Biglaw Engagement Ring Forum

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Anonymous User
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Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Tue Jun 21, 2022 6:28 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
Tue Jun 21, 2022 2:23 pm
Labhuershi wrote:
Tue Jun 21, 2022 1:51 pm
Female associate here. Surprised that this is still a thing. Worked at two firms in the past four years and have never seen this becoming an issue - no one cares. It's a personal matter.

My ring cost <$6k but SO was doing public interest.
Echoing this with one datapoint, my wife is Brazilian-American, born in Brazil but moved to the States when she was young. It's more typical for Brazilian couples to wear matching wedding bands, with no separate engagement ring with gems. I knew that was the case when we got engaged, and I said there was a standing offer for an engagement ring if she ever wanted one, but she's never taken me up on it. We were both biglaw at the time, so we certainly could have afforded it. I asked her if she ever feels like the odd one out, and she said she feels like no one cares at all and she's never gotten any odd feelings about it.

For what it's worth, she loves to drop cash on nice clothes and looks like a million bucks in professional settings, so I don't think anyone could suspect her of not knowing how to be fashionable.
I like this. You can’t fake good fashion sense, but you can fake a diamond.

Anonymous User
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Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Tue Jun 21, 2022 7:14 pm

Biglaw partner. I spent about 6.5k all in when I was a third year, but my wife wanted a smaller diamond (roughly 0.9 carat, super high quality) and I was happy to oblige. I probably would have gone up to 20k or so without blinking.

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nealric

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Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by nealric » Thu Jun 30, 2022 11:42 am

Salary should have little to do with how much you spend. At the end of the day, the wearer just needs to be happy with it. For some, that means spending as little as possible. For others, that means some enormous thing that can only come from a name brand. If you just want others to think you spent a lot, a big diamond simulant is going to be indistinguishable to a real one anybody who isn't a jeweler. Nobody has to disclose how much they spent.

If your salary does not allow you to spend what your intended wants without it becoming a huge burden, then you might need to discuss financial priorities before making the leap.

Anonymous User
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Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Fri Jul 15, 2022 10:45 pm

Female 3rd year associate chiming in. My partner isn't a lawyer, but makes a similar salary as junior associates. I'm actively putting together my ring now, and I set the budget at $4k-5k, which is quite a bit lower than what my partner suggested.

I love fine jewelry but don't like diamonds as the center stone. I often wear custom fine jewelry, but I prefer to keep rings on the dainty side. I commissioned the perfect stone for me - a precision-cut pink sapphire in a floral-inspired facet design (not the standard round brilliant design of most commercially cut round gems, including diamonds) - and will accent it with two kite diamonds to complete the ring. I also chose the sizes to look the best on my finger proportionally, since I wear a size 4. I don't expect any negative comments about it at my firm and have never heard negative comments about others' engagement rings, but I'm fully prepared to stop them in their tracks and explain that I chose everything, down to the sapphire rough and the faceting design. At the end of the day, the only things that matter are the wearer's opinion and your budget.

Anonymous User
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Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Sat Oct 22, 2022 9:24 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
Fri Jul 15, 2022 10:45 pm
Female 3rd year associate chiming in. My partner isn't a lawyer, but makes a similar salary as junior associates. I'm actively putting together my ring now, and I set the budget at $4k-5k, which is quite a bit lower than what my partner suggested.

I love fine jewelry but don't like diamonds as the center stone. I often wear custom fine jewelry, but I prefer to keep rings on the dainty side. I commissioned the perfect stone for me - a precision-cut pink sapphire in a floral-inspired facet design (not the standard round brilliant design of most commercially cut round gems, including diamonds) - and will accent it with two kite diamonds to complete the ring. I also chose the sizes to look the best on my finger proportionally, since I wear a size 4. I don't expect any negative comments about it at my firm and have never heard negative comments about others' engagement rings, but I'm fully prepared to stop them in their tracks and explain that I chose everything, down to the sapphire rough and the faceting design. At the end of the day, the only things that matter are the wearer's opinion and your budget.
Male here. My wife's a doctor and I was just getting started when we married. She sounds like a lot like the poster above. I spent 4K on the ring and years later she's still very attached to it. Why would you ever give one shit what other people think about the ring you get your SO? Seriously people.

I left biglaw which is why we're still married but I guess that's a different thread.

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Anonymous User
Posts: 428117
Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Sat Oct 22, 2022 9:24 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
Fri Jul 15, 2022 10:45 pm
Female 3rd year associate chiming in. My partner isn't a lawyer, but makes a similar salary as junior associates. I'm actively putting together my ring now, and I set the budget at $4k-5k, which is quite a bit lower than what my partner suggested.

I love fine jewelry but don't like diamonds as the center stone. I often wear custom fine jewelry, but I prefer to keep rings on the dainty side. I commissioned the perfect stone for me - a precision-cut pink sapphire in a floral-inspired facet design (not the standard round brilliant design of most commercially cut round gems, including diamonds) - and will accent it with two kite diamonds to complete the ring. I also chose the sizes to look the best on my finger proportionally, since I wear a size 4. I don't expect any negative comments about it at my firm and have never heard negative comments about others' engagement rings, but I'm fully prepared to stop them in their tracks and explain that I chose everything, down to the sapphire rough and the faceting design. At the end of the day, the only things that matter are the wearer's opinion and your budget.
Male here. My wife's a doctor and I was just getting started when we married. She sounds like a lot like the poster above. I spent 4K on the ring and years later she's still very attached to it. Why would you ever give one shit what other people think about the ring you get your SO? Seriously people.

I left biglaw which is why we're still married but I guess that's a different thread.

Anonymous User
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Joined: Tue Aug 11, 2009 9:32 am

Re: Biglaw Engagement Ring

Post by Anonymous User » Mon Oct 24, 2022 5:15 pm

I was a 2nd year biglaw associate when I got engaged and I spent around $8-9k on the ring. I don't believe in standards or guidelines on this. Its more about determining what is important to you, what features you are looking for, etc. And then let those criteria be the guide. Don't worry about hitting some arbitrary $$ threshold.

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