2015 Biglaw Boneus Thread Forum

[Monochromatic Oeuvre]

What time are we thinking for the NOBONUSES/NORAISES announcement?

Cravath partners struggling to hide their glee at having raised PPP 0.1%, making sure they ask you to complete all their projects by 5 PM, when you'll begin contemplating murdering them for a lot longer than usual.

[smaug]

Commentator on ATL claiming 2013 bonuses. REAL OR FLAME, TLS?

[anonnymouse]

Commentator on ATL claiming 2013 bonuses. REAL OR FLAME, TLS?

Flame. Everyone knows it's NOBONUS.

[smaug]

Commentator on ATL claiming 2013 bonuses. REAL OR FLAME, TLS?

Flame. Everyone knows it's NOBONUS.

Damn. Owned by my own prognostication.

[anonnymouse]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

[smaug]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

Unironically voting that bonuses will be down

[Monochromatic Oeuvre]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

They did the same thing in last year's thread too. What exactly compels someone to anonymously predict something that's already happened? Wanna tell me how President Kennedy's trip to Dallas is gonna go while you're at it?

[anonnymouse]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

They did the same thing in last year's thread too. What exactly compels someone to anonymously predict something that's already happened? Wanna tell me how President Kennedy's trip to Dallas is gonna go while you're at it?

MO is it possible to lock the poll after the first announcement?

[februarybartaker]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

They did the same thing in last year's thread too. What exactly compels someone to anonymously predict something that's already happened? Wanna tell me how President Kennedy's trip to Dallas is gonna go while you're at it?

Too soon

[TLSModBot]

Proudly voting that bonuses will be up.

Cravath will break tradition and raise from last year, showing what a dynamic powerhouse they are and not just a market-setter via bloated inertia. One or two other firms which planned to beat Cravath and shatter the market themselves will frantically re-assess. At least one will make the bold move of upping the bonuses further (we'll call them Firm B). One last firm (Firm C)will push even higher but only for midlevels or really high hours requirement or something in an attempt to recapture the magic but the talk will still be about Cravath and Firm B. Firm C announces associate base pay raises starting at 190K and everything goes into an uproar. Major profitable firms, having already secretly assessed this possibility, quickly match. Others who can't either announce a halfhearted raise below 190K or simply give up trying to compete. The very concept of Biglaw shudders and groans as the elite few 'haves' establish a firm beachhead of pay incentives that the remaining 'have-nots' can not now and never will again hope to reach. The 'haves' attract better and better talent, leaving the dregs for the castaway firms. Concomitantly, clients gravitate to these firms and business suffers at the now anemic former Biglaw (say, everything below V24). Desperate mergers and partner defections ensue, but can't ultimately stop the resulting cascade of firm failures that trigger massive panic in the legal world - overcompensating class/pay freezes, reduced hiring, etc. The increase in unemployment touches off reduced spending on legal process outsource companies (Discovery, contract reviewers, etc.) which cause even further unemployment. Elite firms, awash in clients but lacking enough talent to handle the sudden inflow of work, turn away otherwise profitable representation opportunities. Deal volume decreases, and we head towards another recession. Still not fully recovered from the last recession, global markets can't take the hit and economies spiral out of control. Jobs are lost, governments fall, and the lights wink out across the New York city skyline. All is madness for a while, then all is quiet, forever.

[smaug]

You should send that as an anon email to a Cravath partner

[TFALAWL]

Proudly voting that bonuses will be up.

Cravath will break tradition and raise from last year, showing what a dynamic powerhouse they are and not just a market-setter via bloated inertia. One or two other firms which planned to beat Cravath and shatter the market themselves will frantically re-assess. At least one will make the bold move of upping the bonuses further (we'll call them Firm B). One last firm (Firm C)will push even higher but only for midlevels or really high hours requirement or something in an attempt to recapture the magic but the talk will still be about Cravath and Firm B. Firm C announces associate base pay raises starting at 190K and everything goes into an uproar. Major profitable firms, having already secretly assessed this possibility, quickly match. Others who can't either announce a halfhearted raise below 190K or simply give up trying to compete. The very concept of Biglaw shudders and groans as the elite few 'haves' establish a firm beachhead of pay incentives that the remaining 'have-nots' can not now and never will again hope to reach. The 'haves' attract better and better talent, leaving the dregs for the castaway firms. Concomitantly, clients gravitate to these firms and business suffers at the now anemic former Biglaw (say, everything below V24). Desperate mergers and partner defections ensue, but can't ultimately stop the resulting cascade of firm failures that trigger massive panic in the legal world - overcompensating class/pay freezes, reduced hiring, etc. The increase in unemployment touches off reduced spending on legal process outsource companies (Discovery, contract reviewers, etc.) which cause even further unemployment. Elite firms, awash in clients but lacking enough talent to handle the sudden inflow of work, turn away otherwise profitable representation opportunities. Deal volume decreases, and we head towards another recession. Still not fully recovered from the last recession, global markets can't take the hit and economies spiral out of control. Jobs are lost, governments fall, and the lights wink out across the New York city skyline. All is madness for a while, then all is quiet, forever.

So this is unverified, but one of the comments under ATL's latest bonus articles states that the Cravath memo just came out and that it's the same as 2013 here's to hoping it's a troll

[FSK]

ATL comments are surely a reliable source of information.

Accidental anon: flawschoolkid

[anonnymouse]

Proudly voting that bonuses will be up.

Cravath will break tradition and raise from last year, showing what a dynamic powerhouse they are and not just a market-setter via bloated inertia. One or two other firms which planned to beat Cravath and shatter the market themselves will frantically re-assess. At least one will make the bold move of upping the bonuses further (we'll call them Firm B). One last firm (Firm C)will push even higher but only for midlevels or really high hours requirement or something in an attempt to recapture the magic but the talk will still be about Cravath and Firm B. Firm C announces associate base pay raises starting at 190K and everything goes into an uproar. Major profitable firms, having already secretly assessed this possibility, quickly match. Others who can't either announce a halfhearted raise below 190K or simply give up trying to compete. The very concept of Biglaw shudders and groans as the elite few 'haves' establish a firm beachhead of pay incentives that the remaining 'have-nots' can not now and never will again hope to reach. The 'haves' attract better and better talent, leaving the dregs for the castaway firms. Concomitantly, clients gravitate to these firms and business suffers at the now anemic former Biglaw (say, everything below V24). Desperate mergers and partner defections ensue, but can't ultimately stop the resulting cascade of firm failures that trigger massive panic in the legal world - overcompensating class/pay freezes, reduced hiring, etc. The increase in unemployment touches off reduced spending on legal process outsource companies (Discovery, contract reviewers, etc.) which cause even further unemployment. Elite firms, awash in clients but lacking enough talent to handle the sudden inflow of work, turn away otherwise profitable representation opportunities. Deal volume decreases, and we head towards another recession. Still not fully recovered from the last recession, global markets can't take the hit and economies spiral out of control. Jobs are lost, governments fall, and the lights wink out across the New York city skyline. All is madness for a while, then all is quiet, forever.

So this is unverified, but one of the comments under ATL's latest bonus articles states that the Cravath memo just came out and that it's the same as 2013 here's to hoping it's a troll

Already addressed. Get on my level.

[Monochromatic Oeuvre]

Also, poasting for posterity that as of 1:30PM EST on 11/30, 57% of TLS poll respondents expect no change to bonuses.

All you mouthbreathers that come itt and vote AFTER bonuses are announced are less than useless.

They did the same thing in last year's thread too. What exactly compels someone to anonymously predict something that's already happened? Wanna tell me how President Kennedy's trip to Dallas is gonna go while you're at it?

MO is it possible to lock the poll after the first announcement?

If there's a way to do that, I don't know what it is.

We'll know anyway that a small majority voted for bonuses staying the same, with most of the rest predicting they would be up.

[charliekelly33]

Proudly voting that bonuses will be up.

Cravath will break tradition and raise from last year, showing what a dynamic powerhouse they are and not just a market-setter via bloated inertia. One or two other firms which planned to beat Cravath and shatter the market themselves will frantically re-assess. At least one will make the bold move of upping the bonuses further (we'll call them Firm B). One last firm (Firm C)will push even higher but only for midlevels or really high hours requirement or something in an attempt to recapture the magic but the talk will still be about Cravath and Firm B. Firm C announces associate base pay raises starting at 190K and everything goes into an uproar. Major profitable firms, having already secretly assessed this possibility, quickly match. Others who can't either announce a halfhearted raise below 190K or simply give up trying to compete. The very concept of Biglaw shudders and groans as the elite few 'haves' establish a firm beachhead of pay incentives that the remaining 'have-nots' can not now and never will again hope to reach. The 'haves' attract better and better talent, leaving the dregs for the castaway firms. Concomitantly, clients gravitate to these firms and business suffers at the now anemic former Biglaw (say, everything below V24). Desperate mergers and partner defections ensue, but can't ultimately stop the resulting cascade of firm failures that trigger massive panic in the legal world - overcompensating class/pay freezes, reduced hiring, etc. The increase in unemployment touches off reduced spending on legal process outsource companies (Discovery, contract reviewers, etc.) which cause even further unemployment. Elite firms, awash in clients but lacking enough talent to handle the sudden inflow of work, turn away otherwise profitable representation opportunities. Deal volume decreases, and we head towards another recession. Still not fully recovered from the last recession, global markets can't take the hit and economies spiral out of control. Jobs are lost, governments fall, and the lights wink out across the New York city skyline. All is madness for a while, then all is quiet, forever.

This. All of it.

[Big Shrimpin]

so...guessing nothing today then, eh?

[anonnymouse]

so...guessing nothing today then, eh?

In the past, the Cravath memo came out late afternoon, like 3:45 or 4:45 so don't stop mashing F5 just yet. I'd call it at 5PM.

[Monochromatic Oeuvre]

so...guessing nothing today then, eh?

It's like the buildup in a techno song. At 5 PM, get ready for the bass drop of MARKET SHATTERING

[Big Shrimpin]

xo consensus appears to be that down 15% figure

FMA

[Effingham]

xo consensus appears to be that down 15% figure

FMA

yeah, same people that ran the 190 flame, I wouldn't buy into it yet.

[Br3v]

NO BONUS and 190

[Danger Zone]

stub year; dr

[Big Shrimpin]

xo consensus appears to be that down 15% figure

FMA

yeah, same people that ran the 190 flame, I wouldn't buy into it yet.

b-b-but xo is never wrong

and tbf, everyone here bot into 190

[anonnymouse]

Bonuses UP?