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engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 8:00 am
by inyoureyes89
Anyone else? I'm currently a 0L planning on having my wedding while I'm in law school. Does anyone have any input on the best time to do this? Summer after 2L but before (or after) a summer associate position? Spring break my 2L year? I feel like anytime during/after 1L year will be too hectic.
Thanks!
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 10:26 am
by justinp
Not a member of your target demographic here, but if you are planning to work at a law firm your 2L summer you'll likely have a few weeks off in August. Most schools' 2L summers are pretty long (I think mine is 16-17 weeks?) and most firms' summer programs are in the 10-12 week range.
August, a time for romance.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 10:28 am
by nomdeplumeify
I am not engaged nor married, but I know quite a few people in law school that have been. One person got married [in 1L year] in April 2 weeks before our appellate brief was due - don't do this, obviously. Another person got married the first Saturday of spring break [of her 3L year] and spent the entirety of spring break on her honeymoon. Almost everybody else I know plans on getting married in 2017 after we graduate and pass the bar.
Personally [like I said before, not married, not engaged], one of the best times to get married would be 3L winter break, and either honeymooning then or waiting until spring break to go on it. 1L it would be a distraction and for 2L there are too many things going on.
You also might be better off just getting married before 1L starts and spend the entire summer planning the wedding.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 10:37 am
by tnguy03
3L here about to graduate. 1L/2L SA's under my belt and headed into biglaw. I got married during fall 3L, planned for marriage since 2L fall.
Don't mess up your 1L year, grades are too important. Fall of 2L, you will be interviewing (I still interviewed even with the 1L offer), other distractions will mess up your interview game. You are also flying back and forth which creates a lot of strain while having to remember a lot of names and practice groups.
Spring 2L should be fine if you can't wait. Ideally though, you push it to summer after 2L SA job. It gives you something to talk about 2L summer that's fun and not dangerous, don't bore people though. You want to focus on on doing a good job during 2L summer though, so I wouldn't do any serious heavy lifting for preparations if it will affect your job performance.
After 2L summer, take a very easy course load during 3L and then do all your marriage stuff then. I did my honeymoon during spring break with the wedding stuff during winter break. Missed some classes, but Professor's were generally ok with it after I informed them.
Bottom line: Don't mess up your top-law-schools.com/career goals. It will make you unhappy if you don't get the job you seek which won't be good for your relationship.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 10:49 am
by carolinainmymind
justinp wrote:Not a member of your target demographic here, but if you are planning to work at a law firm your 2L summer you'll likely have a few weeks off in August. Most schools' 2L summers are pretty long (I think mine is 16-17 weeks?) and most firms' summer programs are in the 10-12 week range.
August, a time for romance.
Does the same thing apply for 1L August? Do the internships/whatever 1L end and leave time in August? (I will not be doing the bulk of the planning, so should not be an issue for 1L year.)
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 11:12 am
by rpupkin
carolinainmymind wrote:justinp wrote:Not a member of your target demographic here, but if you are planning to work at a law firm your 2L summer you'll likely have a few weeks off in August. Most schools' 2L summers are pretty long (I think mine is 16-17 weeks?) and most firms' summer programs are in the 10-12 week range.
August, a time for romance.
Does the same thing apply for 1L August? Do the internships/whatever 1L end and leave time in August? (I will not be doing the bulk of the planning, so should not be an issue for 1L year.)
If you expect yourself to be in a position to land a big firm job for your 2L summer (the likelihood of this depends on the law school you attend), then I suggest getting married in August between your second and third year of law school. At the end of your 1L summer, you will be focused on preparing for OCI; it's not a great time to be worrying about a wedding. But assuming you get a job through OCI at a big firm, and assuming your aren't one of the unlucky few who gets no-offered, you'll have a nice chunk of stress-free weeks in August before your 3L year.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 11:19 am
by badaboom61
carolinainmymind wrote:justinp wrote:Not a member of your target demographic here, but if you are planning to work at a law firm your 2L summer you'll likely have a few weeks off in August. Most schools' 2L summers are pretty long (I think mine is 16-17 weeks?) and most firms' summer programs are in the 10-12 week range.
August, a time for romance.
Does the same thing apply for 1L August? Do the internships/whatever 1L end and leave time in August? (I will not be doing the bulk of the planning, so should not be an issue for 1L year.)
Post-1L August would be about the worst possible time to try to do it, since that's when OCI and callbacks happen.
I got married during winter break of 1L and delayed my honeymoon until the next year. It was a little bit of a tight schedule (I had several 1L summer job interviews the week before) and it would have been nice to do an immediate honeymoon, but I never felt like any of it distracted from my law school performance. We did the bulk of the planning (lining up venue and catering and stuff) over the summer before law school started and then it was mostly just sending invitations and such during the year, which was totally manageable.
If you want to get married 1L, you could safely get married over winter break (during the week between Christmas and new years) or spring break. You probably will need to delay your honeymoon.
If you want to get married 2L, you could do it either winter or spring break, and depending on timing, you probably will be able to do a honeymoon as well.
If you want to get married 3L, you could get married in August after your summer internship ends and before school starts (often there's a 3-5 week gap), or during winter break, or during spring break, or the next August after the bar exam.
I think August after 2L would be the ideal time to do it, but I don't think it's necessarily worth waiting 2 years.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 11:27 am
by carolinainmymind
Appreciate the advice. Now all I have to do is break that news to the SO.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 12:15 pm
by worldtraveler
A lot of this depends on how elaborate of an affair your wedding will be. If it's a small thing, do it whenever you want.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 12:20 pm
by jbagelboy
working through similar stuff. I'm thinking bar trip or winter of 3L, but maybe you don't want to wait that long.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 9:19 pm
by inyoureyes89
Thanks all for the advice! I'm sending this thread to my fiance.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Thu May 01, 2014 9:29 pm
by dwil770
inyoureyes89 wrote:Thanks all for the advice! I'm sending this thread to my fiance.
Are you guys long distance? Feel free to PM me I can help you with all your issues
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Fri May 02, 2014 11:36 am
by Crowing
jbagelboy wrote:working through similar stuff. I'm thinking bar trip or winter of 3L, but maybe you don't want to wait that long.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Sat May 03, 2014 9:19 pm
by the_phoenix612
I proposed to my (now) fiancee February of 1L year. She's getting her masters concurrently with my JD, so we'll both graduate May of 2015. We set our date for two weeks after the bar - gives us time for a short honeymoon before her job will start in late August.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Sat May 03, 2014 9:31 pm
by sd5289
Just saw this (don't know how I missed it), but word to the wise: DON'T DO IT.
My fiancee and I actually postponed until after I finish exams 3L year and before I graduate. I had to hustle my 1L summer jerb (state), which did wonders for helping me land my 2L summer jerb (federal), and again I'll need to hustle there. My permanent hiring process begins (starting with the 1L state agency as well as the federal Honor's Program) as soon as I'm done with that 2L job, plus I'm taking the MPRE in August. This means that there was just no right time to get married, not to mention the amount of planning that goes into it just isn't conducive to either 1L or 2L year. 1L year you're figuring everything out, and 2L year you're running around trying to get everything done like a crazy person. I've barely had room to breathe as a 2L, but it's very clear that I'll actually be able to focus on non-law school things during 3L year, including planning my wedding.
Moreover (hah, I'm clearly in finals mode), by having the wedding in between finals and graduation of 3L year, that means I'll be able to focus 100% on the bar, and then? European vacay / honeymoon. Plus she'll probably be so enamored with the being married part during the horrendous bar exam process that I won't be divorced by the end of July.
P.S. what's the worst that can happen if you wait? Either you figure out in law school (which is basically the perfect catalyst to breaking up relationships) that you're not actually compatible, or, like me, you've found someone who'll put up with your silly LS shit (my fiancee is currently out having margaritas with her friends b/c I was like "I NEED COMPLETE AND TOTAL SILENCE IN THE HOUSE" for outlining purposes...she gets me) and that person will still be around by the time you're finished.
ETA: shit's going to come up during LS that you didn't expect that's going to take your time and attention. It's easier to deal with that if you don't have this other gigantic thing hanging over your head that didn't necessarily need to be there.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Sat May 03, 2014 9:37 pm
by xRON MEXiCOx
just go sign the papers. BOOM, married.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Sat May 03, 2014 9:40 pm
by IAFG
worldtraveler wrote:A lot of this depends on how elaborate of an affair your wedding will be. If it's a small thing, do it whenever you want.
Yeah totally depends on the wedding. We got married immediately after finals but we did wedding planning on easy mode so it wasn't really disruptive.
Re: engaged law students
Posted: Sat May 03, 2014 9:45 pm
by whut
inyoureyes89 wrote:Anyone else? I'm currently a 0L planning on having my wedding while I'm in law school. Does anyone have any input on the best time to do this? Summer after 2L but before (or after) a summer associate position? Spring break my 2L year? I feel like anytime during/after 1L year will be too hectic.
Thanks!
Depends on who the spouse is. Is he also going to law school? Does he have a steady job to take care of you?
Or are you both undergrads just hoping for the best to happen