PS first draft, what do you guys think? Forum

[roz77]

I apologize if the formatting makes this a giant wall of text, I'll split this up into better paragraphs soon, as this is just the rough draft.

1st draft
For as long as I can recall, science has been a great passion of mine. Growing up with both parents in the medical field, becoming a doctor was my dream. When the CSI craze hit, that dream changed to a forensic scientist. This was quickly followed by dreams of becoming a roller coaster designer or an aerospace engineer. Practicing medicine was still of interest to me though, and I often switched between wanting to be a doctor and wanting to be an engineer. Later on in high school however, I discovered what I thought was the love of my life- physics. Books on string theory and black holes fascinated me, and visions of working at a particle accelerator or NASA danced before my eyes constantly. My undergraduate career began with the satisfaction that I was set. I knew what I wanted to do with my life, and all that was left was to go live it.

Alas, this was not to be. I soon realized that I enjoyed electronic circuits more than theoretical physics, and eventually switched majors to electrical engineering. I was unsure of what lay before me. Did I want to get a job after graduation, or stay on and get a Ph.D.? Maybe I should get a business minor and go into management? I could even test the grad school waters with a Masters degree then leave after that. I was fortunate enough to find a professor willing to take on an undergrad in his research lab, solidifying my plans to get a Ph.D. I did some work in the lab during the summer, not quite ecstatic about what I was doing, but not unhappy either. As I continued this work into the fall semester however, a strange thing happened, something rather unexpected. I found it had become a chore to go to the lab. The work was boring to me, and the thought of staying another five years for a Ph.D. was terrifying. I was lucky enough to have an engineer friend who was interested in patent law. He introduced me to the notion of going to law school, and it stuck. I was an absolute wreck however. Could I really give up doing hands-on science, something I had loved since I was a child? I could hardly bear the thought of this, and more than once almost broke down because I was so close to graduation, yet I still had no idea what to do with my life. Eventually I realized a key thing about myself- I loved all the technology I learned about, but was not interested in the design or research in the slightest. It was at this point that I knew I needed to go to law school. becoming a patent lawyer would provide me an opportunity to interact with exciting technology, but not handicap me with the research and design requirement. My reading and writing skills, always underestimated as an engineer, would suit me well as a lawyer. I believe that my experience in a research lab, combined with my lifelong involvement in science and engineering gives me a unique perspective on the law, and that I would be a great fit in any law school.

[breadbucket]

You sound like a ditherer. Why would any law school gamble on someone who may take two classes, and then decide they want to design snow cone machines for NASA instead.

[roz77]

Well, I suppose the point I was trying to make was that I had realized that I did not, in fact, want to do engineering as a career, and was excited for law school.

[breadbucket]

Im sure you are excited fir law school, that's why you are applying, and the fact that you are applying telegraphs that message adequately, tell the adcomms something they don't know

[kublaikahn]

The knock on science majors is that they cannot write. I hate that preconception, but this piece reinforces it. Never write about the strength of your own writing, it begs for criticism.

[roz77]

The knock on science majors is that they cannot write. I hate that preconception, but this piece reinforces it. Never write about the strength of your own writing, it begs for criticism.

Yea you're definitely right. I've rewritten it a few times, if you guys could tell me what you think about this draft I would appreciate it.


For as long as I can recall, science has always been a great passion of mine. Throughout my childhood, I had dreams of becoming a doctor, a forensic scientist, an aerospace engineer, maybe even a roller coaster designer. Eventually however, I decided on becoming a physics major. Books on string theory and black holes fascinated me, and I had thoughts of working at NASA one day. As I came to college and worked my way through the introductory physics classes however, I realized I enjoyed electronic circuits more than theoretical physics. I switched my major to electrical engineering, and turned my thoughts towards what to do with the rest of my life. The idea of attaining a Ph.D. had always appealed to me, of becoming an expert in my chosen field. There were some thoughts of going into the work force upon graduation, but in my heart I knew I had always wanted to obtain a Ph.D. Fortunately, there was a professor who did research on lasers who was willing to let me work in his lab. I began work there in the summer. At first I enjoyed it, thinking about how this was going to help me get into graduate school. When I continued working in the lab into the fall however, a curious thing occurred. I found that I no longer enjoyed working in the lab.

To say that I was confused distraught is an understatement. Here I was, thinking about becoming a scientist or an engineer all my life, when I realized that I wasn’t having fun anymore. The only think that I could say for certain was that I had no idea what I wanted to do. Soon after this realization, a turning point in my life occurred. I was discussing engineering with a younger friend of mine. He was a sophomore who was planning on going to law school and becoming a patent lawyer. The thought of myself attending law school popped into my head, but I didn’t take it too seriously. I told myself that I would think about it, but I was probably going to stay in engineering. After all, could I really give up doing hands-on science, something I had loved since I was a child? The thought scared me, but would not go away. As the weeks rolled on and I became even more disenchanted the research, I started seriously considering patent law and law school. I discussed it with my friend and read all I could. The idea of being able to work with a broad range of technology, and not just a specific branch of electrical engineering appealed to me. I obviously still loved engineering and technology, but I wasn’t sure if I was still interested in research and design. I liked the idea of researching different technologies, of writing a patent application. The desire to attend law school grew quite strong with these thoughts.

There was still a voice in the back of my head though, asking if I was really prepared to not be an engineer. This thought seemed to be the only thing holding me back. I was fortunate to be in contact with an alumnus of my fraternity who had graduated law school a few years ago and was now practicing patent law in Chicago. Quoting directly from one of our conversations, he stated, “I enjoyed reading the papers on the new technology more than actually doing the research.” Reading this, I realized he was expressing the exact same sentiments I myself had been feeling for a while. It was at that point that I knew law school was the right choice. I understand the fact that my first year won’t involve any patent law and that it will be more reading and writing than I am used to. The fact that I have finally found what I want to do outweighs this though, and I am extremely excited to begin the next chapter of my life.

[kublaikahn]

I think it is getting better. The statement that you like to learn about technology rather than create it is the crux of it. Though, I would expect law schools to get about 100 or more of these each cycle. You need to cut the negative wishy-washy stuff and find an interesting story that makes your point.

[breadbucket]

I think it is getting better. The statement that you like to learn about technology rather than create it is the crux of it. Though, I would expect law schools to get about 100 or more of these each cycle. You need to cut the negative wishy-washy stuff and find an interesting story that makes your point.

TITCR