Cried for first time at work Forum

[Anonymous User]

today.

I always told myself I never would.

I am extremely lucky to have such a good job in this economy. But it's turned into some partners learning that they can treat others a certain way. I just hate that I feel so human sometimes. I wish there were a way out of this life.

Anyone else out there make market or over market and occasionally just not feel like continuing anymore?

I almost quit today,

I know it is a very screwed up question, but I always wonder if there are others out there.

[84651846190]

Anyone else out there make market or over market and occasionally just not feel like continuing anymore?

Every god damn day.

[Danteshek]

You're overpaid. If you were fairly paid you would be treated more fairly

[filibuster]

out the firm

[Anonymous User]

I got yelled at 3 times for no reason. Have to have thick skin you will get use to it.

[Anonymous User]

I try to tell myself that the partner is probably yelling at me because someone yelled at him/her. In my experience I've found that it's almost never about you. It's a high pressure world, and there is a lot of money on the line. And know this. 95% of the time, the partner forgets about it because that interaction is not super important in their eyes. So while we agonize over it, they're on to the next thing. Hang in there and keep working.

[ze2151]

^ inadvertent anon.

[Anonymous User]

First year here. Started a few weeks ago in a busy corporate practice. Haven't been yelled at yet, but have been scolded for things that either 1) weren't my fault or 2) someone else told me to do. Pretty sure this is the norm.

Sorry to hear of your troubles, OP.

[romothesavior]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

[mvp99]

First year here. Started a few weeks ago in a busy corporate practice. Haven't been yelled at yet, but have been scolded for things that either 1) weren't my fault or 2) someone else told me to do. Pretty sure this is the norm.

Sorry to hear of your troubles, OP.

Happened to me too... not sure whether I should let them know of their mistake or shut up and accept the whipping

[Desert Fox]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

[Anonymous User]

.

[Anonymous User]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

ditto. every female associate i know at my firm has cried at least once.

[Tanicius]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

One of my friends at a firm in NYC was told by a male partner that there have been complaints about how often she smiles. He told her to stop smiling so much because it was alienating her older female coworkers who were no longer as optimistic as her and did not want to feel more miserable by being reminded of the fact that other women in the world are happier.

[Anonymous User]

I used to work for someone who was notoriously difficult to interact with. It certainly made things unpleasant. I always accepted it as a cost of doing business as it was '07-'10 and most people didn't have much leverage. Around my third year I started spending a lot more time networking with people in a field I was interested in joining.

Once I got a job offer I wanted (outside of law), I left. ~40% pay cut at the time. Never looked back and never regretted it.

[84651846190]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

One of my friends at a firm in NYC was told by a male partner that there have been complaints about how often she smiles. He told her to stop smiling so much because it was alienating her older female coworkers who were no longer as optimistic as her and did not want to feel more miserable by being reminded of the fact that other women in the world are happier.

(mental illness)

[kjartan]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

ditto. every female associate i know at my firm has cried at least once.

Question for men: can you cry? I don't think I've cried in at least 5 years, even when things get really bad. Maybe something is wrong with me.

[AReasonableMan]

I cry, but I wouldn't if someone yelled at me or made fun of me. I either don't care or feel angry. I tend to only cry when empathetic like certain movies, or seeing a dying dog. In my own life, I'm much more apathetic, aggressive and combative. But this is because I'm a caring asshole. I've tried to be a nicer person but it never took.

[84651846190]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. Every female big lawyer I know with a soul has cried. Multiple times.

ditto. every female associate i know at my firm has cried at least once.

Question for men: can you cry? I don't think I've cried in at least 5 years, even when things get really bad. Maybe something is wrong with me.

Last time I cried was during law school, but it was only partly related to law school.

[Anonymous User]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. I feel like it's the opposite, you just can't let other people see you cry. I have yet to get scolded or yelled at (I started in September, so I'm sure it's just a matter of time), but I cry just about every week. Mainly, because I feel overburdened, or I'm just feeling sorry for myself after billing a 68 hour week (this week...actually, the meltdown occurred this afternoon, and I'm now at home wrapped up in a blanket, debating when I really need to start drafting our opposition that's due Monday. Five pager, but still...everything takes longer than I expect). I'm hoping it gets better, as I get better at figuring out how long things take and how to say no and mean it (unfortunately, i do have some shareholders who simply won't take no for an answer...hate those...). So, for those who cry, you definitely aren't alone. Just don't let anyone see that shit, if you can avoid it.

[AReasonableMan]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. I feel like it's the opposite, you just can't let other people see you cry. I have yet to get scolded or yelled at (I started in September, so I'm sure it's just a matter of time), but I cry just about every week. Mainly, because I feel overburdened, or I'm just feeling sorry for myself after billing a 68 hour week (this week...actually, the meltdown occurred this afternoon, and I'm now at home wrapped up in a blanket, debating when I really need to start drafting our opposition that's due Monday. Five pager, but still...everything takes longer than I expect). I'm hoping it gets better, as I get better at figuring out how long things take and how to say no and mean it (unfortunately, i do have some shareholders who simply won't take no for an answer...hate those...). So, for those who cry, you definitely aren't alone. Just don't let anyone see that shit, if you can avoid it.

What's the difference between yelled at and threatened, and simply being told your work wasn't good? Nobody's going to hit you, and either way your job may be at stake.

[Anonymous User]

Ain't no cryin in biglaw.

Disagree. I feel like it's the opposite, you just can't let other people see you cry. I have yet to get scolded or yelled at (I started in September, so I'm sure it's just a matter of time), but I cry just about every week. Mainly, because I feel overburdened, or I'm just feeling sorry for myself after billing a 68 hour week (this week...actually, the meltdown occurred this afternoon, and I'm now at home wrapped up in a blanket, debating when I really need to start drafting our opposition that's due Monday. Five pager, but still...everything takes longer than I expect). I'm hoping it gets better, as I get better at figuring out how long things take and how to say no and mean it (unfortunately, i do have some shareholders who simply won't take no for an answer...hate those...). So, for those who cry, you definitely aren't alone. Just don't let anyone see that shit, if you can avoid it.

What's the difference between yelled at and threatened, and simply being told your work wasn't good? Nobody's going to hit you, and either way your job may be at stake.

Not sure. No one has said anything negative about my work yet, but I'm still very new. I don't understand where this question fits with my reply.

[Manhattan]

Look on the bright side... at least you don't work at one of these where you get yelled at all day and get paid shit for it too. You only occasionally get yelled at (or don't get yelled at at all), and you're getting paid a top 5% income to do it.

[sublime]

..

[Cogburn87]

Look on the bright side... at least you don't work at one of these where you get yelled at all day and get paid shit for it too. You only occasionally get yelled at (or don't get yelled at at all), and you're getting paid a top 5% income to do it.

Actually, even call center workers are happier than lawyers.