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(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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CalyssaT

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Post by CalyssaT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 3:18 am

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Last edited by CalyssaT on Sun Jul 01, 2012 9:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PinkCow

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by PinkCow » Fri Jan 21, 2011 3:30 am

Sounds swell to me. I think if you make sure to present a unifying theme (e.g., your inner drive that led you to succeed at a, b, and c despite x, y, and z), then I wouldn't think it would be too scattered. It's all in the writing, but I say you have some good ideas flowing. Post it if you want more specific feedback.

CalyssaT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by CalyssaT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 3:35 am

Thank you for the prompt reply! I appreciate your encouragement. Let me do a little more work on it and might post soon. :)

mala2

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by mala2 » Fri Jan 21, 2011 4:20 am

chip3341 wrote:Sounds swell to me. I think if you make sure to present a unifying theme (e.g., your inner drive that led you to succeed at a, b, and c despite x, y, and z), then I wouldn't think it would be too scattered. It's all in the writing, but I say you have some good ideas flowing. Post it if you want more specific feedback.
thanks that really helps me too, I've been trying to figure out how to unify my essay more. It's actually similar to yours OP! if you pm it to me we can swap

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Mattfl88

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by Mattfl88 » Fri Jan 21, 2011 12:48 pm

It seems like you will have plenty to write about and most likely a very interesting and inspiring story. Like the others said figure out a theme and shape your stories and support around that. (That seems to be the biggest problem I'm having).

Good luck and I look forward to possibly reading it.

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CalyssaT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by CalyssaT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 1:12 pm

Mattfl88 wrote:It seems like you will have plenty to write about and most likely a very interesting and inspiring story. Like the others said figure out a theme and shape your stories and support around that. (That seems to be the biggest problem I'm having).

Good luck and I look forward to possibly reading it.
Thanks for your input! Mine's definitely a work in progress - haven't quite developed all the paragraphs I plan to use yet, but I'll be working on it more this afternoon.

Would you want to swap? I am finding out how helpful this can be. It's so nice to have someone else in the same situation take a look at it. Outsiders just don't understand...ha. PM me if you want! :)

DaveMT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by DaveMT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 6:11 pm

"how I was able to find the drive within myself to do better and want better for myself despite no support/expectations from my family"

If you can write your statement about the desire and drive it will be captivating and interesting. I am struggling with that as well and need to work my statement over to develop the idea of what "drives" a person to achieve. sounds like you have a great life experience to draw from.

I suggest that you just start throwing it on a page. Develop the ideas you like...that you think will work and then go from there.

Cheers,

Dave

You can read and/or critique my statement...it's posted near yours in the main menu

CalyssaT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by CalyssaT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 6:47 pm

DaveMT wrote:"how I was able to find the drive within myself to do better and want better for myself despite no support/expectations from my family"

If you can write your statement about the desire and drive it will be captivating and interesting. I am struggling with that as well and need to work my statement over to develop the idea of what "drives" a person to achieve. sounds like you have a great life experience to draw from.

I suggest that you just start throwing it on a page. Develop the ideas you like...that you think will work and then go from there.

Cheers,

Dave

You can read and/or critique my statement...it's posted near yours in the main menu
Thank you for your comments! This is really helpful just knowing someone find my ideas interesting, ha. I just haven't looked at my experiences/life as being much to talk about but I think it's really important to let the schools know where you're coming from and what has brought you to this point. Every person has their own story and I think it just takes some reflection/examination to be able to relate it in a statement. Trying to do that...

I am going to read your PS now :)

Thanks again!

DaveMT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by DaveMT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 7:07 pm

CalyssaT,

Yes,
Currently working on my second statement and it is tough getting started on the second. One statement is a lot, two is brutal. Nonetheless, I am working on this prompt: (which I think is nice because it is specific.)

The first statement should describe the applicant’s interest in the study and practice of law and in the University of whateva School of Law.

I think I will develop the idea of what drives me into the running essay as running long distances like law school is nuts. Or, they are both really difficult long paths that require lots of effort. Kind of like overcoming difficulties in life such as you are writing about.

good luck and thanks for the feedback. (working on the grammaticals etc.)

Dave

CalyssaT

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Re: PS Thoughts?

Post by CalyssaT » Fri Jan 21, 2011 7:20 pm

Sounds good! I like your comparison of marathons to law school. Definitely something you could go off of...

Yeah, 2 essays for me too. The diversity statement is optional but I'm working on that too just to hopefully add more dimension to my application. Kind of like I said above, I'm thinking about just writing about my (in my mind, ordinary) experiences growing up in an extremely small town and just some of the day-to-day parts of my life back then that are strikingly different from where/who I am now. My hometown (in another state) had less than 3,000 people and now I live in Phoenix, LOL. Would you want to read a story about that?! I am kind of just playing up the small-ness and showing how I appreciate my upbringing there, but now... on to bigger & better things.

any ideas? :P

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