Transfer PS Critique Forum

[Peeblepop]

. Thanks for the help. I think I made solid and necessary improvements as a result.

[Peeblepop]

Be brutal, please.

[kaiser]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer to that school in particular? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

[Peeblepop]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

Just seems like an obvious answer. I want to go to [T5 school] because, empirically, they put out more professors. They know that. I don't have real regional needs to go to most of them. How much should I put into telling Yale I want to go to them because they are the best school ever?

[kaiser]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

Just seems like an obvious answer. I want to go to [T5 school] because, empirically, they put out more professors. They know that. I don't have real regional needs to go to most of them.

They will realize just how interchangeable they are to you based on a PS like this. All of the top schools put out a good number of professors. So if Columbia reads this, why would an adcom at Columbia think you actually want to go there over, say, Harvard? What have you done to indicate a sincere interest in any particular school? Unfortunately, these schools like when you kiss their boots, and thats what you need to do.

[Peeblepop]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

Just seems like an obvious answer. I want to go to [T5 school] because, empirically, they put out more professors. They know that. I don't have real regional needs to go to most of them.

They will realize just how interchangeable they are to you based on a PS like this. All of the top schools put out a good number of professors. So if Columbia reads this, why would an adcom at Columbia think you actually want to go there over, say, Harvard? What have you done to indicate a sincere interest in any particular school? Unfortunately, these schools like when you kiss their boots, and thats what you need to do.

No one at Columbia is ever going to believe anyone looking to become a prof wants to go there instead of Harvard or Yale, no matter what they say. Unless I have reasons like my finace moving there for her dying grandmother, is there a way I could convince them that they're my #1 choice?

[kaiser]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

Just seems like an obvious answer. I want to go to [T5 school] because, empirically, they put out more professors. They know that. I don't have real regional needs to go to most of them.

They will realize just how interchangeable they are to you based on a PS like this. All of the top schools put out a good number of professors. So if Columbia reads this, why would an adcom at Columbia think you actually want to go there over, say, Harvard? What have you done to indicate a sincere interest in any particular school? Unfortunately, these schools like when you kiss their boots, and thats what you need to do.

No one at Columbia is ever going to believe anyone looking to become a prof wants to go there instead of Harvard or Yale, no matter what I say. Unless I have reasons like my finace moving there for her dying grandmother, is there a way I could convince them that they're my #1 choice?

Theres lots of additional things you can focus on. What type of law are you interested in? Perhaps they have some unique programs, course offerings or clinics? How about their pro bono or service programs? Perhaps that is something you are looking to become active in? Or maybe you could talk about access to a particular legal market. I wouldn't just use a generic reason without something a bit more tailored.

[Peeblepop]

I don't know why you included so much fluff when the focus of transfer PS should be direct and concise. You need to answer the one main question: Why do you want to transfer? You barely answered that question if at all, and it took you multiple paragraphs to get there. Your PS reads like the PS one would submit the first time around in the application cycle. A transfer PS is an entirely different beast. You should alter your approach accordingly.

They will realize just how interchangeable they are to you based on a PS like this. All of the top schools put out a good number of professors. So if Columbia reads this, why would an adcom at Columbia think you actually want to go there over, say, Harvard? What have you done to indicate a sincere interest in any particular school? Unfortunately, these schools like when you kiss their boots, and thats what you need to do.

No one at Columbia is ever going to believe anyone looking to become a prof wants to go there instead of Harvard or Yale, no matter what I say. Unless I have reasons like my finace moving there for her dying grandmother, is there a way I could convince them that they're my #1 choice?

Theres lots of additional things you can focus on. What type of law are you interested in? Perhaps they have some unique programs, course offerings or clinics? How about their pro bono or service programs? Perhaps that is something you are looking to become active in? Or maybe you could talk about access to a particular legal market. I wouldn't just use a generic reason without something a bit more tailored.

I really feel like, having established I want to be a prof, that should be it. They get it. They know why I'm transferring. It sounds like I might be way wrong there. Anyone else want to weight in?

[maf70]

...

[Peeblepop]

I agree. Nothing about this says transfer personal statement. Have you done nothing during your 1L that might apply to your goals?

I studied and got good grades...

[kritarch]

This is quite possibly the best Personal Statement I've ever read. Really good work!

[Peeblepop]

This is quite possibly the best Personal Statement I've ever read. Really good work!

That is... not in line with the comments I've gotten so far. Thank you. Any comment on what others have had to say?

[hadokenstyle]

I know you took your PS down, but I would honestly take the advice you get here with a grain of salt and trust your own intuitions before dramatically reworking whatever it is you had. Spending a lot of time addressing why you want to transfer is one of many strategies. But you can be sure that everybody will be doing it, and the adcomms will be reading a few hundred applications that all pretty much say the same thing.

I mean, most people won't have an earth-shattering personal reason to transfer, and if so, you will still need the grades and school rank. That's what matters. The PS may have an effect but if I had to guess, I would probably call in the margins of 2% on a scale dominated 98% by the first two factors.

I would be surprised if it even gets looked at, and the $70+ fee goes to your numbers and school being plugged into and excel formula and it spitting out an accept/admit.

But then again, what do I know, I'm not an adcomm, so take what I have to say with a grain of salt.