Did I just blow my chances with a specific law firm for 3L mass mailing by going to office hours? Forum

[apa80]

you won't tell us what the excuse is?
And also, are you just not planning on having anything for the summer? Because when you say you couldn't take your SA in non-NYC firm but then turn around and accept a position with wherever you end up... how do you reconcile that with your excuse*?

I can't say what the excuse will be because I haven't decided on one yet. And I don't want anyone here to get cute and alert the partner they think it is to "be on the lookout for this particular excuse."
But I'll tell you this: I'll tailor the excuse to the circumstances, not choose jobs only if they're consistent with a pre-formulated excuse.

If you do get caught, it could really blow up in a big way. It's the fact that you don't have the job you say you do

It's the fact that I don't have the job I allegedly said I had *10 months ago*. By that time..."I don't recall ever saying anything about FirmX." But all you've done is that you've just told me again that it's a lie. Not how option1 would blow up.

I don't know exactly how it's going to blow up, but if you run around town telling a bunch of lies, there's a non-negligible chance that you'll get caught in one of them. All I am saying is that it will be a really shitty situation if you do

Also, so you're going to come out and tell him in 10 months that you backed out of your job with firmX because of [insert "truth"], and then when that goes downhill you're going to say, "I don't recall ever saying anything about firmX"?

[fats provolone]

this is so much effort for a job OP will never get

[Anonymous User]

???

[Anonymous User]

this is so much effort for a job OP will never get

It wouldn't have been that much effort. But then someone got cute and "kinda wants to know who I am IRL, but is 'on the fence.'" They can do that if they want, but it's going to have collateral consequences (even assuming he gets it right, which, lol good luck with that). Esp if it puts me in a "nothing to lose" situation, since at that point, well, what do I have to lose? Same goes with "don't even bother to apply."

[edwardt1988]

The funniest part about all of this is that OP is going to send out an email with a bunch of names if someone tries to out him to the professor. And the professor is supposed to take that e-mail seriously when OP outlined his clever plan in this thread.

OP is the type of person who commits a crime and posts about it on FB and wonders how he got caught.

OP, you're smarter than all of us. There is absolutely nothing wrong that could go wrong. Sarcasm? IDK. Could be sarcasm here and not IRL, or vice-versa

[Anonymous User]

The funniest part about all of this is that OP is going to send out an email with a bunch of names if someone tries to out him to the professor. And the professor is supposed to take that e-mail seriously when OP outlined his clever plan in this thread.

Did *I* outline the entire plan? Or did the person who outted me come up with this plan? Regardless of whether I'm the first or 2nd to act, if the goal is to mix my name in a hat with 15 others, this is how the person who outs me would plan it too.

Basically, the first person to email the prof, how would the prof know if he only meant to out me, 1 specific individual, or he wants to out 20 people?
Unless he emails the prof non-anonymously and attaches his name to something as petty as outting someone whose identity they're not even sure of.

[anyriotgirl]

Mods why don't you just out and ban thanks

Which Term of Service have I violated to warrant outting and a ban, instead of the 0Ls and anon abusers who actually broke forum rules?
If I'm outted, my RICH posting history will be revealed. I don't think it'll be of any use to someone trying to figure out who I am IRL, but the whole point of outting me here is so that someone IRL can try to out me.
Then, fair game, nothing to lose, etc.

oh my god you're james bungles aren't you

[apa80]

Mods why don't you just out and ban thanks

Which Term of Service have I violated to warrant outting and a ban, instead of the 0Ls and anon abusers who actually broke forum rules?
If I'm outted, my RICH posting history will be revealed. I don't think it'll be of any use to someone trying to figure out who I am IRL, but the whole point of outting me here is so that someone IRL can try to out me.
Then, fair game, nothing to lose, etc.

oh my god you're james bungles aren't you

Shots fired

[BigZuck]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

[anyriotgirl]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

my revised theory is that someone else came along and ran with the original anon's scenario and has got us all

[fats provolone]

Mods why don't you just out and ban thanks

Which Term of Service have I violated to warrant outting and a ban, instead of the 0Ls and anon abusers who actually broke forum rules?
If I'm outted, my RICH posting history will be revealed. I don't think it'll be of any use to someone trying to figure out who I am IRL, but the whole point of outting me here is so that someone IRL can try to out me.
Then, fair game, nothing to lose, etc.

oh my god you're james bungles aren't you

OP frantically ranking list of tlsers he can blame for this thread

[fats provolone]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

my revised theory is that someone else came along and ran with the original anon's scenario and has got us all

this is like real life mafia

[BigZuck]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

my revised theory is that someone else came along and ran with the original anon's scenario and has got us all

oooh I like that

[A. Nony Mouse]

OP, I haven't really gotten into anon abuse/0Ls in this thread because it's such an absolute shitshow, it's not really worth policing.

For the record, the person who originally posted anon that everyone in your class knows who you are was fats provolone (which he admitted later in the thread), and he is not someone in your class, but was doing it to mess with your head because based on this thread, that's pretty easy to do. Your response to that trolling has inspired the rest of the well-deserved pile on. No one is actually scheming to out you to your classmates/school/prof (though I suspect people reasonably think you're going to give yourself away because your personality is, shall we say, distinctive).

I tend to think you're genuine because I feel like this isn't something anyone would even think to troll about, because it's so incredibly nonsensical. But it may be that you're a trolling genius, and if so, well-played.

If you're not trolling, it might be worth thinking that absolutely none of the people who have posted in this thread think that anything about how you've responded to any of this has been a good idea - not because it's immoral (although it is), but because it's overly complicated and pretty much doomed to sink you. Not because any one small link in the chain is necessarily implausible, but because you simply don't seem to understand how to deal with awkward situations, and how you choose to deal with them seems designed to bite you in the ass ultimately.

[A. Nony Mouse]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

my revised theory is that someone else came along and ran with the original anon's scenario and has got us all

oooh I like that

unfortunately, no

[edwardt1988]

I think I got the part about him lying about his dad April. But I don't understand the thing about emailing the partner and 20 different other people or whatever. Like, I seriously can't even follow what is happening. Maybe I'm just dense but I don't get it.

Can someone provide a tl;dr as to what is happening in this thread and what the hell the OP is even talking about?

OP can't handle a normal convo and lied to professor, who is also a partner at a firm that OP wants to apply to, about having a summer job at Firm X

OP thinks that when he does apply to Firm X after next summer, the partner will get suspicious. But OP, in his infinite wisdom, plans to use an extremely believable excuse to throw said partner off the scent. OP also plans to sleep with the partner's daughter, impregnate her, and blame it on 20-30 other students at 3 different lawschools. But more on that later

Some anon suggested that he knows who OP is. OP said that if he gets outed, he will accuse 20-30 other students at various schools of having started this thread. OP sees nothing wrong with this ingenious plan

[anyriotgirl]

damn

[Paul Campos]

The odds of a 3L who didn't have a 2L BL SA successfully mass mailing a firm that is grade selective in regard to students at the school OP attends can be safely calculated as zero, so this whole barking mad scheme was completely pointless from the beginning.

Also, the odds that OP would have gotten a worse grade than he otherwise would have gotten in this class if he hadn't lied to the partner were also zero.

[pancakes3]

Scenario 1:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible.

Interviewer: So where did you work this summer?

Scenario 2:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?

studentX: No. I think you have me confused with someone else. You might have been thinking of student Y or student Z who was at Non-NYC firm. Students A-K from NYU and Chicago who also summered at non-NYC firm who you may or may not know. Additionally, it couldn't have possibly been me because I'm currently taking care of my sick uncle.

Professor: Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear that. So, are you working at all right now?

[fats provolone]

Scenario 3:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?

OP: I was taking care of my sick father, April, and have extensive documentation to prove it. I've kidnapped your wife and she is being held hostage in a warehouse in Queens. If I do not send a predetermined text message code at exactly 1:39pm, she will die. The warehouse was rented in studentY's name, and I have planted evidence in her apartment in case I am compromised. So, see you next summer?

[rpupkin]

Scenario 3:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?

OP: I was taking care of my sick father, April, and have extensive documentation to prove it. I've kidnapped your wife and she is being held hostage in a warehouse in Queens. If I do not send a predetermined text message code at exactly 1:39pm, she will die. The warehouse was rented in studentY's name, and I have planted evidence in her apartment in case I am compromised. So, see you next summer?

I haven't followed this thread that closely, but my sense is that OP is well-suited to the culture of big law. If hired, OP will likely thrive as an associate.

[A. Nony Mouse]

I feel like he lacks even that minimum level of social competence, but you would know better than I.

[pancakes3]

Scenario 3:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?

OP: I was taking care of my sick father, April, and have extensive documentation to prove it. I've kidnapped your wife and she is being held hostage in a warehouse in Queens. If I do not send a predetermined text message code at exactly 1:39pm, she will die. The warehouse was rented in studentY's name, and I have planted evidence in her apartment in case I am compromised. So, see you next summer?

you think you're so funny - SO INCISIVELY FUNNY!

[edwardt1988]

Scenario 3:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?

OP: I was taking care of my sick father, April, and have extensive documentation to prove it. I've kidnapped your wife and she is being held hostage in a warehouse in Queens. If I do not send a predetermined text message code at exactly 1:39pm, she will die. The warehouse was rented in studentY's name, and I have planted evidence in her apartment in case I am compromised. So, see you next summer?

I haven't followed this thread that closely, but my sense is that OP is well-suited to the culture of big law. If hired, OP will likely thrive as an associate.

And if he doesn't, there's 30-40 students whom he could pin the non-thriving on

[Anonymous User]

(though I suspect people reasonably think you're going to give yourself away because your personality is, shall we say, distinctive)

(As an aside, how could I have gotten him to like me in the first place if I'm as socially unaware as how a bunch of anonymous online people characterize my anonymous online behavior? Obviously I must have another mode or gear IRL, right?)

Scenario 1:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible.
Interviewer: So where did you work this summer?

Scenario 2:
Professor: Oh, studentX! Good to hear from you. I would be happy to pass your resume along to the hiring committee. You were a wonderful student and I would gladly help in any way possible. How was your summer? Non-NYC firm right?
studentX: No. I think you have me confused with...
Professor: Oh no. I'm so sorry to hear that. So, are you working at all right now?

Both of those sound pretty good to me. After each scenario, I'd tell the interviewer where I was that summer. But why would I tell you?

For the record, the person who originally posted anon that everyone in your class knows who you are was fats provolone (which he admitted later in the thread), and he is not someone in your class

Even so, if someone in my class is actually reading this, it's important for them to know that how I responded to fats provolone is how I'd respond. So if they have any cute ideas, they had better be pretty damn sure who it is. And again, I have another mode/gear IRL, so my anonymous personality here doesn't correspond to IRL.

Just as I'm sure fats provolone and all the other 4-digit post count posters in this thread shift into another gear IRL.