Could someone help me work on this sentence? Forum

[Steppinchoi]

-Thanks guys!

[HopefulFish]

the semi colon does not belong there. use it when you have an independent clause to follow it.

[OmbreGracieuse]

I think you should move the word delicate, it seems out of place and instead say something like " I discovered a deep interest in delicate issues such as the struggle between..."

I am not sure what you mean by 'in the same poor countries' so I am guessing it ties in with the rest of your statement. This sentence alone though, I would take out 'the same' ('the testing of novel treatments in poor countries')

Since I am sure it ties in with the rest of your PS, I think it fits. All things aside, I think your sentence flows well (despite its length) and is easy to follow. Still, personally, I'd move 'delicate' over. It just reads easier to me that way, but that is just IMO.

Good luck!!

[Steppinchoi]

I would take out "deep" and just say an interest. Unless you want to say you are deeply interested, it sounds weird to have "discovered" a deep interest.

Also I'm not sure about "provisions of". Are you interested in producing medical break throughs or the provisions?

the semi colon does not belong there. use it when you have an independent clause to follow it.

I was using the semi-colon as a separator for a list. My only concern was that I only listed 2 reasons, so I don't know if this constitutes a "list". I feel like things would get really complicated if I replaced it with a comma instead; especially because the list items already contain commas