Feedback on my ps please Forum

[screenname123456789]

revised it

[orangebluewhitered]

It's a little bland, it has unnecessary detail that doesn't add interest or value to the narrative. I'd streamline it a little and add some interesting detail that shows more insight into what's happening.

just one tutor to assist them. That tutor being me.

--> just one tutor to assist them: Me.

I, expecting some sort of generic response, was caught slightly off guard when he told me, “I e

Running into this former student had quite the impression on me.

Show, not tell.

[screenname123456789]

Thanks for your help