Final PS draft. Pls give me your final thoughts/critiques!! Forum
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lalalawya
- Posts: 321
- Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:34 pm
Final PS draft. Pls give me your final thoughts/critiques!!
DELETED.
Last edited by lalalawya on Sun Oct 17, 2010 3:49 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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lalalawya
- Posts: 321
- Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:34 pm
Re: Final PS draft. Pls give me your final thoughts/critiques!!
Also, please do not quote my whole PS (or, significant parts). I plan on taking it down after hearing comments. Thanks so much!
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WhatSarahSaid
- Posts: 293
- Joined: Tue Jun 02, 2009 2:01 pm
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CanadianWolf
- Posts: 11453
- Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:54 pm
Re: Final PS draft. Pls give me your final thoughts/critiques!!
Pretty good, except for the last two sentences of your essay.
CONSIDER DELETING: "...a school whose program is exceptional...".
"Having experienced working in two different careers" doesn't make sense unless you have been working for over twenty or thirty years.
CONSIDER: "occupations" instead of "careers".
CONSIDER DELETING: "...a school whose program is exceptional...".
"Having experienced working in two different careers" doesn't make sense unless you have been working for over twenty or thirty years.
CONSIDER: "occupations" instead of "careers".
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lalalawya
- Posts: 321
- Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:34 pm
Re: Final PS draft. Pls give me your final thoughts/critiques!!
Thank you so much for both of your comments. If you guys are applying this cycle, GOOD LUCK! If not, thanks for your help. 
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