question on SA events / drinking Forum

[Anonymous User]

As someone who really never drinks (simply just never want to; nothing really against it), will I stick out at SA events next summer? I know a lot of them have drinking. I hate to be the guy holding water when everyone else is having a good time and then being noticed ...

[ArtistOfManliness]

Drink soda water, or coke, and no one will even notice.

[sublime]

Yea. Just get whatever you want. Nobody will notice or care.

[Sprout]

As someone who really never drinks (simply just never want to; nothing really against it), will I stick out at SA events next summer? I know a lot of them have drinking. I hate to be the guy holding water when everyone else is having a good time and then being noticed ...

get a soda water with lime which looks like a vodka soda, or a cranberry juice and soda with lime, or just a coke/diet coke. no one will care. trust - if you don't even enjoy drinking, don't become a part of the very large percentage of lawyers that drink too much. if your lifestyle choices work for you, stick with it. no one will know the difference. seriously. PM me for tips if you want, I get the concern, but I swear, you're fine.

[rpupkin]

Agree with the other posters. OP, there are plenty of non-drinkers at every firm. You'll find Mormons, AA members, and people who simply don't like to drink. I understand why you're anxious about this, but it won't be an issue for you.

[masque du pantsu]

Yes, just go to the event, do your thing, have a good time and don't even worry about it. And if your firm is the type that tends to do after-parties and after-after-parties (mine is), you can do the same thing at those, or skip them if you prefer--by that point the crowd has usually whittled significantly.

[Boltsfan]

My SA firm was very work hard, play hard. We drank so much I had to take a month to dry out on the other side. We also had mormons/muslims/other non-drinkers that came to all of our social functions and got along fine. No one cares if you drink or not. And honestly, it can be pretty helpful to have someone who is sober enough to give the uber driver directions.

[Anonymous User]

I'm a former drug addict who is sober these days. Just politely decline, and try and have a good a time as possible.

[Anonymous User]

Didn't really drink at most of my SA events and it was fine, stuck with coke or water. Most of the time no one really says anything or notices especially if it is at a big event, more difficult at small group lunches and dinners. Sometimes I might get a one comment tease or joke about it, but it was light-hearted and not meant to be mean and this was rare. There were also other summers that didn't drink as well. It's really NBD.

[Anonymous User]

OP here. Yeah, I imagine it's much more of a big deal in my own head than it is to anyone else. I just hate that feeling when someone says ''lets all do shots!'' and then I say, ''haha, no thanks.." and then when people say "come on, just one!" I continue to deny. W/e though, thanks for the input everyone

[Sprout]

OP here. Yeah, I imagine it's much more of a big deal in my own head than it is to anyone else. I just hate that feeling when someone says ''lets all do shots!'' and then I say, ''haha, no thanks.." and then when people say "come on, just one!" I continue to deny. W/e though, thanks for the input everyone

you can always go with the "Im on antibiotics" or something thing but that's a one time solution. There is actually a thing where people can be allergic to alcohol. If you don't want to get into it just tell people that. Imo, the firmer though the better at the beginning. If you don't drink you don't drink, no big deal. Just go with whatever you're comfortable with but I feel you on bolded and it's true. People won't care, it's just built up in your head as an anxiety thing. Try not to worry about it.

edit: or just say you don't drink. there's nothing to be embarrassed about. in fact I find that really respectable and attractive in people. alcohol is poison and it ruins a lot of lives. good for you for avoiding it.

[rpupkin]

OP here. Yeah, I imagine it's much more of a big deal in my own head than it is to anyone else. I just hate that feeling when someone says ''lets all do shots!'' and then I say, ''haha, no thanks.." and then when people say "come on, just one!" I continue to deny. W/e though, thanks for the input everyone

you can always go with the "Im on antibiotics" or something thing but that's a one time solution.

That's a terrible idea. Don't lie, OP. The only way this situation becomes weird for you is if you make it weird. Lying about antibiotics or allergies or whatever counts as making it weird.

[Sprout]

OP here. Yeah, I imagine it's much more of a big deal in my own head than it is to anyone else. I just hate that feeling when someone says ''lets all do shots!'' and then I say, ''haha, no thanks.." and then when people say "come on, just one!" I continue to deny. W/e though, thanks for the input everyone

you can always go with the "Im on antibiotics" or something thing but that's a one time solution.

That's a terrible idea. Don't lie, OP. The only way this situation becomes weird for you is if you make it weird. Lying about antibiotics or allergies or whatever counts as making it weird.

Yeah that's actually much better advice. Go with that, OP.

[CaptainJapan]

If it's not for moral/religious/recovery reasons...why not just nurse a beer? I'm not a big drinker, but refusing a drop of alcohol for no reason, if it's not weird, it's potentially a conversation-stopper. Maybe I'm an outlier here but it seems like nobody expects people to drink so much for the sake of being intoxicated...it's just a social norm. Obviously not a big deal, and not something I would worry about...but I don't know why you wouldn't just carry a drink around. 0% weird to say "I don't drink much" and about 7% weird (to me) to say "I absolutely will not drink and for no real reason"

[zhenders]

Anyone who is giving the advice of lying has never been an SA and shouldn't be commenting. Just don't drink. No one will care; this is literally the biggest non-issue in the universe. You're 100% fine.

[LaLiLuLeLo]

We still make fun of the guy who used the antibiotics excuse. So don't do that.

[rpupkin]

0% weird to say "I don't drink much" and about 7% weird (to me) to say "I absolutely will not drink and for no real reason"

Have you ever worked in a professional setting? At every office I've worked at, there have been at least a couple of people who didn't drink. Apparently, you think it's appropriate to demand that these people give you a reason for not drinking. That's a 100% weird thing to do.

OP, there is a lesson here: it's quite possible there will be a couple of aspie bros like CaptainJapan in your summer class who will insist on knowing why you don't drink. If that happens, just say you don't like to drink. Trust me, their social ineptitude will be a lot more conspicuous than your lack of drinking.

[A. Nony Mouse]

Yeah, being weirded out by people who don't drink is much weirder than just not drinking.

[Anonymous User]

0% weird to say "I don't drink much" and about 7% weird (to me) to say "I absolutely will not drink and for no real reason"

Have you ever worked in a professional setting? At every office I've worked at, there have been at least a couple of people who didn't drink. Apparently, you think it's appropriate to demand that these people give you a reason for not drinking. That's a 100% weird thing to do.

OP, there is a lesson here: it's quite possible there will be a couple of aspie bros like CaptainJapan in your summer class who will insist on knowing why you don't drink. If that happens, just say you don't like to drink. Trust me, their social ineptitude will be a lot more conspicuous than your lack of drinking.

Woah looks like I'm on this guy's turf now...I'd better tread lightly over here

OP don't worry about it. Your decision not to drink isn't going to negatively affect you. If you want to listen to an aspie bro who also doesn't really drink and isn't an online forum superstar, it's a pretty normal thing to do to just walk around with a beer. Or draw arbitrary rules for yourself and attach some moral victory to carrying a Diet Pepsi around. It doesn't really matter.

[A. Nony Mouse]

But the OP never claimed there was some kind of moral victory in not drinking. You sound kind of defensive, to be honest.

[lurklaw]

OP, I suggest that you lighten up a bit and start experimenting with all of the gateway drugs.

[CaptainJapan]

But the OP never claimed there was some kind of moral victory in not drinking. You sound kind of defensive, to be honest.

What makes you say that? All the personal insults I started with? The assumed infallible sense of the one correct way to behave in a social setting?

It's dictionary definition "unusual" to completely abstain from alcohol if you're outside the religion/recovery/health reasons. Never said it reflects on anyone's character...only that it's a tiny bit strange. That radical opinion upsets some people, and I can only imagine why...

[rpupkin]

But the OP never claimed there was some kind of moral victory in not drinking. You sound kind of defensive, to be honest.

What makes you say that? All the personal insults I started with? The assumed infallible sense of the one correct way to behave in a social setting?

It's dictionary definition "unusual" to completely abstain from alcohol if you're outside the religion/recovery/health reasons.

You continue to miss this point. How is anyone going to know the OP's reasons for not drinking alcohol? Please describe the circumstance in which the OP will be expected to voice a religious or health reason for not drinking.

Never said it reflects on anyone's character...only that it's a tiny bit strange. That radical opinion upsets some people, and I can only imagine why...

It took you all of one sentence to shift from "dictionary definition of 'unusual'" to "a tiny bit strange." You can't even keep track of your own bullshit. As for your closing innuendo, my reaction to you has nothing to do with my own relationship with alcohol. I drink often. I do, however, work with people who don't drink in social settings, and no one asks them why they don't drink. If you--as a summer associate--started asking these folks why they don't drink alcohol, you'd probably be no-offered.

[CaptainJapan]

But the OP never claimed there was some kind of moral victory in not drinking. You sound kind of defensive, to be honest.

What makes you say that? All the personal insults I started with? The assumed infallible sense of the one correct way to behave in a social setting?

It's dictionary definition "unusual" to completely abstain from alcohol if you're outside the religion/recovery/health reasons.

You continue to miss this point. How is anyone going to know the OP's reasons for not drinking alcohol? Please describe the circumstance in which the OP will be expected to voice a religious or health reason for not drinking.

Never said it reflects on anyone's character...only that it's a tiny bit strange. That radical opinion upsets some people, and I can only imagine why...

It took you all of one sentence to shift from "dictionary definition of 'unusual'" to "a tiny bit strange." You can't even keep track of your own bullshit. As for your closing innuendo, my reaction to you has nothing to do with my own relationship with alcohol. I drink often. I do, however, work with people who don't drink in social settings, and no one asks them why they don't drink. If you--as a summer associate--started asking these folks why they don't drink alcohol, you'd probably be no-offered.

You sound fun dude

[lavarman84]

As someone who really never drinks (simply just never want to; nothing really against it), will I stick out at SA events next summer? I know a lot of them have drinking. I hate to be the guy holding water when everyone else is having a good time and then being noticed ...

My recommendation: Grab a beer and drink it slowly throughout the night. It seems like you have no true issue with drinking.