Clerkship Cold Feet Forum

[Anonymous User]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

[Anonymous User]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

I am in a similar position and feel exactly the same way right now.

[Anonymous User]

Perfectly normal, but you’ll be fine. And you’ll meet people besides your coclerks, don’t worry about that. General advice about moving to new cities applies; try to meet some locals, clerks from other judges and their friends, take advantage of living somewhere new for a year, maybe join a church or something where you’ll meet groups of other young people to hang out with.

[Anonymous User]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

I am in a similar position and feel exactly the same way right now.

Thanks. Well at least I'm not alone

Perfectly normal, but you’ll be fine. And you’ll meet people besides your coclerks, don’t worry about that. General advice about moving to new cities applies; try to meet some locals, clerks from other judges and their friends, take advantage of living somewhere new for a year, maybe join a church or something where you’ll meet groups of other young people to hang out with.

I feel this, but there is also something really weird and sad about making local friends on a shortened one-year timeline, but maybe I'm overthinking this.

[Anonymous User]

I feel this, but there is also something really weird and sad about making local friends on a shortened one-year timeline, but maybe I'm overthinking this.

Why weird and sad? It is what it is - you're there for a year. Still no reason you can't meet people and make friends, especially other clerks. Don't get me wrong, I get being anxious about it, but no one's going to think it's weird and sad to reach out and make friends while you're there.

If you can, finding activities is a good way to meet people that's not weird. Sports, art, music, hiking, etc. I took a Spanish class - not for credit or anything, through a local community center - and that was fun. Volunteer somewhere. You should have time to do this kind of stuff (unless your judge is brutal, in which case it's kind of moot).

[Anonymous User]

I feel this, but there is also something really weird and sad about making local friends on a shortened one-year timeline, but maybe I'm overthinking this.

Why weird and sad? It is what it is - you're there for a year. Still no reason you can't meet people and make friends, especially other clerks. Don't get me wrong, I get being anxious about it, but no one's going to think it's weird and sad to reach out and make friends while you're there.

If you can, finding activities is a good way to meet people that's not weird. Sports, art, music, hiking, etc. I took a Spanish class - not for credit or anything, through a local community center - and that was fun. Volunteer somewhere. You should have time to do this kind of stuff (unless your judge is brutal, in which case it's kind of moot).

Definitely not weird and sad to do that. It’s very common for people to live periods of their lives moving from place to place and building (and then, yes, losing) friendships. But you’ll enjoy the time if you accept that friendships need not be lifelong to be enjoyable. In fact, most people quickly make and lose friends when people come and go at work or school. It’s still a good time.

Also, clerking in two new cities will likely move you out of your comfort zone of serendipity relationships into the world of intentional relationships. It’s a great thing because the ability to make friendships from scratch will stay with you for the rest of your life and can help you in tough times.

[Anonymous User]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

I am in a similar position and feel exactly the same way right now.

Thanks. Well at least I'm not alone

Perfectly normal, but you’ll be fine. And you’ll meet people besides your coclerks, don’t worry about that. General advice about moving to new cities applies; try to meet some locals, clerks from other judges and their friends, take advantage of living somewhere new for a year, maybe join a church or something where you’ll meet groups of other young people to hang out with.

I feel this, but there is also something really weird and sad about making local friends on a shortened one-year timeline, but maybe I'm overthinking this.

I feel this a lot too. I have a few really close friends and I’ve known them for awhile. I don’t usually make friends quickly and I can’t see myself getting to know anyone besides my co-clerks really.

[kolio6]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

I am in a similar position and feel exactly the same way right now.

Thanks. Well at least I'm not alone

Perfectly normal, but you’ll be fine. And you’ll meet people besides your coclerks, don’t worry about that. General advice about moving to new cities applies; try to meet some locals, clerks from other judges and their friends, take advantage of living somewhere new for a year, maybe join a church or something where you’ll meet groups of other young people to hang out with.

I feel this, but there is also something really weird and sad about making local friends on a shortened one-year timeline, but maybe I'm overthinking this.

Definitely overthinking this. I'm not against self-reflection, but you can't change anything now—embrace it!

[Anonymous User]

This is sort of a different post then the others on here, but I just graduated law school and am about to clerk for two years in two separate randomish cities (they're still in the 6 figure of populations, but are no DC/LA/NY etc by any means). Anyways, I was initially excited but now I am getting sort of cold feet. Having to live in two different cities back to back feels stressful and it will certainly be lonely knowing no one else besides my fellow clerks.

Obviously, I'm going to end up doing the clerkships and not going to renege as I understand this is a very privileged position to be in, but I just wanted to post here to see if anyone feels similar and/or did feel similar and what ended up happening good or bad.

I feel you. I am now at the end of my 2 years in a random city, and am sad it is over. Clerking is a relatively relaxing gig by our profession's standards, so I had time to hone my craft in a hobby and generally do a lot outside the law. I also ended up meeting friends in my city. Basically, use this time to do something other than watch Netflix and be a big city yuppie and you'll have a blast.

[crazywafflez]

On the moving front- it's good to make those new friends, even for a limited stretch. Whether that's going away from home to attend law school or undergrad, or even just studying abroad. Just because those time periods are finite, doesn't mean you shouldn't be trying to make friends, experience different cultures, try local things, and try and make connections (you never know, you may be back!)

[jotarokujo]

On the moving front- it's good to make those new friends, even for a limited stretch. Whether that's going away from home to attend law school or undergrad, or even just studying abroad. Just because those time periods are finite, doesn't mean you shouldn't be trying to make friends, experience different cultures, try local things, and try and make connections (you never know, you may be back!)

Yep, even though I moved away from where I went to law school and wasn't from there, I made so many friends during that time

[Anonymous User]

You're not alone. I'm also moving to a state where I don't really know anyone, and I'll be in a college town. I'm honestly anxious about the stress of moving by myself back and forth, but I try to frame the move in a good way. At least there'll be a lot of people around my age, and I'll be closer to outdoor spots so I can resume outdoor activities like back in undergrad and hopefully get back into better shape.

Maybe try to think of activities you want to try or haven't done much during law school, or look into taking classes to learn something new once you're settled. I agree that making friendships short term can be kind of sad, but you never know, I've kept in touch with people who I knew were moving away after undergrad and we still host reunions at least once a year, and those trips are fun

[Anonymous User]

I am in an identical spot, and I totally get where you're coming from. I just moved a week ago to a small town and will do the same at the end of this year. There's no way around it being nerve-wracking.

But, as someone else eluded to on this thread, the clerk I was replacing (who was in our exact shoes a year back) was sad to leave. He joined a cross-fit gym and met a lot of nice folks through that. He said it takes some adjustment, naturally, but that you settle into the new lifestyle and before you know it you will feel exponentially more comfortable.

Personally, I'm not a cross-fit guy, but I set a lot of personal "goals" for myself to try and accomplish during these couple years. Get in better shape, reconnect with old friends over the phone, check in on my family more. It won't be the most fun-filled couple of years, certainly, but here's to hoping we both find increasing enjoyment in the little things.

Wishing you all the best!