Anyone willing to read my first draft? Forum

[Mel003]

Thanks for the feedback you all

[bee's vision]

"presume my interest" -- this makes no sense, maybe you meant resume learning? why not just say continue studying?

"challenges that I have prevailed make "- have overcome?


"helping people find justice." I would take this out, too cliche

There's a lot of grammar issues but that's understandable considering english is your second language, i find it kind of charming actually. As for the narrative, i would talk more about your experiences in the Business Law association and volunteering and what you learned and how far you've come since not even knowing the language.

[Mel003]

Thank you for your feedback

[CanadianWolf]

Critique sent via PM.

[vanwinkle]

Attention OP:

"Do not like the critisism. Please remove it." is not a valid use of the report feature. Please stop misusing it. If you ask for criticism here, you should expect to receive it.