How I imagine many small firm interviews

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justonemoregame
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How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby justonemoregame » Tue Sep 27, 2011 4:22 pm

Recruiter: So, college football coming up derpa soon.

Candidate: Derpa yeah, I’m a pretty big fan. (takes drink) Derp.

R: Yeah derpa, me, too derpa derpa. I’m a Derpa State fan.

C: Derpa State? Oh wow, they’ve got a pretty derpa schedule this year. If they can get past Derpa Tech in week 3, they’ve got a pretty good shot at getting
all the way to the Derpa Championship.

R: I derp so. It’s gonna be a little tougher around here huh?

C: Oh derp. We got the derpin’ DerpDevils in week 2 and have to travel all the way out to Derpville to play the DerpCats the week after that.

R: Well, I guess these derp grades are gonna be derpin’ down a little derper in 2L huh!

C: derpa derpa derpa! yeah heheheh (takes drink) Derp. So are there a lot of derp fans at the office?

R: Ah derp yeah. Pretty much everybody except for Poindexter, but you don’t have to worry about him. He works alone. In fact, derpa, he was the only partner who tried to derp our plans for the 55” derp screen in the conference room.

C: Derp screen in the conference room?

R: Yer derpin’ right.

C: Derpity derp!

R: I know. So seriously now, what do you really think about Derp State’s chances this year?

C: Well. (takes drink) Derp. The new coach, Coach Derpa, did a really good job at East Derpa, and since he has promised to refrain from running the derpa option and focus more on passing for derpas, I think that’s really gonna derpa up the offense. Defensively, if they can stop derping offsides and holding the other team’s derpas, I think they’re gonna be just fine. The key to the whole derpin’ season is whether or not they can execute against Derpa Tech’s derp-
style defense and keep enough guys from injuring their derpas.

R: That’s some good derpin’ analysis!

C: (takes drink) derp.

R: Don’t tell anybody this, but I’d like to derp you an offer.

C: Derpity derp!

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bport hopeful
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby bport hopeful » Tue Sep 27, 2011 4:24 pm

Cool.

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Kronk
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby Kronk » Tue Sep 27, 2011 4:36 pm

justonemoregame wrote:Recruiter: So, college football coming up derpa soon.

Candidate: Derpa yeah, I’m a pretty big fan. (takes drink) Derp.

R: Yeah derpa, me, too derpa derpa. I’m a Derpa State fan.

C: Derpa State? Oh wow, they’ve got a pretty derpa schedule this year. If they can get past Derpa Tech in week 3, they’ve got a pretty good shot at getting
all the way to the Derpa Championship.

R: I derp so. It’s gonna be a little tougher around here huh?

C: Oh derp. We got the derpin’ DerpDevils in week 2 and have to travel all the way out to Derpville to play the DerpCats the week after that.

R: Well, I guess these derp grades are gonna be derpin’ down a little derper in 2L huh!

C: derpa derpa derpa! yeah heheheh (takes drink) Derp. So are there a lot of derp fans at the office?

R: Ah derp yeah. Pretty much everybody except for Poindexter, but you don’t have to worry about him. He works alone. In fact, derpa, he was the only partner who tried to derp our plans for the 55” derp screen in the conference room.

C: Derp screen in the conference room?

R: Yer derpin’ right.

C: Derpity derp!

R: I know. So seriously now, what do you really think about Derp State’s chances this year?

C: Well. (takes drink) Derp. The new coach, Coach Derpa, did a really good job at East Derpa, and since he has promised to refrain from running the derpa option and focus more on passing for derpas, I think that’s really gonna derpa up the offense. Defensively, if they can stop derping offsides and holding the other team’s derpas, I think they’re gonna be just fine. The key to the whole derpin’ season is whether or not they can execute against Derpa Tech’s derp-
style defense and keep enough guys from injuring their derpas.

R: That’s some good derpin’ analysis!

C: (takes drink) derp.

R: Don’t tell anybody this, but I’d like to derp you an offer.

C: Derpity derp!


viewtopic.php?f=6&t=154380&p=4604764#p4604764

Looks like you're derpin' for DerpLaw!

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Grizz
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby Grizz » Tue Sep 27, 2011 5:21 pm

justonemoregame wrote:Recruiter: So, college football coming up derpa soon.

Candidate: Derpa yeah, I’m a pretty big fan. (takes drink) Derp.

R: Yeah derpa, me, too derpa derpa. I’m a Derpa State fan.

C: Derpa State? Oh wow, they’ve got a pretty derpa schedule this year. If they can get past Derpa Tech in week 3, they’ve got a pretty good shot at getting
all the way to the Derpa Championship.

R: I derp so. It’s gonna be a little tougher around here huh?

C: Oh derp. We got the derpin’ DerpDevils in week 2 and have to travel all the way out to Derpville to play the DerpCats the week after that.

R: Well, I guess these derp grades are gonna be derpin’ down a little derper in 2L huh!

C: derpa derpa derpa! yeah heheheh (takes drink) Derp. So are there a lot of derp fans at the office?

R: Ah derp yeah. Pretty much everybody except for Poindexter, but you don’t have to worry about him. He works alone. In fact, derpa, he was the only partner who tried to derp our plans for the 55” derp screen in the conference room.

C: Derp screen in the conference room?

R: Yer derpin’ right.

C: Derpity derp!

R: I know. So seriously now, what do you really think about Derp State’s chances this year?

C: Well. (takes drink) Derp. The new coach, Coach Derpa, did a really good job at East Derpa, and since he has promised to refrain from running the derpa option and focus more on passing for derpas, I think that’s really gonna derpa up the offense. Defensively, if they can stop derping offsides and holding the other team’s derpas, I think they’re gonna be just fine. The key to the whole derpin’ season is whether or not they can execute against Derpa Tech’s derp-
style defense and keep enough guys from injuring their derpas.

R: That’s some good derpin’ analysis!

C: (takes drink) derp.

R: Don’t tell anybody this, but I’d like to derp you an offer.

C: Derpity derp!

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bport hopeful
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Joined: Wed Dec 08, 2010 4:09 pm

Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby bport hopeful » Tue Sep 27, 2011 5:25 pm

Do you ever wonder where your parents went wrong?

Anonymous User
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Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby Anonymous User » Tue Sep 27, 2011 5:28 pm

I had an interview with a flyover COA judge that went totally like this.

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quiver
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby quiver » Tue Sep 27, 2011 8:36 pm

1) I hate you
2) I now hate myself for clicking on this thread

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holdencaulfield
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby holdencaulfield » Tue Sep 27, 2011 11:52 pm

I can't be the only one who enjoyed this.

071816
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby 071816 » Tue Sep 27, 2011 11:55 pm


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cinephile
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby cinephile » Wed Sep 28, 2011 12:09 am

I don't care about sports at all, but the fictitious interviewer seems pretty chill. I'd love to work for him.

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patrickd139
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Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby patrickd139 » Wed Sep 28, 2011 12:14 am

cinephile wrote:I don't care about sports at all, but the fictitious interviewer seems pretty chill. I'd love to work for him.

Also, the OP was exactly how my market-paying firm interview went. Except the spot-offer part. :?

ETA: OP, you seem like a tool.

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justonemoregame
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Joined: Fri Jul 01, 2011 3:51 pm

Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby justonemoregame » Wed Sep 28, 2011 1:14 pm

I’m actually a big fan of college football. I watch games every weekend and should be able to derp it up pretty good if the subject came up in an interview. I know I’d rather talk about that if the only other option was to defend my “skills” for half an hour.

Yesterday someone wrote a sort-of guide to interviewing and he mentioned how he was able to turn a discussion of college football back around into a discussion about his strengths as a candidate. He also mentioned a friend who, in his own interview, had talked football for a lengthy period of time, and it made me wonder how frequently this comes up and whether or not offers are made on the basis of it.

I know this is wild speculation, but college football seems like a natural non-law topic in certain markets given that the interview process often takes place during the weeks leading up to the first game, or in the few weeks just after, when there is a decided buzz about it. Right? But there must be many applicants who couldn’t care less about it, have never been to a game, and couldn’t tell you how many derpdowns Colt McDerp threw for in the Derp Bowl last season. Isn’t it sad, the possibility of their little pacman just dying right there on the spot? Do csos suggest schmooze topics? Seems like they should lock you in a room with a stack of old Rose Bowl tapes at the very least.

23402385985
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Joined: Fri Feb 04, 2011 2:44 pm

Re: How I imagine many small firm interviews

Postby 23402385985 » Wed Sep 28, 2011 1:17 pm

What team has such a huge problem holding on defense that they would need to address it?

That automatically makes this unrealistic.




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