't need me to tell you that.

[Theopliske8711]

Good thread.

[Iroh]

Thanks for all the responses so far. To be clear, I wasn't implying that one's happiness is 100% dependent on job satisfaction. I think it's completely possible to dislike your job and still have a reasonably happy, fulfilling life. My own mother has managed that. My concern is that many people on TLS are deeply unhappy with their jobs, and because of the nature of their job (biglaw and shitlaw, for example) are unable to find the time or energy to pursue other interests that would make them happy. So I suppose the best phrasing of the question, as Pneumonia suggested, is "Does your job prevent you from being happy?" And it is very heartening to see TLSers from different legal fields answering in the negative.

A few months into biglaw life, and I really enjoy it so far. That is likely because I picked the right firm, and am lucky to work with great people who are respectful, supportive, and understanding. One's experience largely depends on practice group, the people with whom you work, etc.

Awesome. Do you have any tips for separating the right firms and practice groups from the wrong ones? Was this something you figured out before you accepted the offer, or was it the luck of the draw?

Yep. I like my job a lot (the mythical high-paying, small firm unicorn) and I'm glad I went to law school. My pre-law school job was terrible, and this is a hundred times better.

Any tips on snagging a job like this? Boutique litigation (not sure if that's what you're doing) would be my dream job, but it seems pretty difficult to get straight out of law school.

[Tuxedo]

My girlfriend is also very understanding. She isn't the type to get angry if I have to miss dinner due to a last minute project. We make time on the weekends to unwind and spend time together. Having this base of support at home really makes a ton of difference.

I am hoping this is something that married life can do for those of us going into law school and choosing firms—that support I think would be pretty essential for me. August 2, people. Mark it. Tuxedo will be wearing a tux.

[kalvano]

Yep. I like my job a lot (the mythical high-paying, small firm unicorn) and I'm glad I went to law school. My pre-law school job was terrible, and this is a hundred times better.

Any tips on snagging a job like this? Boutique litigation (not sure if that's what you're doing) would be my dream job, but it seems pretty difficult to get straight out of law school.

Be in the right place at the right time. I know that's a terrible answer, but it's not an exact science. Meet the right person, have them remember you when a need arises, and make it happen. I wish I could say it's solely because I'm awesome, but that's only part of it. Luck plays a not insignificant factor.

[Teoeo]

I like my job a lot. I am a state lawyer in California.

[Dafaq]

From the point-of-view as someone who spent nearly all summer getting to know attorneys, both in and out of the office, I can say that they were a pretty content group (including the 1st and 2nd years…the ones nailed with last minute after hour projects). My take is….the right money plays a central role in one's positive attitude. There are other factors too (feeling confident about your assignments, working with good people, etc.) but yes, given what I have seen I believe it is more likely to be happy, than not. I am certainly looking forward to September.

Granted there must be lawyers doing the same work for 40K, dealing with tyrants, who are not particularly thrilled.

[nouseforaname123]

My girlfriend is also very understanding. She isn't the type to get angry if I have to miss dinner due to a last minute project. We make time on the weekends to unwind and spend time together. Having this base of support at home really makes a ton of difference.

I am hoping this is something that married life can do for those of us going into law school and choosing firms—that support I think would be pretty essential for me. August 2, people. Mark it. Tuxedo will be wearing a tux.

Yes and no. It helps to have a supportive spouse, but even a slight sense of awareness makes you realize the sacrifices you're family has to make.

On the other hand, my wife and I very much want to avoid having our kids in daycare. This career allows us to afford the luxury of one parent not having to work.

I'm happy because the job lets me take care of my family the way I want to take care of my family. Some of the perks are nice, too.

[twenty 8]

I don’t know many unhappy lawyers….actually I don’t know any. Granted, those encumbered with student debt are a bit discontent. Last week a 3rd year explained that she had to earn $2.8K every month (for the next seven years) to net her $2K monthly payment. That sux.

[worldtraveler]

I don't really like the position I have now, but I think that's more of a temporary discontent. I like the field I'm in and I think as I'm able to move more up the ranks I'll enjoy it much more. My frustrations are more to do with the location of my job and specific work I'm doing now and not really legal work in general.

I'm also just going to respectfully request that 0Ls or people who are commenting on what they think other people feel about their jobs please stop doing that. I get asked by a lot of law students whether I like what I do and I generally tell them yes, because I don't get into very personal discussions about my preferences with people I don't know, and I can't really discuss a lot of the details of my job anyway. You don't really know how someone else feels about their job. It's much more useful if people can focus on their experiences.

[Young Marino]

0L here. Any prosecutors on this thread care to chime in on the things you love/hate about your job?

[garrettnicole92]

0L here.
My uncle is a prosecutor and I worked in the DA's office where I live and most of them are quite happy with their jobs
There's one specific attorney that lectured me on a regular basis about how I shouldn't go to law school, how she loved law school but despised her job, how she wished she would have been a teacher instead, how I was throwing away tons of money to be completely miserable for the rest of my life. Blah blah blah. However, she seemed to be the exception to the rule.

We do work in a pretty rural, small town and the backlog of cases is absolutely insane. On the other hand, I know my uncle does a ton of work from home instead of going into the office, since his house is literally a block from the courthouse and he can just pop over if he needs to for a meeting/whatever. He does a lot of work on the weekends (Sundays mostly), especially when he's getting read for a trial week. Regardless, he seems exceptionally happy with what he's doing, but that might be because of unique circumstances.

[phireblast]

I think the ones who are unhappy linger around and vent on TLS, the happy ones cease to have a reason to come back to TLS.

[rayiner]

My wife and I are both lawyers in big law (though I'm clerking ATM). We love bring lawyers. We have a kid, but we're of the opinion that the best thing we can do for her is to try and leave her a trust fund, so we don't feel bad for ditching her in daycare all day. Since my wife works long hours too, she's quite understanding of mine. We don't have schedule intensive hobbies, so we don't get upset canceling things. I think its key to be flexible and enjoy time off when you have it, instead of being one of those people that needs to have planned vacations or events.

[Danger Zone]

I think the ones who are unhappy linger around and vent on TLS, the happy ones cease to have a reason to come back to TLS.

The poll results say otherwise.

[manillabay]

0L here. A lot of lawyers may very well be happy, but consider this: do they really have time to be unhappy...

[A. Nony Mouse]

I'm going to quote worldtraveler:

I'm also just going to respectfully request that 0Ls or people who are commenting on what they think other people feel about their jobs please stop doing that. I get asked by a lot of law students whether I like what I do and I generally tell them yes, because I don't get into very personal discussions about my preferences with people I don't know, and I can't really discuss a lot of the details of my job anyway. You don't really know how someone else feels about their job. It's much more useful if people can focus on their experiences.