Am I just being dumb in how I say no to work? Forum

[Anonymous User]

I feel like I shouldn’t be asking this question this far in my career but...

Historically I haven’t been that great at saying no to work. Recently I’ve decided to say no to more assignments that I either don’t want, people I don’t want to work for, or if I’m just too busy.

But unless I’m missing something, the “hey you have some time to help out on this new deal...” question is total bullshit. It’s not a real question - you’re gonna be on the deal. I’ve now been at two firms and when I try to push back and say I don’t really have the bandwidth and have a lot of matters I’m working on, I basically get railroaded and put on the deal anyway. Some pricks even give me a lecture of how sometimes you’re just slammed, tough titties.

What’s the most effective way to say no? Is no a complete sentence?

[esther0123]

I feel like I shouldn’t be asking this question this far in my career but...

Historically I haven’t been that great at saying no to work. Recently I’ve decided to say no to more assignments that I either don’t want, people I don’t want to work for, or if I’m just too busy.

But unless I’m missing something, the “hey you have some time to help out on this new deal...” question is total bullshit. It’s not a real question - you’re gonna be on the deal. I’ve now been at two firms and when I try to push back and say I don’t really have the bandwidth and have a lot of matters I’m working on, I basically get railroaded and put on the deal anyway. Some pricks even give me a lecture of how sometimes you’re just slammed, tough titties.

What’s the most effective way to say no? Is no a complete sentence?

Not sure if this is effective but I respond something like "Sure, but [name drop a partner/someone more senior (if true, hopefully yes)] wants XYZ done first so would getting to it by [some date] work for you? Let me know if you want me to prioritize differently". Then at least I'm kind of saying yes, and if that later date doesn't work for them, then they'll find someone else. And by namedropping a partner, the associate knows they'll have to deal with the partner if they want my bandwidth.

[Wild Card]

You will get yourself fired if you do this directly to senior associates. They will rat on you and fuck you over. Do as the poster above suggested, and reach out to partners or other seniors, with the "asker" CCed. Let them settle it for you.

[Lancair]

You will get yourself fired if you do this directly to senior associates. They will rat on you and fuck you over. Do as the poster above suggested, and reach out to partners or other seniors, with the "asker" CCed. Let them settle it for you.

Correct. You should never say “no” to work, but do this. 9/10 they will go find an easier yes man rather than arguing with another partner about whether you have capacity or not. Strategically saying no is the only way to stay sane in this job.

[Anonymous User]

OP here. Thanks for the helpful suggestions. I think that works when I’m very busy, less so when I just don’t want to do a crappy deal.

For what it’s worth, I’m just trying to hang on six more months and get out of biglaw permanently. So I do want to start trying to coast, hence saying no.

[cfcm]

You will get yourself fired if you do this directly to senior associates. They will rat on you and fuck you over. Do as the poster above suggested, and reach out to partners or other seniors, with the "asker" CCed. Let them settle it for you.

This is nuclear option type behavior. Definitely not something I’d recommend as a first move.

[The Lsat Airbender]

I think that works when I’m very busy, less so when I just don’t want to do a crappy deal.

People can smell this once they've been in biglaw a few years, and that's why you're getting the "tough titties" response. Someone's got to do the crappy deal and the only way to protect yourself is to load up on work you actually like.

You will get yourself fired if you do this directly to senior associates. They will rat on you and fuck you over. Do as the poster above suggested, and reach out to partners or other seniors, with the "asker" CCed. Let them settle it for you.

This is nuclear option type behavior. Definitely not something I’d recommend as a first move.

Agreed.

[cavalier1138]

I think the OP was broad, and people responded to two different types of saying "no." There's a wide gulf between saying no to work because you're actually fully loaded with projects and saying no because you don't want that project/partner.

If you're busy, the first move should be to tell them that you're busy. If they push, name drop the specific project(s) taking up your time. I agree that actually CC'ing partners on email chains should be a last resort, and I'd be surprised if you got intense pushback when you're actually busy.

But as far as I know, the only way to avoid taking on projects you just don't want to work on is to actually have other work. You can't just say "No, I don't feel like it."

[notinbiglaw]

"I'm expecting a lot of work from xxx anytime" usually worked for me. A variant is "let me ask xxxx about how quickly he wants whatever he needs whatever."

Honestly, if you really have nothing to do and aren't expecting anything, you do it even if it's an administrative job like photocopying/binding dumb powerpoints.

If you're busy at all with something on your plate, there really isn't a problem to saying no. Just make sure you aren't cutting off too many sources of work.

[QContinuum]

"I'm expecting a lot of work from xxx anytime" usually worked for me. A variant is "let me ask xxxx about how quickly he wants whatever he needs whatever."

Honestly, if you really have nothing to do and aren't expecting anything, you do it even if it's an administrative job like photocopying/binding dumb powerpoints.

If you're busy at all with something on your plate, there really isn't a problem to saying no. Just make sure you aren't cutting off too many sources of work.

100% cosign the above.