(Personal Statement Examples, Advice, Critique, . . . )
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ArchRoark

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by ArchRoark » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:28 am
People have been giving me conflicting advice on this. One editor adamantly is sure that it is "affect change" -- I just recently sent my final draft to a few people and one responded that I should change it to "effect change." Google responses seems to be equally all over the spectrum.
I believe I can begin to affect change on the institutional level.
This phrasing seems to be more common and is used all over the internet.
I believe I can begin to effect change on the institutional level.
Last edited by
ArchRoark on Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
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anli

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by anli » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:36 am
You affect institutions. You effect change.
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Zugzwang

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by Zugzwang » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:38 am
inchoate_con wrote:affect
You are so wrong it's hilarious.
To answer the OP's question. What are you trying to say? Do you want to bring about change, or do you want to change the change.
Last edited by
Zugzwang on Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:39 am, edited 1 time in total.
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stratocophic

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by stratocophic » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:38 am
anli wrote:You affect institutions. You effect change.
TITCR. Small sample size, but based on the poll, maybe TLS isn't as smart as it thinks it is -_-
Edit: nm. Evidently the rest of the grammar nazis were slow in getting to the poll.
Last edited by
stratocophic on Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:39 am, edited 1 time in total.
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MrKappus

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by MrKappus » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:39 am
The editor of adamantine conviction is an idiot. Also, I respect your desire to seek truth, but do you own a dictionary?
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ArchRoark

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by ArchRoark » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:47 am
Zugzwang wrote:
To answer the OP's question. What are you trying to say? Do you want to bring about change, or do you want to change the change.
Former yah
MrKappus wrote:The editor of adamantine conviction is an idiot. Also, I respect your desire to seek truth, but do you own a dictionary?
Yup, obviously I am bad at grammar or I wouldn't of posted this thread. I always thought effect was to be used as a noun. I guess there are instances were it can be used as a verb.
effect
–verb (used with object)
10.
to produce as an effect; bring about; accomplish; make happen: The new machines finally effected the transition to computerized accounting last spring.
affect
–verb (used with object)
1.
to act on; produce an effect or change in: Cold weather affected the crops.
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DreamShake

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by DreamShake » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:48 am
Merriam Webster basically answers your question in its definition of "affect":
"b : to act upon (as a person or a person's mind or feelings) so as to effect a response : influence"
The people who are telling you that the applicable word is "affect" need to stop advising others on matters of which they are evidently wholly ignorant. Never question my grammar Nazi authority!
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2ofspades

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by 2ofspades » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:53 am
DreamShake wrote:The people who are telling you that the applicable word is "affect" need to stop advising others on matters of which they are evidently wholly ignorant.
But the three posters who voted "affect" are going to become lawyers...
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MrKappus

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by MrKappus » Tue Aug 31, 2010 1:13 am
2ofspades wrote:DreamShake wrote:The people who are telling you that the applicable word is "affect" need to stop advising others on matters of which they are evidently wholly ignorant.
But the three posters who voted "affect" are going to become lawyers...
I guess somebody has to populate the undesirable mode in the bimodal distribution.
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DreamShake

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by DreamShake » Tue Aug 31, 2010 1:14 am
I guess somebody has to replace Clarence Thomas someday...
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Ford Prefect

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by Ford Prefect » Tue Aug 31, 2010 1:43 am
Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
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stratocophic

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by stratocophic » Tue Aug 31, 2010 2:11 am
mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'd go with more of a desire to effect change - e.g. "I want to effect change on the institutional level by/I would like to effect change on the institutional level by" or even "I intend to effect change on the institutional level by"
IMO making it a sure, definitive statement seems a little trite/presumptuous... I'd go with earnest, noobish determination.
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ArchRoark

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by ArchRoark » Tue Aug 31, 2010 2:14 am
mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
I just posted one part of the sentence. It is supported in the full sentence.
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Ford Prefect

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by Ford Prefect » Tue Aug 31, 2010 2:21 am
stratocophic wrote:mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'd go with more of a desire to effect change - e.g. "I want to effect change on the institutional level by/I would like to effect change on the institutional level by" or even "I intend to effect change on the institutional level by"
IMO making it a sure, definitive statement seems a little trite/presumptuous... I'd go with earnest, noobish determination.
In this instance I'd agree with you, especially not knowing much more about the OP's personal statement. OP could even stick with the "I believe" statement so long as it is followed with how that change will happen.
In general, though, I don't think making a definitive statement is presumptuous, so long as it backed with facts.
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CanadianWolf

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by CanadianWolf » Tue Aug 31, 2010 10:21 am
Zugzwang is correct, in my opinion. Essentially to "effect" change is to bring about change; whereas to "affect" change is to influence or alter a "change" that has already occurred. The answer to the OP's question, therefore, depends upon the intended meaning of the sentence using either word.
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ArchRoark

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by ArchRoark » Tue Aug 31, 2010 11:50 am
CanadianWolf wrote:Zugzwang is correct, in my opinion. Essentially to "effect" change is to bring about change; whereas to "affect" change is to influence or alter a "change" that has already occurred. The answer to the OP's question, therefore, depends upon the intended meaning of the sentence using either word.
Yah I intended to mean that I wanted to bring about change. When I explained this to my original editor friend he agreed with all the grammar nazis on this website. Originally he thought I intended to convey that I want to influence the existing change taking place in these institutions.
CanadianWolf - On a completely side note, after speaking with a number of other I decided to rid my DS of the bigot reference. I basically just changed it to "some people."
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NayBoer

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by NayBoer » Tue Aug 31, 2010 11:52 am
Tiva wrote:CanadianWolf wrote:Zugzwang is correct, in my opinion. Essentially to "effect" change is to bring about change; whereas to "affect" change is to influence or alter a "change" that has already occurred. The answer to the OP's question, therefore, depends upon the intended meaning of the sentence using either word.
Yah I intended to mean that I wanted to bring about change. When I explained this to my original editor friend he agreed with all the grammar nazis on this website. Originally he thought I intended to convey that I want to influence the existing change taking place in these institutions.
CanadianWolf - On a completely side note, after speaking with a number of other I decided to rid my DS of the bigot reference. I basically just changed it to "some people."
Sounds like he's covering his ass.
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Dany

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by Dany » Tue Aug 31, 2010 11:56 am
mdallavis wrote:stratocophic wrote:mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'd go with more of a desire to effect change - e.g. "I want to effect change on the institutional level by/I would like to effect change on the institutional level by" or even "I intend to effect change on the institutional level by"
IMO making it a sure, definitive statement seems a little trite/presumptuous... I'd go with earnest, noobish determination.
In this instance I'd agree with you, especially not knowing much more about the OP's personal statement. OP could even stick with the "I believe" statement so long as it is followed with how that change will happen.
In general, though, I don't think making a definitive statement is presumptuous, so long as it backed with facts.
"I believe" and "I think" sound really, really terrible in personal statements, in my opinion. It sounds wishy-washy and like a 6th grade opinion paper. Definitive statements sound more mature and well thought-out.
There are some cases where it might sound better to have "I believe" or "I think" but in general, I think* people just aren't used to being self-assured or writing with a specific purpose. Also, "I want" sounds much better.
*Like right here, for example.
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ArchRoark

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by ArchRoark » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:01 pm
NayBoer wrote:Sounds like he's covering his ass.
Perhaps
However, in the context of my PS, it could be argued to work both ways. There is certainly already a change having taken place.
eskimo wrote:mdallavis wrote:stratocophic wrote:mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'd go with more of a desire to effect change - e.g. "I want to effect change on the institutional level by/I would like to effect change on the institutional level by" or even "I intend to effect change on the institutional level by"
IMO making it a sure, definitive statement seems a little trite/presumptuous... I'd go with earnest, noobish determination.
In this instance I'd agree with you, especially not knowing much more about the OP's personal statement. OP could even stick with the "I believe" statement so long as it is followed with how that change will happen.
In general, though, I don't think making a definitive statement is presumptuous, so long as it backed with facts.
"I believe" and "I think" sound really, really terrible in personal statements, in my opinion. It sounds wishy-washy and like a 6th grade opinion paper. Definitive statements sound more mature and well thought-out.
There are some cases where it might sound better to have "I believe" or "I think" but in general, I think* people just aren't used to being self-assured or writing with a specific purpose. Also, "I want" sounds much better.
*Like right here, for example.
I guess I will go ahead and post the full sentence. I agree that the sentence as posted originally is pretty elementary. I feel that it works fine as written in my paper. If you guys have any suggestions on strengthening the sentence then please comment. Dropping the "I believe" seems too absolute/idealistic/naive to me.
By working to expand the use of these courts, I believe I can begin to effect change on the institutional level.
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NayBoer

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by NayBoer » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:03 pm
I think that's pretty clear cut, but I didn't read the sentence before it or after it.
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esq

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by esq » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:04 pm
I've never completely understood where this usage of effect change comes from, but you are looking for an outcome, or to create change. Not to affect, act upon, change. This link should make it a little more clear:
http://www.wsu.edu/~brians/errors/affect.html
And lol at the Clarence Thomas reference, I can't stop laughing about it.
Oh, and I think that it should be "at the institutional level," not "on."
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Ford Prefect

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by Ford Prefect » Tue Aug 31, 2010 12:16 pm
eskimo wrote:mdallavis wrote:stratocophic wrote:mdallavis wrote:Also, saying "I believe..." (or "I think..." for that matter) is weak.
Make it a strong statement of fact, not a wishy-washy opinion. And back it up - why do you KNOW you can effect change?
That's just what I think.
Maybe it's a personal thing, but I'd go with more of a desire to effect change - e.g. "I want to effect change on the institutional level by/I would like to effect change on the institutional level by" or even "I intend to effect change on the institutional level by"
IMO making it a sure, definitive statement seems a little trite/presumptuous... I'd go with earnest, noobish determination.
In this instance I'd agree with you, especially not knowing much more about the OP's personal statement. OP could even stick with the "I believe" statement so long as it is followed with how that change will happen.
In general, though, I don't think making a definitive statement is presumptuous, so long as it backed with facts.
"I believe" and "I think" sound really, really terrible in personal statements, in my opinion. It sounds wishy-washy and like a 6th grade opinion paper. Definitive statements sound more mature and well thought-out.
There are some cases where it might sound better to have "I believe" or "I think" but in general, I think* people just aren't used to being self-assured or writing with a specific purpose. Also, "I want" sounds much better.
*Like right here, for example.
Yeah!
Also, OP, if we were real Grammar Nazis, you'd be dead by now.
Seriously? What are you waiting for?
Now there's a charge.
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