The value of classmate relationships? Forum

[3|ink]

Zero. Everyone around you is an enemy. Don't even talk to them.

[ClownQuestionBroz]

46 to 34 . . .

Is there a clear majority perception among law student that there is little if no long-term value in classmate relationships? It seems so.

[nucky thompson]

How do you feel about your classmates?

Is it better to keep to yourself or make as many connections as possible?

How much energy should 1Ls, 2Ls & 3Ls be investing into these relationships?

Has a relationship with a classmate provided you with long-term value?

I'd love to hear many perspectives. . . Go!


Relationships are assets in that they can be expected to provide future benefits. Notwithstanding the similarity, relationships should not be treated in the way one would treat an asset, i.e., only investing in friendships if they are likely to have a positive net present value.

Do you enjoy being around other people? Do you enjoy being selfless for those you care about? I derive much more value from my poor, unsuccessful friends than I do from my powerful, successful "friends," notwithstanding the fact that my "friends" afford me professional opportunities.

I think you're fucked either way (keep to yourself / make friends), relative to your professional competition, if you build relationships based on some professional-value-added rubric. Some people you write off as a poor investment will wind up being a governor or senator. Other people that created real relationships with people may have an "in" that you will not have. Plus, human relationships afford benefits that cannot be quantified - these benefits you will miss out on.

Not only will you miss out on some "value" due to inherent uncertainty in valuation, the people you do forge "relationships" with will know that the relationship is phony. If you're in a position to help this phony friend, your phony friend will certainly rely on their "friendship" with you to hopefully gain an advantage.

But, how likely is it that these phony "friends" would / will reciprocate? Given the phony nature of your "friendship," I think it is unlikely that you will ever benefit significantly from the endeavor - if that person is ever in a position to help you, it is likely the will also be able to help someone else. You may be higher on their totem pole than a stranger, but the person's real friends will be higher than you as will other "phony" friends have more to offer in return.

So - if you treat friendships as a business would treat an asset, do not invest any energy in these relationships because phony relationships have very weak returns; no matter how successful / prestigious the counter-party.

[Nightrunner]

So long as "we had sex a few times" is the foundation of a long-term professional relationship, then law school is a goddamn gold mine.

[BK88]

Be cool but don't be weird. Don't be that guy trying to socialize just to network, people can smell that on you and it gives off a bad vibe.