Biglaw Sr Associate Burnout and Pain Forum

[Anonymous User]

So you're willing to see your kids significantly less so you can send them to private school so they have a shot at being pro golfers? I guess it really does take all kinds....

Apparently there are also wives willing to watch their husbands slowly and painfully march toward early death, supposedly so the kids can have private school though. This post has been revealing.

[MarcusH]

I get the private school thing if you're living in actual New York City proper. but if you're paying for private school in a New York-area bougie suburb---or god-forbid, a San Francisco-area one---you're either filthy, filthy rich or a rube.

my public high school offered 20+ AP classes, I had friends taking college-level linear algebra on weekends, most of us did the stupid Ivy Plus summer day camps---all the bullshit that people talk about their fancy private having. people had great college admissions, got a ton of acquaintances who are doctors now...

that's what you get when the median home price in your suburb is a jillion dollars (my parents couldn't really afford it but bought anyway) and everyone wants their kids to go to a top college

unless the private school has some sort of inappropriate-but-real backdoor "in" with desirable colleges, I don't see the value when you have access to a Palo Alto High School, or a Thomas Jefferson, or w/e

like yeah the facilities at XYZ Private are probably nicer and there's more administrative staffing, but that's not shit that's actually gonna improve student learning

Depends... I went to one of those elite public schools (not TJ fancy, but just below that; my parents similarly stretched), went to a top Ivy for undergrad and law school... but would send kids private because (a) I can afford it, (b) I want my kids to have smaller class sizes and more extracurricular opportunities and (c) I want the school and my kids' teachers and admins to be more accountable to the parents then they were at my elite public school. I also don't necessarily want my kids to go the same route as me (particularly on the law front but I also would not wish for them to be bankers, consultants or surgeons, as life is not all about prestige chasing and I can afford to have my kids do something better or at least more interesting and still provide a safety net for them).

You think that sending your kids to private school will make them less inclined to follow a traditional professional path? That’s completely irrational.

This is 100% accurate. Very few (none?) of the working artists I know attended elite private schools. Plus in my experience "more accountable to the parents" means parents try and micromanage their kids' education which (1) sucks for both the kids and teachers and (2) sucks for the other parents because you basically have people thinking they can demand their preferred curriculum or pedagogy because they're paying 60k for second grade, damn it!

YMMV, and never said I want my kids to be "working artists" - would actually prefer sports (ideally country club ones) tbh...I'm not fighting any class warfare here; this is just what I enjoy and the life I chose by sacrificing more than I would want my kids to have to sacrifice and ideally retiring young.

More on subject - I think everyone can agree if you're privileged enough to be able to, then you should always put your health before the job and burnout is real in this profession and many others (including lower paid ones like teacher).

So you're willing to see your kids significantly less so you can send them to private school so they have a shot at being pro golfers? I guess it really does take all kinds....

Ok this is flame

Actually, not, but I worked just as much in-house for less money and stability... in-house isn't always that great (sadly).

[Anonymous User]

Anyone know whether their firm offers sabbatical/paid leave? I am exploring that route now.

[Anonymous User]

Anyone know whether their firm offers sabbatical/paid leave? I am exploring that route now.

I recently spoke to my benefits group about this and my firm offers paid medical leave. I haven't gone through the process with the third-party provider, but apparently long-term insurance can cover full salary for up to 3 months, which was shocking to me. I can't believe more people don't do this (I guess b/c they think it will tank their prospects going forward). I only know one person at my firm who has ever done this and they left the firm not long after the leave. Not sure what they were paid.