Thank you notes Forum

[Anonymous User]

This has probably been posted before, but the search function is not helping me. When writing a thank you note to an interviewer, do you address them by their first name or by Mr./Ms. last name? This is bothering me for some reason.

[Anonymous User]

I usually just do first or include last if that's how they introduce themselves. No ms or mr.

[Anonymous User]

Err on the side of caution - I'd go with Mr./Ms.

[Blindmelon]

Mr./Ms. - you don't work there yet so its a formal communication. Err on the side of proper.

[danidancer]

1L here, but having spent a couple of years out in the workforce, I'd say I think it depends whether you got on a first name basis during the interview. Once you've established that precedent and gauged how laid back the interview is, it's probably OK to go with first name. If the interview was formal, definitely err on the side of caution.

[Aqualibrium]

1L here, but having spent a couple of years out in the workforce, I'd say I think it depends whether you got on a first name basis during the interview. Once you've established that precedent and gauged how laid back the interview is, it's probably OK to go with first name. If the interview was formal, definitely err on the side of caution.

This is correct. I always call people Mr. or Mrs. until they tell me not to. Once you've established that precedent, it's ridiculous to continue to call them anything other than their first name.

[reverendt]

If they're a lawyer I would address them as "Attorney [last name]"
So begin with "Dear Attorney Smith"

[underdawg]

lol

[Person]

I go exclusively first name unless they are introduced as Mr. Formality is lame to me. I would think less of someone who called me Mr., and I would prefer to work with people who feel the same way--at least prefer all else being equal; there are some firms that are on the formal side that I like for other reasons (i.e. Jones Day).

[RVP11]

First name. You need to be polite. You don't need to be "formal."

[lilybbloom]

If it's a junior associate or someone who took me to lunch, I go with first names. Otherwise, Mr. or Ms. and last name, unless specifically instructed to use their first name.

[RVP11]

Jeez, people. They're attorneys, not foreign dignitaries.

"Mr. Jones" comes off as gunnerish and annoying.

[Aqualibrium]

I think I should also mention that I don't write thank you notes anymore. They don't really seem to help anything. I've done just fine without writing a single thank you this year.

[War Cardinal]

I usually supplement the standard honorific with a steady (but tasteful!) barrage of British honorary titles. It's worked well for me so far--WLRK really took a liking for it--so I suggest you do the same.

Instead, then, of "Mr." or the more ridiculous "Mr. Attorney X," go with something along the lines of

The Right Honourable Lieutenant General His Highness Milord Sir Reverend Herbert Wachtell, Knight Grand Cross of the Order of the British Empire and Saviour of Muffins.

[Anonymous User]

If someone introduces themselves by their first name, and has anyone had someone introduce themselves as Mr..Mrs. XXX, you will look like a tool writing Mr./Mrs. in the thank you.

[War Cardinal]

If someone introduces themselves by their first name, and has anyone had someone introduce themselves as Mr..Mrs. XXX, you will look like a tool writing Mr./Mrs. in the thank you.

Who the hell ever introduces his/her self as Mr./Ms.?

One can't judge propriety in this case simply from how a person refers to his/her self.

[Blindmelon]

If someone introduces themselves by their first name, and has anyone had someone introduce themselves as Mr..Mrs. XXX, you will look like a tool writing Mr./Mrs. in the thank you.

First of all, I don't get the anonymous. Second of all, no one is weirded out/insulted by being called Mr./Ms.You run the risk of sounding unprofessional as a 22-25 year old emailing a senior partner whose been at the firm for 20 years and saying "Hi Bill." I err on the safer side though.

You won't get dinged for saying Mr., but you might leave a slightly bad taste in someone's mouth if they believe it isn't as professional as it could be given the circumstances.

More importantly though, I doubt it would make any difference either way.

[Bankhead]

Usually I would go with Mr./Ms. However, I had a partner who insisted that I call him by his first name ("no please, call me David.") I called him David in the thank you letter, to a favorable result.

[sbalive]

first name

[20160810]

Even a first name is probably too formal. Give them a nickname, much like Ray-J does with the syphilitic female contestants on "For the Love of Ray-J."

[Bosque]

I use the full name. Not quite as formal as titles, but not quite as informal as first names.

[War Cardinal]

I use the full name. Not quite as formal as titles, but not quite as informal as first names.

That's pretty awkward.

Dear Reginald Smith,

It was a pleasure meeting you on Wednesday. Thank you so much for taking the time to . . .

[Bosque]

I use the full name. Not quite as formal as titles, but not quite as informal as first names.

That's pretty awkward.

Dear Reginald Smith,

It was a pleasure meeting you on Wednesday. Thank you so much for taking the time to . . .

How is that any more awkward than "Dear Mr. Smith", or "Dear Reginald?" Sounds just fine to me.

[Anonymous User]

.

[whyamidoingthis]

General rules (taught to me by a VP of HR at a Fortune 500):

If they sign an email with their first name (as opposed to their full name), you are totally safe using the first name from then on.

If there has been no written communication and assuming you are in your 20s:
Interviewer is in their 20s--address by first name, highly unlikely to be offended by informality
Interviewer is in their 30s--judgment call, unless you're a complete social idiot, you should be able to tell how "formal" or "informal" someone is with you during your interview
Interviewer is 40+--stick with Mr./Ms for the first email/letter even if they introduced themselves in an interview by their first name. It's accepted social protocol and no one will fault you for following it (I know someone said it's gunnery, but seriously, it's been considered appropriate etiquette for centuries, check you emily post). There are people, on the other hand, who WILL fault you for being too casual. I'm from a very informal part of the country and I've heard older execs there (and where I live now) complain that people our age are pretty presumptuous about the first name thing. Seems better to be safe than sorry.