Funniest thing you've heard about the job searching process? Forum

[Anonymous User]

A group of 4 people sitting in the school's lounge--probably a group of 1Ls--said, "Something like 45% of us will get biglaw offers from OCI. Can't wait to make 6 figures."

[guano]

A group of 4 people sitting in the school's lounge--probably a group of 1Ls--said, "Something like 45% of us will get biglaw offers from OCI. Can't wait to make 6 figures."

Just work hard for another year, and you'll be fine (law school admin staff to a family friend who struck out at OCI)

[JuTMSY4]

A group of 4 people sitting in the school's lounge--probably a group of 1Ls--said, "Something like 45% of us will get biglaw offers from OCI. Can't wait to make 6 figures."

Just work hard for another year, and you'll be fine (law school admin staff to a family friend who struck out at OCI)

Anything from my CSO

[Anonymous User]

A group of 4 people sitting in the school's lounge--probably a group of 1Ls--said, "Something like 45% of us will get biglaw offers from OCI. Can't wait to make 6 figures."

Just work hard for another year, and you'll be fine (law school admin staff to a family friend who struck out at OCI)

I just wish OCS/school admin would just sit people down and be like, "Listen, real talk. A slim minority of you will get OCI offers. Another group of you who hustle your ass off day in and day out may have a chance of gainful legal employment."

[Anonymous User]

A friend of mine (with nearly perfect grades at HYS) was interviewing with dla piper. (Not sure why she bid on dla piper with her grades, but that's another story.) When she got the inevitable "Why DLA Piper?" question in her screener, she apparently replied, "Because I think I would really ENJOY DLA PIPER!" (She deliberately put the intonation on the last three words.) The interviewer apparently didn't notice (or was just too polite to say anything). She didn't get a callback.

[Anonymous User]

My Career Services Person: "How are you doing with your job search?"

Me: "I've had some interviews that I've been rejected from and I'm networking but it's tough."

My Career Services Person: "Cool. Bye."

[Anonymous User]

My Career Services Person: "How are you doing with your job search?"

Me: "I've had some interviews that I've been rejected from and I'm networking but it's tough."

My Career Services Person: "Cool. Bye."

One time during a career services meeting my counselor spent 5 minutes explaining to me how to properly send a "professional" email.

[BarbellDreams]

My Career Services Person: "How are you doing with your job search?"

Me: "I've had some interviews that I've been rejected from and I'm networking but it's tough."

My Career Services Person: "Cool. Bye."

I laughed out loud. Well done.

CSO is just funny. My conversations with them have been the following:

Convo 1:

Me: "I'm meeting with attorneys and networking but I'm not really landing many interviews. I have good grades so I'm not sure whats wrong."
CSO: "Well, have you thought about contacting (insert attorney name) like we told you?"
Me: "Yes, I met with him already but he wasn't terribly receptive."
CSO: "We're glad that we could help you find this connection and I'm sure it will help out in the future. *Pats themselves on back*"
Me: "........."

Convo 2:
Me: "Have you sent my resume to the employer you identified for me?"
CSO: "No, I don't feel comfortable using a personal connection on someone who hasn't updated their resume to meet our high standards."
Me: "......well, what would you like me to change?"
CSO: "You need to bold more, bold makes things stand out you know. I'd bold this part *points to basically everything on the resume*. Also, I think you need to include every job and membership you've ever had since high school so the employer can get to know the real you."
Me: "Umm... if I include everything since high school my resume will be 3 pages long and will have things like "Old Nacy Associate" on it, is that really relevant."
CSO: Yes, yes it is. We need you to do that or we won't be sending your app."

Convo 3:
CSO: "It has come to our attention that you have applied to (insert regional firm name) through their recruiting department when (firm) is potentially coming to OCI in 3 months. We strongly discourage this type of behavior and ask that you only apply to firms through OCI. This way all students have equal footing and no one is getting an advantage or disadvantage in application."

Me (I went NUTS in response to this): "Hello CSO, in response to your recent email I'd like to point out a few reasons why I applied and plan on further applying to firms in the area, whether they are coming to OCI or not: 1.) Its June. The OCI list isn't even published and I cannot predict what firm will or wont be coming to OCI. Thus, in stead of following your advise and not applying to ANY for the reason that they MIGHT be coming to OCI I'd rather just apply to all of them. I will otherwise basically be left with no applications given that ANY firms in the area MIGHT come to OCI and thus I couldn't apply to them directly. 2.) While I understand that your main goal is to keep students on equal footing so they have similar opportunities, if you haven't noticed, the market is atrocious right now. What that means is that students SHOULD be doing anything and everything they can to get an advantage. While I understand your goals, I hope you understand mine. I am interested in obtaining a job first and foremost, and whether that involves more or less work than others, an advantage or disadvantage, matters little to me. My own employment is whats important to me, and discouraging students from taking extra steps to put themselves at an advantage over others is a little ridiculous in my book so I absolutely plan on mailing out applications today while most students wait for OCI. 3.) While your advise is understood, it would be valid when the economy was great and everyone could get jobs. Given that you cannot get me or everyone jobs, I have to resort to mailing firms myself. If this changes and you find jobs for everyone, please let me know and I will discontinue my efforts.

CSO: *Didn't respond*

[rad lulz]

A friend of mine (with nearly perfect grades at HYS) was interviewing with DLA Piper. (Not sure why she bid on DLA Piper with her grades, but that's another story.) When she got the inevitable "Why DLA Piper?" question in her screener, she apparently replied, "Because I think I would really ENJOY DLA PIPER!" (She deliberately put the intonation on the last three words.) The interviewer apparently didn't notice (or was just too polite to say anything). She didn't get a callback.

If true, that's rad

[jbiresq]

A CSO's response to everything seems to be revise your resume.

[mr. wednesday]

Really the best thing most CSOs could do right now is call a town hall meeting where unemployed 3Ls and recent grads can shout insults and throw ripe tomatoes at them. It would be just as useful as most of their efforts to get people jobs, but at least at the end the unemployed participants would feel a little better.

[Anonymous User]

cso: how was the on campus recruiting?
me: i only got 1 cb
cso: did you revise your resume?
me: yes
cso: what do you think went wrong?
me: several interviewers doing multi-office interviews already filled their [city i wanted] summer classes. one interviewer said he had no idea his firm had an office in [city i wanted]. how about we move recruiting up next year?
cso: you should consider public interest

[sgt101st]

Less funny than sad, but a CSO told a buddy of mine to take his military experience off his resume.

[Anonymous User]

My career counselor once went on and on about how attending networking events is the only way to network as a law student.

I then responded by saying how I preferred setting up one-on-one lunches with associates/partners myself because I prefer 1-on-1 discussions.

She then told me that doing so was "unfair" because other those 1-on-1 lunches are not accessible to all law students.

I was very confused as to what the problem was. I was the one who took the initiative. It's not like the attorney would only say yes to me, and not to any other student. I just happened to be one of the few that asked.

This cookie-cutter approach--at least at my school--taken by OCS just does not seem to be working. Aside from the 10% of us who received OCI offers, all the other offers that I know of were due to the student hustling/networking their ass off. And even then with those that hustled, the majority of my 2L class--probably upwards of 80%--remain unemployed.

[Danger Zone]

She then told me that doing so was "unfair" because other those 1-on-1 lunches are not accessible to all law students.

Where do CSO's get this idea that the hiring process is fair in the first place? Fuck them.

[guano]

She then told me that doing so was "unfair" because other those 1-on-1 lunches are not accessible to all law students.

Where do CSO's get this idea that the hiring process is fair in the first place? Fuck them.

Boomerism

Edit: if they were any good at the hiring process, they'd have a real job, rather than career services

[stillwater]

She then told me that doing so was "unfair" because other those 1-on-1 lunches are not accessible to all law students.

Where do CSO's get this idea that the hiring process is fair in the first place? Fuck them.

Career Services is tso awesome!!!!!! Three cheers for CSO!!!!

[Blindmelon]

After trying to break into public interest for a year after graduation and failing: "I guess I'll have to start applying to big firms now."

[BVest]

Less funny than sad, but a CSO told a buddy of mine to take his military experience off his resume.

They told me to take a certain former job off my resume. It has no relevance to practice of law and was a while back, but it is unique (and there was later a bestseller and a movie or two about the employer). I left it on. Literally EVERY single interview I have had has included a question about it, usually along the lines of "You've gotta tell me about _____________. How was that?"

[hichvichwoh]

man, "funniest" turned into "most fuck-headedly retarded" rather quickly..

[guano]

man, "funniest" turned into "most fuck-headedly retarded" rather quickly..

Well, considering the subject...

[rad lulz]

j

[Anonymous User]

Less funny than sad, but a CSO told a buddy of mine to take his military experience off his resume.

I got the same advice, even though I am 99% sure the ONLY reason I got any CBs was because of the veterans network

[Gorki]

Networking.

[Anonymous User]

Can someone give an explanation for why in the world a career counselor would tell anyone to take their military experience off their resume? I've seen this multiple times and it's happened at my own school, enough to make me believe it's not all that rare of an occurrence