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whacka · Post by **whacka** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:16 pm

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shump92 · Post by **shump92** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:27 pm

I am not going to really comment on the PS itself because I think there are underlying issues that limit how good it could be. You sound way too much like a KJD. Do you actually have experience seeing what lawyers do? What would happen if you were perpetually stuck in a desk job? Your PS SCREAMS to me that you will be disappointed with what law school and being a lawyer actually entail. If this is the best subject you can come up with, I think you will underperform your numbers. Schools are going to want to see why your lack of WE/real world exposure should not define your status as a candidate. This didn't do that for me and I am practically KJD myself. If you cannot answer my questions well I think you need to wait. Not because you lack the potential to do well in law school. But I just am not sure that you are ready for the inevitable disillusionment you will have some day. I am quite similar to you in terms of interest, but I know I can answer any questions about being quasi-KJD. You need to be able to respond to people who had a reaction like I did. Prove me wrong if you can, otherwise wait a year or two.

swampman · Post by **swampman** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:40 pm

I think the concept could work—though it risks coming off as somewhat generic, without giving us much of a sense of who you are—but your execution needs serious work. Cut down on the flowery, masterbatory language. Cut most of your sentences in half.
The organization needs serious work too. Think about what the point of each paragraph is, and why each sentence and phrase is in that paragraph—the sentences and phrases where you extol the virtues of the constitution and the Court seem scattered throughout it without much purpose or transition.

whacka · Post by **whacka** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:45 pm

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whacka · Post by **whacka** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:54 pm

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urbanist11 · Post by **urbanist11** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:55 pm

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shump92 · Post by **shump92** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 1:57 pm

Thanks for the comment- I realize that my PS seems to be pretty idealistic, which is probably a major shortcoming. As for experience with lawyers, I've had two internships that were strictly legal. The first I touched on a little bit in the PS had me interacting with briefs from counsel, and the second was with a law office. I didn't touch on them very much, however, because they only confirmed for me that I'd like to be a lawyer, they weren't a driving positive factor like my interest in the judicial process is. Should I focus more on these experiences so they know that I'm aware of what I'm getting myself into?[/quote]

I think you need to have a narrative that is as specific to your experience as possible. To me, your entire first draft should be condensed down to the intro and conclusion at most. The middle could be on what your experiences (those internships, any hardships, other life events, etc.) have done to reaffirm your academic interest. It seems like your focus in terms of that narrative should be on what the appellate process means to you. That being said, probably all law applicants for T14 schools have varying degrees of strong opinions on SCOTUS so be careful in sounding too naive. You had a PS that any idealist could have written, make it a PS that only the idealist "whacka" could have written. And think very carefully about every single word you are including. These essays are one time where being pedantic actually matters.

Also what urbanist11 said.

urbanist11 · Post by **urbanist11** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 2:01 pm

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swampman · Post by **swampman** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 2:03 pm

whacka wrote:Should I focus more on these experiences so they know that I'm aware of what I'm getting myself into?

Absolutely. The point of the PS is to talk about your experiences and who you are. They don't care about your opinions on different justices writing styles, etc, unless that someone connects directly to who you are and what you've done.

whacka · Post by **whacka** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 2:07 pm

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shump92 · Post by **shump92** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 2:11 pm

To echo what the other posters said. At first I wrote a why law essay and it didn't feel right. Eventually I wrote about my experiences with running, focusing on the most extreme and how I handled that. Then i tied it back to the law, but I wanted my resume/transcript/LSAT to show that more. The PS and LORs are more why this kid and not this other one, when "all other things are equal."

whacka · Post by **whacka** » Tue Jul 21, 2015 2:51 pm

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