i'm a newbie. here's my first draft of my personal statement...let me know what you think please
and i don't know if it matters, but my stats are: 3.76 GPA 165 LSAT. Graduated 2010 from UCSB. I am hoping an excellent PS will get me into UCLA or USC [the rivalry is another matter teehee].
Many factors influence the path we choose to take in life. My father’s impact upon my life, even almost three years after his passing, still resonates. A Vietnam War refugee, he risked death to pursue one simple dream: the freedom to provide a better life for his family. I remember him as superhuman in a way, waking up at five a.m. to work overtime, and then coming home at six p.m. to eat dinner with me and to help me with my math homework. He never complained, always thankful for the opportunity to learn more and work harder. I lost my father to cancer in early 2009; it was the one thing he could not conquer. In our last conversation, he reminded me, “You have the strength to succeed in anything you pursue. Remember that determination will carry you through the hardest times.” My father’s motivation shaped the attitude with which I pursue my goals. I am determined to achieve excellence.
This inner drive to succeed proved especially useful when writing the first honors research paper of my undergraduate education. I had elected to write an analysis of how fashion plays a role in the construction of gender identity. The subject was a bit obscure, the research process still new and unfamiliar, and so my first draft was dubbed “has potential but needs work” by my Professor. Slightly disappointed, I trudged to the library and settled myself amidst a pile of books that had last seen daylight in 1994. I tabbed, I photocopied, I annotated, and I wrote. I went to office hours, and my Professor and I discussed what needed to happen to make my analysis exceptional—more depth, more cohesiveness. I walked away even more determined; I wanted to set the bar high for the rest of my undergraduate work. I wrote three more versions. In the end, I received an A+ and an honors credit. I learned an incredible amount in the course of constructing those twelve pages, not only about writing, gender roles, or my passion for learning, but also about diligence and strong work ethic and how those things can determine the measure of one’s success.
Throughout college, I learned that my success level was often positively correlated with my amount of passion for the particular subject or activity. Because I was passionate about beautiful celebrations and utterly obsessed with organization, I pursued a career in event design and planning. During my years in the creative industry, I was constantly amazed by the sheer ingenuity and creative ability of the human mind. I witnessed a bare terrace transform into breathtaking “underwater” dining room. With my imagination as my guide, I constructed dazzling environments and cultural experiences, transporting guests from a green lawn to a Moroccan palace. In the September of 2010, alongside my team, I designed and coordinated a stunning wedding. It received numerous recognitions in the press. Unfortunately, another designer, who had been brought on last minute as a helping hand, felt that she could claim the event as her own, because she was better known in the public sphere. No one questioned her, and our designs became attributed to her as the original credits became filtered and diluted through social media streams. The incredible frustration of having another person claim my creative work as their property made me realize that the ideas and products of the human mind are invaluable and must be protected. I came to recognize that intellectual property law would allow me to actively work towards protecting humanity’s most valuable asset: imagination. My time in the creative industry served to foster my respect for human creativity, and developed my passion for protecting it.
Ultimately, I believe attitude, learning experiences, and passions shape who we are and who we have the potential to become. The course of my life experience has led me to believe that I am meant to pursue, and am an excellent candidate for, the study of law. Utilizing my unique perspectives and creative background, I will engage in the study and practice of law with passion and determination, striving for excellence. It is my hope to do so at XXX Law School.
