Alright, so I've been attempting to write something that may become either my Yale 250 or my PS. I'm having a bit of trouble working with one particular sentence:
"It’s a cool March night in Xi’an; Joe-bob, his cousin Xue, his grandfather, and I are sitting around the dining room table playing mahjong. It’s become a bit of a tradition for the few days we’ve been here."
I'm not sure if I need to clarify who Joe-bob is, or if that's not really important since he's only mentioned in the context of playing the mahjong game (I wasn't sure if saying "my boyfriend, his cousin, and his grandfather..." would be helpful for clarification or if adcoms are just going to be all "lolz we don't care about your bf").
Any thoughts? :/
Question about sentence in PS Forum
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BarnabeSpooge
- Posts: 73
- Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2010 9:19 pm
Re: Question about sentence in PS
Personally, "my boyfriend, his cousin, and his grandfather..." actually gives me an idea of WTF you're talking about.
