Very first draft! Hobby/passion essay... Forum

[piccolittle]

Back to the drawing board...

[NonTradHealthLaw]

Your punctuation errors disallowed me from progressing beyond the 2nd paragraph. Possible potential, but needs a lot of editing.

[piccolittle]

Your punctuation errors disallowed me from progressing beyond the 2nd paragraph. Possible potential, but needs a lot of editing.

Ouch. Punctuation errors... as in comma overuse?

[NonTradHealthLaw]

Actually, underuse and misuse. And, I lied. I made it, initially, to approximately halfway through the third paragraph before punctuation stopped me from progressing. Now I've read through the rest and it reminds me of my mother's romance novels-melodramatic and overwrought. Sorry to have such a violent reaction against your essay, OP, but this one rubbed me the wrong way throughout.