Lying about landing big law? Forum

[wiseowl]

This thread reminds me of why I detest people who feverishly ask other people how they did at OCI under the guise of 'we're friends, I just want to know how you're doing!'. I'm not justifying lying, but it's that kind of mentality which encourages people to feel ashamed and fib about their summer employment.

fixed

[Blessedassurance]

Seems like a rational individual. The fact that you're concerned about this says more about you than your "friend" and paradoxically justifies his lie in the first place.

I bet you can't wait to let the world know he was no-offered and is lying about it for his own sanity.

User has been outed.

[Anonymous User]

Discussing religion, politics, or *work* is rude, unless you're among close friends.

That being said, lying under pressure and lying to save face are shady characteristics, especially in an aspiring lawyer.

lol...just lol.

[HeavenWood]

so I am both an ass and an open book?

I asked everyone I recognize where they are going, I suppose I just don't know any manners!

it doesn't make you wrong, it just makes you an asshole

But that would be very far from the truth. Just goes to show these categorical statements don't work.

Actually, a lot of your peers would disagree with you on that.

If that's how you feel, why don't you say it to his face?

[jcojd]

Actually, a lot of your peers would disagree with you on that.

If that's how you feel, why don't you say it to his face?

Don't know him well enough. Most interactions I've had with him outside of OCI have proven him to be a very affable and friendly guy (and I think a lot of people would agree with me on this), but I've heard things about how some of his interactions concerning OCI have rubbed people the wrong way. If he was one of my good friends, I would definitely suggest being a little more sensitive.

I'm not trying to hide under the anonymity of the internet, although that did come off in a more hostile manner than I meant. I wouldn't have said anything here if he hadn't essentially said that "I do this all the time and there's nothing wrong with it." (I suppose I could have said "Maybe some people don't agree" but then we would've just gotten into some kind of theoretical argument about what people may or may not think.) People have felt uncomfortable about that kind of behavior a lot, regardless of intent, and I think it's important to recognize that sometimes a little sensitivity is in order in an economy like this one - even if you technically don't owe your peers anything.

[Perseus_I]

Actually, a lot of your peers would disagree with you on that.

If that's how you feel, why don't you say it to his face?

Don't know him well enough. Most interactions I've had with him outside of OCI have proven him to be a very affable and friendly guy (and I think a lot of people would agree with me on this), but I've heard things about how some of his interactions concerning OCI have rubbed people the wrong way. If he was one of my good friends, I would definitely suggest being a little more sensitive.

I'm not trying to hide under the anonymity of the internet, although that did come off in a more hostile manner than I meant. I wouldn't have said anything here if he hadn't essentially said that "I do this all the time and there's nothing wrong with it." (I suppose I could have said "Maybe some people don't agree" but then we would've just gotten into some kind of theoretical argument about what people may or may not think.) People have felt uncomfortable about that kind of behavior a lot, regardless of intent, and I think it's important to recognize that sometimes a little sensitivity is in order in an economy like this one - even if you technically don't owe your peers anything.

Law students get butt-hurt way too easily. I have noticed this too, and I don't talk about OCI unless someone else brings it up. Maybe whatever-his-name (R6 Philly?) is just had a career before law school and is used to being around less self-absorbed people. Look, I struck out, and I don't have a problem with people asking this question. I don't tie up my self worth in big law like some of my classmates do, and I am fully satisfied with other opportunities that opened up. I think I am just more mature than most law students.

[keg411]

^ IMO, it's way easier to ask people questions about jobs/etc. when you DON'T have one lined up. Because then you don't feel like a douchetwat.

[Tanicius]

^ IMO, it's way easier to ask people questions about jobs/etc. when you DON'T have one lined up. Because then you don't feel like a douchetwat.

Here here. I ask people about jobs all the time because of this.

[Anonymous User]

^ IMO, it's way easier to ask people questions about jobs/etc. when you DON'T have one lined up. Because then you don't feel like a douchetwat.

wish there was a like button for this. I'm at a ttt with a biglaw job. I feel like a douchetwat constantly.

[HeavenWood]

^ IMO, it's way easier to ask people questions about jobs/etc. when you DON'T have one lined up. Because then you don't feel like a douchetwat.

wish there was a like button for this. I'm at a ttt with a biglaw job. I feel like a douchetwat constantly.

If people ask you what you're doing and don't like the answer they hear, that's their own problem.

[TrialLawyer16]

Actually, a lot of your peers would disagree with you on that.

If that's how you feel, why don't you say it to his face?

Don't know him well enough. Most interactions I've had with him outside of OCI have proven him to be a very affable and friendly guy (and I think a lot of people would agree with me on this), but I've heard things about how some of his interactions concerning OCI have rubbed people the wrong way. If he was one of my good friends, I would definitely suggest being a little more sensitive.

I'm not trying to hide under the anonymity of the internet, although that did come off in a more hostile manner than I meant. I wouldn't have said anything here if he hadn't essentially said that "I do this all the time and there's nothing wrong with it." (I suppose I could have said "Maybe some people don't agree" but then we would've just gotten into some kind of theoretical argument about what people may or may not think.) People have felt uncomfortable about that kind of behavior a lot, regardless of intent, and I think it's important to recognize that sometimes a little sensitivity is in order in an economy like this one - even if you technically don't owe your peers anything.

Lol.. the irony

Earlier in this thread:

I don't really feel that too many people understand how other people's feelings work.

Not a call-out, but the point is everyone should realize that you may be rubbing people the wrong way asking them these questions and not even pick up on it.

Note to all: Just don't ask unless it's a good friend. It's pretty much common sense and I haven't been through OCI. Treat asking someone their 2L summer plans like you would treat asking someone their salary because in reality that is actually what you're doing. That's why people get so upset about it.

[NewYorkStork]

I only feel sympathy for the dude. Speaking from experience as someone who has failed in spectacular ways after extreme effort many times in life, the best approach really is to just be open about it and own up to it. For one thing, being open about it, though painful at first, eventually makes you completely comfortable with it. For another thing, I think it's really comforting and inspiring for other people who are struggling to see someone who has suffered genuine disappointment and embarrassment but owns it and carries on. It's attractive, appreciated, and might actually make a difference in someone else's life as well as your own.

From suicide topics to people lying about getting a summer offer, this all shows me that the law school mindset needs to change. There's so much interesting and meaningful legal work out there, and even enormous debt won't stop you from having a very fulfilling career if you can muster the courage.

[TTRansfer]

I only feel sympathy for the dude. Speaking from experience as someone who has failed in spectacular ways after extreme effort many times in life, the best approach really is to just be open about it and own up to it. For one thing, being open about it, though painful at first, eventually makes you completely comfortable with it. For another thing, I think it's really comforting and inspiring for other people who are struggling to see someone who has suffered genuine disappointment and embarrassment but owns it and carries on. It's attractive, appreciated, and might actually make a difference in someone else's life as well as your own.

From suicide topics to people lying about getting a summer offer, this all shows me that the law school mindset needs to change. There's so much interesting and meaningful legal work out there, and even enormous debt won't stop you from having a very fulfilling career if you can muster the courage.

Agreed with just about everything in this post. I can't help but feel sorry for the kid. I mean, that's just how some people cope with shit like this.

[dresden doll]

I don't think it's a maturity thing, as much as it's a dishonesty thing. i guess it depends how you define maturity, but lying isn't really related to maturity. i don't think you'll define jerry sandusky as immature. you'd probably label him as a dishonest pedophile.

Part of being mature is not pressing people for info that's none of your business in the first place. Honesty usually counts in the context of a situation where, for whatever reason, you owe it to whoever you're dealing with to be forthright.

Lying about employment is stupid but I can hardly see it as unethical when the fact of the matter is that your classmates don't owe it to you to tell you where they're working.

Yep, you have no right to honesty in a response to a question you have no right to ask.

My basic point summarized in one sentence.

[ElvisAaron]

I learned my lesson about asking personal questions of non-close friends when I was 17. Working for a roofing company one summer, I witnessed this exchange:

Alcoholic toothless roofer: Hey dude how much you make?
Obese dirty roofer: Whats your old ladys pussy taste like?
Alcoholic toothless roofer: (stunned, confused) .....
Obese dirty roofer: Well, since we're askin each other personal questions here....

So as a rule I don't ask unsolicited unless I'd also feel comfortable asking about how their SO's genitals taste.

[TTRansfer]

I learned my lesson about asking personal questions of non-close friends when I was 17. Working for a roofing company one summer, I witnessed this exchange:

Alcoholic toothless roofer: Hey dude how much you make?
Obese dirty roofer: Whats your old ladys pussy taste like?
Alcoholic toothless roofer: (stunned, confused) .....
Obese dirty roofer: Well, since we're askin each other personal questions here....

So as a rule I don't ask unsolicited unless I'd also feel comfortable asking about how their SO's genitals taste.

How much do you make?