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1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:43 pm
by andi20
I'm sure this question has been asked somewhere before, but does anyone have any advice on how to study properly during 1L and also maintain a healthy relationship with a significant other? Right now that is one of my biggest concerns...if it will even be possible to keep up my relationship without my girlfriend feeling neglected. Especially since we will be living 6 hours away, so we won't get to see each other all the time.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:50 pm
by JazzOne
Six hours away? Maybe you could arrange to go home every other weekend or something. I don't see how you're going to spend much time with her unless you neglect your studies. Even if you do manage to go home or have her visit you, there will be much to do, especially as finals draw near. This may not be the answer you were looking for, but your relationship is probably going to suffer if you take law school seriously. Hopefully your SO is secure enough to understand.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 3:51 pm
by Killacam18
First off I'm a 0L so take what I say with a grain of salt. I did do the LD thing in UG and it actually could almost be easier in a way. We were also ~6 hrs apart and she visited about once a month (I was an athlete and couldn't travel for most of the year). You just need to be disciplined and open with each other about how you're feeling. As with 1L and anything I'm sure if it is important enough to you then you can make it work. The key as with everything is discipline and time management, and on the relationship side just communicate openly and as often as your schedules allow.
Oh and one other suggestion, I would try and refrain from talking shop... you're time together/talking will be rare and important don't waste it talking about things that will be complete irrelevant to your SO.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:45 pm
by Knock
Killacam18 wrote:First off I'm a 0L so take what I say with a grain of salt. I did do the LD thing in UG and it actually could almost be easier in a way. We were also ~6 hrs apart and she visited about once a month (I was an athlete and couldn't travel for most of the year). You just need to be disciplined and open with each other about how you're feeling. As with 1L and anything I'm sure if it is important enough to you then you can make it work. The key as with everything is discipline and time management, and on the relationship side just communicate openly and as often as your schedules allow.
Oh and one other suggestion, I would try and refrain from talking shop... you're time together/talking will be rare and important don't waste it talking about things that will be complete irrelevant to your SO.
Great response!!!
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:48 pm
by cao0008
Skype!!!! Everyday at a set time

I live 3 hours away from my bf but by plane! So be happy, it could be worse.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:51 pm
by agentzer0
cao0008 wrote:Skype!!!! Everyday at a set time
Naughty
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Thu Jan 28, 2010 5:53 pm
by cao0008
wow... What a dirty mind you have. lol
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 2:48 pm
by mikeyp
i know a few people in 1L now that maintain long distance relationships, and they've been doing fine so far. a lot of them, though, have significant others that are just as busy (i.e., attending other law schools, med school, etc). but it can be done.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 3:17 pm
by Sauer Grapes
....
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 3:49 pm
by mikeyp
Sauer Grapes wrote:1L should let your girlfriend and you find out a lot about your relationship. If it survives, then I think you have a good thing going.
+1
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:02 pm
by extempore88
.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:21 pm
by housie07
I'm in my third year of long distance (coming to an end this summer, thank God), and, like a couple posts above, it will let you know a lot about your relationship. Are you looking forward to talking to her each night (and it better be each night, or it will be every other night, then every few nights, etc.), or does it seem like a burden--like one more thing to cross off your list? That, I think, is the only thing you need to ask yourself. I don't care how busy you are. There is always time to talk, even if it's just fifteen minutes to let her know you're thinking of her.
You get exactly what you give--no more or less.
Re: 1L and trying to maintain a relationship
Posted: Sat Jan 30, 2010 4:49 pm
by vandalvideo
Hart did it. Then again, Hart is a god among lawyers.