BYU Personal Statement Forum

[PinkCow]

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[justcap]

Umm. Ok. Sounds great.

[InLikeFlint]

I got a fee waiver from BYU and, while I'm not really interested in attending, I put out a call for personal statements on Facebook asking specifically for advice on a fitting statement for a Mormon school. I received this humdinger a few hours later:




While my personal story of growth is unique and fraught with heartwarming stories of inner turmoil and personal development, all that I am and will be is driven by the teachings of one man my best friend, Joseph Smith.

Through his teachings I have learned to respect my fellow man and about many unique events in history that cannot be corroborated by any other sources. When I was in a very dark time in my life his book helped me come to terms with my individuality and the dangers of caffeine. The most important lesson that I learned from Joseph Smith though was how to quickly change a tire while being pursued by a band of homophobic rednecks on highway 98 in Southern Alabama last Christmas. I am sure that if it wasn’t for his quick work with that wrench we would both be stuffed next to an Alligator in a rundown shack in the Everglades.

Yes, I remember the first time I met Joseph. I had “accidentally” stumbled into boys town in Recede while searching for a new sweater for my minature poodle. He was wearing a red cowboy hat and matching knee high cowboy boots while dancing to Mika’s “Lollipop,” I immediately knew that there was much I could Learn from Joseph Smith and arranged to have a fresh Zima sent to him right away. It was only later that I learned that he was co author, with the legendary Tobias Funke, of my favorite book “The Man Inside Me.” The rest of out story is history, we plan on going to Vermont to make things official this fall.

I want to assure you that my time will not be spent Idly while I attend BYULS. I promise to spend every waking moment spreading the knowledge of Joseph Smith’s teachings and works across campus. By now I am sure you have perused my transcripts and know that my academic record and achievements are exceptional for someone my age. The point that I want to drive home though is that if I am accepted into Brigham Young Law School you will not only be getting me but also Joseph Smith and he throws one hell of a pool party.

If you have a fee waive I would definitely send that in. I really wanted to send in a flame app, but I didn't want to spend $80 on a joke. If you don't get in, you can always tell yourself you were YPed