Which clients are notoriously terrible to work for? Forum

[Anonymous User]

Yes, we are a customer service industry but some customers are better than others.

[Anonymous User]

On a general level, HF and PE are notoriously bad. Investment banks surprisingly okay.

[Anonymous User]

In lit, Walmart will nickel & dime you over every claimed hour and expense. The federal government, forgetaboutit, be prepared to justify every single time entry and explain why you took an uber to your appellate oral arguments as opposed to waiting 15 minutes for a public city bus (not joking). IMHO, thses clients are not worth the hassle.

[Anonymous User]

On a general level, HF and PE are notoriously bad. Investment banks surprisingly okay.

Agree with the IB assessment. For me, PE, or at least the big PE firms, are pretty good. However, distressed debt oriented PE firms can contain annoying personalities.

[Anonymous User]

In lit, Walmart will nickel & dime you over every claimed hour and expense. The federal government, forgetaboutit, be prepared to justify every single time entry and explain why you took an uber to your appellate oral arguments as opposed to waiting 15 minutes for a public city bus (not joking). IMHO, thses clients are not worth the hassle.

I’ve actually had great experiences working for Walmart - their in house counsel are generally nice, responsive, and easy to work with. (They are cheap but at least they are transparent about it.)

My least favorite institutional client of all time is a tech company that starts with the letter A.

[Anonymous User]

I have found there is more variance between managers/pocs than between the clients.

That said, I have been miserable on every Apollo engagement. It’s not just me either. On a particularly awful 6 months engagement, half of my team left the firm.

[Anonymous User]

In lit, Walmart will nickel & dime you over every claimed hour and expense. The federal government, forgetaboutit, be prepared to justify every single time entry and explain why you took an uber to your appellate oral arguments as opposed to waiting 15 minutes for a public city bus (not joking). IMHO, thses clients are not worth the hassle.

I’ve actually had great experiences working for Walmart - their in house counsel are generally nice, responsive, and easy to work with. (They are cheap but at least they are transparent about it.)

My least favorite institutional client of all time is a tech company that starts with the letter A.

Fruit or body of water?

[Anonymous User]

In lit, Walmart will nickel & dime you over every claimed hour and expense. The federal government, forgetaboutit, be prepared to justify every single time entry and explain why you took an uber to your appellate oral arguments as opposed to waiting 15 minutes for a public city bus (not joking). IMHO, thses clients are not worth the hassle.

I’ve actually had great experiences working for Walmart - their in house counsel are generally nice, responsive, and easy to work with. (They are cheap but at least they are transparent about it.)

My least favorite institutional client of all time is a tech company that starts with the letter A.

Fruit or body of water?

Or language system letter set?

[Anonymous User]

Putting aside insurers (who, as a rule, are satanic and the embodiment of evil), a pharmaceutical company rhyming with K&K has some truly brutal in-house lawyers who will micromanage you to death, and that's not even talking about their billing guide.

[Anonymous User]

Yes, we are a customer service industry but some customers are better than others.

A certain insurance company that rhymes with Frighthouse Binancial, or at least one in-house lawyer who micromanages the case to death and creates endless, unnecessary make work, including dreadful hour long calls twice a week, requiring several discovery and case trackers to be filled out in extremely granular detail and be circulated multiple times a week, and basically requires daily reports on the case. JFC.

[Anonymous User]

Roark is the only client that stands out as uniquely terrible.

Cerberus, Apollo - both of them were actually surprisingly pleasant to work with. I worked with a few other sponsors - all of whom were nice enough. As far as things go, I generally enjoyed my BigLaw days / deals.

But, Roark... Everyone there needs everything "as soon as humanly possible". I drafted a credit agreement over Christmas one year. We got comments 3ish weeks later from the lender on a Friday night (around 8pm). Roark responds, "Thx. ETA on issues list? Would like to discuss tonight, or at the latest, tomorrow morning." I read somewhere that their GC intentionally likes to have calls late at night or on weekend, because "the other side is more likely to give up on their points". And they micromanage everything (need updated checklists everyday, etc.)

And even with all that - I don't think their returns have been particularly good?

[Lacepiece23]

I get that everyone is Anon in this thread but I think an admin should lock it.

[Anonymous User]

Roark is the only client that stands out as uniquely terrible.

Cerberus, Apollo - both of them were actually surprisingly pleasant to work with. I worked with a few other sponsors - all of whom were nice enough. As far as things go, I generally enjoyed my BigLaw days / deals.

But, Roark... Everyone there needs everything "as soon as humanly possible". I drafted a credit agreement over Christmas one year. We got comments 3ish weeks later from the lender on a Friday night (around 8pm). Roark responds, "Thx. ETA on issues list? Would like to discuss tonight, or at the latest, tomorrow morning." I read somewhere that their GC intentionally likes to have calls late at night or on weekend, because "the other side is more likely to give up on their points". And they micromanage everything (need updated checklists everyday, etc.)

And even with all that - I don't think their returns have been particularly good?

Second this - there are some hilarious S.A. stories involving this client. Roark is absolutely insane. God bless the legions of P,W associates forming merger subs at 3am on Saturday and adding Kirkland-esque off-market nonsense to every NDA and leading off with 50 year restrictive covenant agreements.

[Anonymous User]

On a general level, HF and PE are notoriously bad. Investment banks surprisingly okay.

I'll echo this. Never really had a bad client until I represented a PE firm. Zero idea of what a realistic timeline is, will expect you to do everything for them without giving you any input, and in general just acts like a lawyer is their slave. But the partners love them because they seem to have no concept of money and just spend it like water, happily paying the obscene bills we give them.

[Anonymous User]

On a general level, HF and PE are notoriously bad. Investment banks surprisingly okay.

I'll echo this. Never really had a bad client until I represented a PE firm. Zero idea of what a realistic timeline is, will expect you to do everything for them without giving you any input, and in general just acts like a lawyer is their slave. But the partners love them because they seem to have no concept of money and just spend it like water, happily paying the obscene bills we give them.

Its cause the PE firms clients pay the bills haha.

But in all fairness being on the other side of the fence, if there isn't a GC or an actual lawyer working on the PE firms side of the things the issue tends to be relatively poor training on legal terms for mid-levels combined with really heavy hours on deal teams for PE firms so they are working similar hours you are.

[nealric]

I get that everyone is Anon in this thread but I think an admin should lock it.

The posters here are all adults. If they want to provide their opinions on clients, it's not our job to protect them from any consequences.

[Lacepiece23]

I get that everyone is Anon in this thread but I think an admin should lock it.

The posters here are all adults. If they want to provide their opinions on clients, it's not our job to protect them from any consequences.

Kind of seems like a direct violation of the rules of professional conduct but whatever.

[nealric]

I get that everyone is Anon in this thread but I think an admin should lock it.

The posters here are all adults. If they want to provide their opinions on clients, it's not our job to protect them from any consequences.

Kind of seems like a direct violation of the rules of professional conduct but whatever.

If it is, enforcement is a job for the bars of their respective states.

[Anonymous User]

I have found there is more variance between managers/pocs than between the clients.

That said, I have been miserable on every Apollo engagement. It’s not just me either. On a particularly awful 6 months engagement, half of my team left the firm.

Got staffed on an Apollo OpCo client two weeks after this post. First call amounted to Apollo asking us to accelerate timeline and start hand over to their in house ASAP.

Second call was them complaining about the separation agreement making it impossible for them to cut OPEX and they want us to find a way out.

We didn’t draft the agreement. We have no leverage whatsoever.

I hate this client. They constantly pressure people to move quickly and cheaply and end up accumulating a bunch of legal/tech debt that ends up making everything difficult.

I am sure by the end of this staffing, I will have left a bunch of landmines for the next unfortunate soul.