Your honest opinion please. 3rd draft Forum

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mrwarre85

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Your honest opinion please. 3rd draft

Post by mrwarre85 » Tue Oct 19, 2010 1:23 pm

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Last edited by mrwarre85 on Thu Apr 26, 2012 11:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

asoli

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Re: Your honest opinion please. 3rd draft

Post by asoli » Tue Oct 19, 2010 1:32 pm

I would get rid of the first and last paragraph because it feels like you're letting one line from someone famous define your entire existence. I would also try to enhance your reasoning for attending law school because it doesn't seem genuine.

I could be completely off base with this, but it's just my honest opinion after reading your PS.

mrwarre85

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Re: Your honest opinion please. 3rd draft

Post by mrwarre85 » Tue Oct 19, 2010 2:43 pm

asoli wrote:I would get rid of the first and last paragraph because it feels like you're letting one line from someone famous define your entire existence.
Correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like you are saying that the quote doesn't intergrate into the paper well. I feel the same way as it is now--- I may just leave that in there for my application to Cornell.

Ok thanks for the advice about my reasoning for law school. Reading it again it certainly doesn't jump off the page as a very good, well reasoned desire.

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