Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern Forum
- Triveal
- Posts: 82
- Joined: Sun Sep 25, 2011 1:54 am
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
The answer to this is completely, 100% dependent on your relationship with your girlfriend, which nobody on this site can even begin to evaluate for you. It's a tough, shitty decision either way. Good luck.
-
- Posts: 18203
- Joined: Wed Oct 14, 2009 10:47 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
I'd agree with the wait a couple years advice. If your GF is still in school, you won't know where she ends up. What if she gets some dream job in NYC after you just took an SA in Boston?
Either cut her loose, or wait until you can have definitive plans.
Either cut her loose, or wait until you can have definitive plans.
-
- Posts: 108
- Joined: Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:13 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
I think the waiting advice is credited. Law school takes a toll on relationships and if you're not already married I think it would be a mistake to choose a law school based on the relationship.
-
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:14 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
Once again, thanks for all the replies!
To the people that say wait, I've already waited a full year for her. Applied last cycle and sat out to see if this relationship will work (it has, better than I could have hoped). I'm already close to 30 and I don't think law schools would think I was very committed if I had applied 3 straight cycles to pull all my applications at the last minute. I think waiting would be ideal..if I hadn't already done it for a year.
To the people that say we're not that serious because I don't want to do a long distance relationship, I would contend that the exact opposite is true. What percentage of long distance relationships last in law school? 5% maybe? Probably less. Why would I want to induce that kind of trauma to our relationship? I believe that we could succeed, but I am not foolish/delusional enough to bank on that fact when the odds are so stacked against any long distance relationships in law school. I also care about her enough not to want to induce her to that kind of shitty lifestyle for 2+ years even though it would obviously be wayyy better for my career prospects.
Any other input is greatly valued. I am taking all of your comments to heart!
To the people that say wait, I've already waited a full year for her. Applied last cycle and sat out to see if this relationship will work (it has, better than I could have hoped). I'm already close to 30 and I don't think law schools would think I was very committed if I had applied 3 straight cycles to pull all my applications at the last minute. I think waiting would be ideal..if I hadn't already done it for a year.
To the people that say we're not that serious because I don't want to do a long distance relationship, I would contend that the exact opposite is true. What percentage of long distance relationships last in law school? 5% maybe? Probably less. Why would I want to induce that kind of trauma to our relationship? I believe that we could succeed, but I am not foolish/delusional enough to bank on that fact when the odds are so stacked against any long distance relationships in law school. I also care about her enough not to want to induce her to that kind of shitty lifestyle for 2+ years even though it would obviously be wayyy better for my career prospects.
Any other input is greatly valued. I am taking all of your comments to heart!
-
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:14 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
yeah, this. I think they're both amazing opportunities but I'm probably going to be at least a little unhappy with either choice.Triveal wrote:The answer to this is completely, 100% dependent on your relationship with your girlfriend, which nobody on this site can even begin to evaluate for you. It's a tough, shitty decision either way. Good luck.
Want to continue reading?
Register now to search topics and post comments!
Absolutely FREE!
Already a member? Login
- The Platypus
- Posts: 48
- Joined: Fri Jul 27, 2012 8:59 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
So, what happens after law school when you guys get initial employment offers in two different cities? Why do you think the long-distance problems are going to be over after law school? You can't be sure where you will find a job, nor where she will find one. So, even if you go to BU you might just be pushing this big crisis decision down the road. You have to think about how this relationship is really going to work--of course there's going to be sacrifices, but are you going to be the one making them all the time?Starboy wrote: To the people that say we're not that serious because I don't want to do a long distance relationship, I would contend that the exact opposite is true. What percentage of long distance relationships last in law school? 5% maybe? Probably less. Why would I want to induce that kind of trauma to our relationship? I believe that we could succeed, but I am not foolish/delusional enough to bank on that fact when the odds are so stacked against any long distance relationships in law school.
You're banking BU off one city (obviously somewhat financial). But if Boston ends up not being the city that works for both hers and your employment prospects, you just spent three years of your life at a lesser school. Opportunity cost. My two cents. Not a fun decision however way you slice it. I hope things work out whichever way you choose though.
-
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:14 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
^^^
good point.
good point.
-
- Posts: 11444
- Joined: Wed Mar 24, 2010 4:54 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
Whether you handle this as a personal decision or a professional decision, it's a decision that only you can make.
Northwestern makes more sense professionally.
BU may offer a larger scholarship if you withdraw in order to attend NU.
It is a bit troubling that you don't care for Boston. If the relationship sours, you'll have a lot to be upset about.
Northwestern makes more sense professionally.
BU may offer a larger scholarship if you withdraw in order to attend NU.
It is a bit troubling that you don't care for Boston. If the relationship sours, you'll have a lot to be upset about.
-
- Posts: 12
- Joined: Fri Aug 10, 2012 10:14 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
I chose NU. I guess I will be joining the angsty, overstressed malcontents on TLS for the next 3 years now
Thanks once again for all of the advice, and wish me luck in the horrendous long distance relationship that is to come!
Thanks once again for all of the advice, and wish me luck in the horrendous long distance relationship that is to come!
- Samara
- Posts: 3238
- Joined: Wed May 11, 2011 4:26 pm
Re: Help me Choose - BU staying close to gf or Northwestern
Join us! We'll wallow in your angst with you.Starboy wrote:I chose NU. I guess I will be joining the angsty, overstressed malcontents on TLS for the next 3 years now
Thanks once again for all of the advice, and wish me luck in the horrendous long distance relationship that is to come!
Seriously though, a lot of us at NU are married or in committed relationships and we're a pretty friendly bunch. We'll help you get through it.
Register now!
Resources to assist law school applicants, students & graduates.
It's still FREE!
Already a member? Login