Partner keeps spelling my name wrong Forum

[nixy]

Just FWIW - I have a traditional European first name that partners, associates and clients not-irregularly fuck up. I'm also given nicknames that I don't use/never sign my emails with/are not on the website etc. Like a "John" instead of "Jonathon" sort of thing.

Personally, I don't read into it. Some mix of laziness/inattention/over-familiarity. Same thing happened on my sports teams in high school, at my professional services job prior to law school...

If it drives you insane, point it out. I don't bother, just doesn't matter that much at the end of the day

Your name is either Matthew, Michael or Christopher and you insist on people not calling you Matt, Mike or Chris. Got it.

Except he just said he doesn’t insist on not being called the nickname?

[Anonymous User]

Just FWIW - I have a traditional European first name that partners, associates and clients not-irregularly fuck up. I'm also given nicknames that I don't use/never sign my emails with/are not on the website etc. Like a "John" instead of "Jonathon" sort of thing.

Personally, I don't read into it. Some mix of laziness/inattention/over-familiarity. Same thing happened on my sports teams in high school, at my professional services job prior to law school...

If it drives you insane, point it out. I don't bother, just doesn't matter that much at the end of the day

Your name is either Matthew, Michael or Christopher and you insist on people not calling you Matt, Mike or Chris. Got it.

Edit: also, “European first name” isn’t a thing. French names are different from Italian names and Serbian names. You can just say “white sounding first name,” since that is what you meant.

But Serbians are white and their names can be tricky for dumb old Americans like me to pronounce, so maybe that's not what he (or she) meant?

[Anonymous User]

I have a very "white" last name, and some people just don't have the phonemic awareness to get the vowel sound correct depending on what dialect of US English they grew up speaking. If they are close enough, I don't bother correcting them. If they try to pronounce it the totally wrong way based on how it's spell though, I usually just mention it the very first time I hear it from them i a very low key way since most people make the mistake the first time they try. 90% of people get it "close enough" after that. The people who insist on pronouncing it how it's written after that are mainly making themselves look bad so I don't mind.

It is a bit awkward that I have a matter with a partner who gets my name TOTALLY wrong and the client is based in the country of my forefathers though who is probably confused about how I actually pronounce it.

[Anonymous User]

I agree with much of what has been written above.

I was fired as a junior associate, and half the partners in my group were rude and nasty people.

It's much more important to avoid crazy people than it is to avoid people who simply mispronounce your name.

Just get over it and hope they catch on eventually. You need to be careful or they will throw your ass out. Not immediately but eventually.

[almostperfectt]

I agree with much of what has been written above.

I was fired as a junior associate, and half the partners in my group were rude and nasty people.

It's much more important to avoid crazy people than it is to avoid people who simply mispronounce your name.

Just get over it and hope they catch on eventually. You need to be careful or they will throw your ass out. Not immediately but eventually.

I'd bet my non-fired biglaw salary that you weren't fired because you corrected something like how someone pronounces your name.

OP, be an adult and teach people how to treat you.

[Anonymous User]

I have a Jewish name that gets mispronounced so I just switched to going by the English equivalent of the name.

[Anonymous User]

Assert your dominance and spell their name wrong.

[Anonymous User]

I have a Jewish name that gets mispronounced so I just switched to going by the English equivalent of the name.

This reminds me of a friend who has a weird first name. In our single days, when he met girls, he got to the point where he would just tell them his name is "Pete" (not his name) because otherwise there would be a back and forth of "my name is x" "what??" "x" "y?" "x" "z?" "x" "x?". Always funny when some of these girls would end up hanging out, and on maybe the 2nd or 3rd hangout find out his name was not Pete.

[The Lsat Airbender]

Just FWIW - I have a traditional European first name that partners, associates and clients not-irregularly fuck up. I'm also given nicknames that I don't use/never sign my emails with/are not on the website etc. Like a "John" instead of "Jonathon" sort of thing.

Personally, I don't read into it. Some mix of laziness/inattention/over-familiarity. Same thing happened on my sports teams in high school, at my professional services job prior to law school...

If it drives you insane, point it out. I don't bother, just doesn't matter that much at the end of the day

Your name is either Matthew, Michael or Christopher and you insist on people not calling you Matt, Mike or Chris. Got it.

Edit: also, “European first name” isn’t a thing. French names are different from Italian names and Serbian names. You can just say “white sounding first name,” since that is what you meant.

A lot of European names are common to swathes of the continent due to common cultural heritage (biblical/Latin/Greek/Germanic/Slavic/etc.), though? The post you're replying to would make perfect sense if their name were Jean-Phillipe, Antonio, or Vladimir. "White sounding" also elides the fact that many nonwhite people have European names or use them in a professional setting.

[Anonymous User]

Honestly, just be an adult and teach that partner how to spell your name. Tell that partner you don't like it when he/she gets her name wrong. No way in hell would anybody fire you for saying that. If you are at a firm where you could get fired for saying that, then you should just leave that firm.

[Anonymous User]

I will say, the longer you wait, the more awkward it gets. I was in a small seminar once in grad school where the professor called a woman a particular name - say Jen - for 3/4 of the semester until one day she finally said - my name is actually June. I remember it all these years later because the moment was so awkward given that he had called her by the wrong name for months. The professor was apologetic and started calling her by the correct name. Most people aren't dicks and will want to call you by the correct name. Spelling my name incorrectly in an email would bother me much less than actually getting my name wrong out loud, but if it really bothers you, it's better to say something sooner rather than later (and to echo what others have said, I would say it in person, without others around, perhaps as you are wrapping up a conversation - no need to make a joke or a song and dance, just a quick and gentle correction and then move on).

[Anonymous User]

Honestly, just be an adult and teach that partner how to spell your name. Tell that partner you don't like it when he/she gets her name wrong. No way in hell would anybody fire you for saying that. If you are at a firm where you could get fired for saying that, then you should just leave that firm.

This is such a dumb take. NO ONE is saying they are worried they will get fired for correcting the mistake. Jesus. Where are people's critical thinking skills before they post on this site?

[nixy]

No one writing about people getting their name wrong seems to have said they’re literally afraid of getting fired, but this user seems to suggest they should be.

I agree with much of what has been written above.

I was fired as a junior associate, and half the partners in my group were rude and nasty people.

It's much more important to avoid crazy people than it is to avoid people who simply mispronounce your name.

Just get over it and hope they catch on eventually. You need to be careful or they will throw your ass out. Not immediately but eventually.