How to Dress For a Law School Visit and Using "Ma'am" Forum

[kristaann_vt]

Hello everyone,

I have some questions that I would appreciate guidance on.

First, I have a law school visit at the University of Connecticut this upcoming week. I'm very interested in UConn due to their children's advocacy clinic. This will be my first law school visit that is not part of a "visit day". Since it will be just me, I'm looking for advice on how to dress. Obviously, I will be neat and well groomed. However, how professional should I dress? Will a nice dress with flats suffice? I have also read that I should write a thank you card to the individual that gives me the tour. What is the proper etiquette surrounding this? Do I mail it, or hand a thank-you note to them when I leave?

Lastly, I attend college in Arkansas, and saying "Yes, ma'am" to all women older than me is expected, and I picked up this habit. At Boston College, one of the ladies in admissions told me this was "refreshing to hear", while I was quickly told at a law school in New York to stop saying it, and the woman seemed really offended. So, in general, is it better to say "Yes ma'am", or are the professionals in New England really offended?

Thank you all in advance for your time and guidance,
Krista

[CanadianWolf]

I would not hand your interviewer a thank you note when leaving.

Also, consider leaving the "Yes, Ma'am" back in Arkansas. Good for the Deep South, but might be insulting to many in Northeastern urban areas.

[kristaann_vt]

I would not hand your interviewer a thank you note when leaving.

I thought that would be super awkward, too. However, some articles I was reading about thank-you notes said that it should be given when leaving. I could not think of a non-awkward way to do this, so I figured it would be best to ask. Glad to see I wasn't as far out of the loop as the articles made me feel.

[CanadianWolf]

I've also read that you have 4 majors (as well as 6 minors). In my opinion, you might want to keep two of those majors out of the spotlight; it's enough to share that you majored in History & Political Science.

To be blunt, completing 4 majors & 6 minors during four years at the University of Arkansas suggests that the course work is less than rigorous. And I am aware that you entered college with 72 AP or other credits.

I used to research Honors Colleges & Programs throughout the country. My communications with those in charge at the University of Arkansas were the least welcoming & the most provincial.

The law school at the University of Alabama is strong if you want to remain in The South.

[SeattleStudent]

A dress with flats is good.
You can mail a thank you note after your visit.
Use ma'am in the south, not in New England.

[PoopyPants]

Maybe it's different for us, but being in the military, every civilian is either sir or ma'am. When anyone has asked me to not call them that, I quickly mention that it's a Navy habit, and they usually don't mind if I slip up after that.

[kristaann_vt]

I've also read that you have 4 majors (as well as 6 minors). In my opinion, you might want to keep two of those majors out of the spotlight; it's enough to share that you majored in History & Political Science.

To be blunt, completing 4 majors & 6 minors during four years at the University of Arkansas suggests that the course work is less than rigorous. And I am aware that you entered college with 72 AP or other credits.

I used to research Honors Colleges & Programs throughout the country. My communications with those in charge at the University of Arkansas were the least welcoming & the most provincial.

The law school at the University of Alabama is strong if you want to remain in The South.

Hi CanadianWolf,

Thanks for answering. I do not attend the University of Arkansas, I attend John Brown University. I took a full course load each semester (18-21 hours), and many of the courses for each major overlapped. I'm mentioning this because some individuals have wondered if I took more than 21 hours each semester to complete the degrees, which would signify less rigorous courses. Regardless of how this may appear, I can do nothing to undo the credits I have already earned. If the schools are concerned about the rigor of my course work, I hope my LSAT score shows that I can compete at the same level as other applicants who only focused on one major. I'm only applying to schools where my LSAT score falls into their percentiles, with my reach schools being where my LSAT falls into the 25th, and the other schools where my LSAT falls into the median or 75th.

When asked about my majors, I now just say I majored in Political Science and Family Studies.

I'm sorry you had just an bad experience with the University of Arkansas, I have never contacted them. I hope if you were ever to contact my university your experience would be much more pleasant. Thank you again for your advice.

Best,
Krista

[kristaann_vt]

A dress with flats is good.
You can mail a thank you note after your visit.
Use ma'am in the south, not in New England.

Thank you, SeattleStudent.

[A. Nony Mouse]

Ma'am-ing everyone is very uncommon in the northeast, and some people do take it as a sign you consider them Very Old. I don't think it's something to worry a great deal about because whenever I've encountered southerners/military folks doing it, it's always come across as intended to be respectful and I think most people get that. But you may run into more people like the NY person, so if it's not going to twist you into knots, I'd avoid it. If you slip up and use it, I wouldn't worry, though.

(Agree about dress and flats.)

[Traynor Brah]

leaving the "Yes, Ma'am" back in Arkansas

[Mack.Hambleton]

I'm very interested in UConn due to their children's advocacy clinic.

This is not a good way to select a law school, do more research about employment and how to look into law schools.

[kartelite]

There's nothing wrong with saying ma'am. I grew up in the (not deep) south and it's automatic as a way to respectfully address someone, but I've lived all over and never heard of anyone being offended? What is possibly offensive about it? Anyway, if someone is offended (still, I don't see why), that's their problem not yours.

[A. Nony Mouse]

There's nothing wrong with saying ma'am. I grew up in the (not deep) south and it's automatic as a way to respectfully address someone, but I've lived all over and never heard of anyone being offended? What is possibly offensive about it? Anyway, if someone is offended (still, I don't see why), that's their problem not yours.

Ma'am-ing everyone is very uncommon in the northeast, and some people do take it as a sign you consider them Very Old.

[Poldy]

Only a humorless old bat who is overly worried about her greying hair and deepening wrinkles would be offended by being called ma'am.

[PoopNpants]

I'm very interested in UConn due to their children's advocacy clinic.

This is not a good way to select a law school, do more research about employment and how to look into law schools.

Yeah Mack is right, specialty rankings really don't mean shit.

[A. Nony Mouse]

Only a humorless old bat who is overly worried about her greying hair and deepening wrinkles would be offended by being called ma'am.

For fuck's sake, people who are from the northeast are telling you that some people in the northeast get offended by being called ma'am. It's not because they're evil humorless people. Different places have different expectations. People need to get over it.

[Poldy]

Only a humorless old bat who is overly worried about her greying hair and deepening wrinkles would be offended by being called ma'am.

For fuck's sake, people who are from the northeast are telling you that some people in the northeast get offended by being called ma'am. It's not because they're evil humorless people. Different places have different expectations. People need to get over it.

I wasn't disputing that some people will get offended. I was simply providing an accurate description of them. Furthermore, I understand that people have different customs but if anyone needs to get over it and be more accommodating, surely it is the person getting offended by an innocent remark that was obviously intended to be polite and respectful.

[A. Nony Mouse]

Only a humorless old bat who is overly worried about her greying hair and deepening wrinkles would be offended by being called ma'am.

For fuck's sake, people who are from the northeast are telling you that some people in the northeast get offended by being called ma'am. It's not because they're evil humorless people. Different places have different expectations. People need to get over it.

I wasn't disputing that some people will get offended. I was simply providing an accurate description of them. Furthermore, I understand that people have different customs but if anyone needs to get over it and be more accommodating, surely it is the person getting offended by an innocent remark that was obviously intended to be polite and respectful.

It's not an accurate description if that's not what ma'am means in that area. When in Rome...

[hdunlop]

OP, this thread shows you're respectful and decent, even in response to (i think well intentioned) dickheads. Don't sweat the small stuff.

[TheSpanishMain]

OP, In the Northeast, you basically only hear "sir" or "ma'am" in a formal, customer service setting. For example, the host at a nice restaurant is showing you to your table.

Anyway, the more important issue here is that you're considering random regional schools across the country on the basis of meaningless specialty rankings. I know that's not your question, but it's infinitely more important than everything else going on here.

[ymmv]

ITT, moral OUTRAGE at the notion that people unaccustomed to encountering certain behaviors might find those behaviors strange.

[hdunlop]

I think it's more like tired of the northeast acting cosmopolitan and bring ignant

[A. Nony Mouse]

I think it's more like tired of the northeast acting cosmopolitan and bring ignant

oh, the butthurt of non-northeasterners.

[ymmv]

I think it's more like tired of the northeast acting cosmopolitan and bring ignant

Don't worry, you're weird on the west coast too.

[benwyatt]

Post removed.