Big Law Associates: Would You Rather Shovel Shit? Forum

[LeDique]

Can I live wherever I want if I am shoveling poo for 160k?

No. You gotta go wherever the shit takes you. Enjoy South Dakota.

[LeDique]

The majority response in this thread (i.e. in favor of shoveling) is a sad commentary on the people that post here. I've worked manual labor for good money and worked slightly better than big law type hours for good money. Anyone who has ever actually worked manual labor because they had to is probably taking the air-conditioned office, snack/coffee breaks and hour-long lunches in a heart beat.

disagree. 9-5 and the 160k are pretty sweet.

9-5 of physical labor under horrible conditions is like a 14-hour day in big law, every day. Honestly, if you just want to make decent money (at least outside of NYC) and aren't trying to have a chance of making partner you can hide out in biglaw for a few years, work 50-65 hrs (on average) and get out with a relatively low-pressure 80-120k 50 hr/week in-house job. Obviously this is an oversimplification and nothing is guaranteed but this isn't exactly an unheard of route to take.

thepoint.gif

[Gooner91]

Can I live wherever I want if I am shoveling poo for 160k?

No. You gotta go wherever the shit takes you. Enjoy South Dakota.

160k prolly goes a long way in South Dakota.

[yossarian]

160k prolly goes a long way in South Dakota.

I think it automatically makes you a Duke or something. Second only to the Oil Barrons.

[MKC]

160k prolly goes a long way in South Dakota.

I think it automatically makes you a Duke or something. Second only to the Oil Barrons.

http://www.businessinsider.com/most-exp ... 08-acres-1

The most expensive house in North Dakota is $1.2 million. Mortgage probably comes to $3,500 a month. So, the biggest house in South Dakota runs about the same as payments on tuition at sticker debt.

[bjsesq]

I would rather shovel shit.

[20141023]

.

[Kikero]

Either way, I think this hypo is pretty unrealistic. No way clients are willing to pay for juniors to shovel their shit.

They've paid for junior associates to do even more menial work than shoveling shit. Trust me. In fact, they do it all the time.

I meant the opposite, that clients are going to insist that only experienced shit shovelers work on their very important shit.

[jingosaur]

After shoveling shit for a few years, will I have exit options that involve more preftigious work with shit?

[rayiner]

A friend of mine actually worked at a Mega Blocks factory once and said people would spontaneously burst into tears all the time.

This is amazing. Is everyone assigned one type/color of block to make? Is it someone's job to just load the plastic into the extruder? What did your friend do? What did the criers do? Is the Lego factory better? Are you allowed to make a fort to work in?

Man, that sentence brings up so many questions.

Lol, i can't tell if you're serious but i'll answer anyway.

At the plant where she worked, they just put mega blocks into little boxes. So there are a bunch of conveyor belts and at the starting end of each one a few employees are picking up flattened boxes and constructing them as fast as possible. The middle portion has a bunch of people tasked with putting a certain combination of blocks into the boxes, like say 5 red small ones, 6 big green ones, and 7 small yellow ones. They have to do that for every box, the boxes are an inch apart, and the belt is moving too fast, so my friend says it's impossible to count the pieces fast enough. You fuck up, boxes bunch up, and you're yelled at. At the end someone seals them and then weighs each box, and if the weight it off, everyone on the line is yelled at. When one of your supply boxes is running low, they don't stop the line to let you get more. Instead you tell this person whose sole task is to refill supply boxes. They are often too late because they also have way too much to do, your boxes bunch up, and you both get yelled at. My friend says that the timing and getting yelled at is the worst part. Even the monotony would be bearable if you could zone out while working but the pace requires your brain to be constantly engaged for hours, so it's extremely exhausting mentally. And the supervisors treat you like you're worthless. She says people mostly cry because they just can't handle the fatigue or because they just fucked up and they know they're about to be yelled at and possibly lose their job. And all of this was in Canada. I can't imagine how it is in third-world countries.

You just described transactional practice, down to the yelling.

[84651846190]

After shoveling shit for a few years, will I have exit options that involve more preftigious work with shit?

If you did, it would be better than most biglaw jobs.

[Ricky-Bobby]

Lol, i can't tell if you're serious but i'll answer anyway.

At the plant where she worked, they just put mega blocks into little boxes. So there are a bunch of conveyor belts and at the starting end of each one a few employees are picking up flattened boxes and constructing them as fast as possible. The middle portion has a bunch of people tasked with putting a certain combination of blocks into the boxes, like say 5 red small ones, 6 big green ones, and 7 small yellow ones. They have to do that for every box, the boxes are an inch apart, and the belt is moving too fast, so my friend says it's impossible to count the pieces fast enough. You fuck up, boxes bunch up, and you're yelled at. At the end someone seals them and then weighs each box, and if the weight it off, everyone on the line is yelled at. When one of your supply boxes is running low, they don't stop the line to let you get more. Instead you tell this person whose sole task is to refill supply boxes. They are often too late because they also have way too much to do, your boxes bunch up, and you both get yelled at. My friend says that the timing and getting yelled at is the worst part. Even the monotony would be bearable if you could zone out while working but the pace requires your brain to be constantly engaged for hours, so it's extremely exhausting mentally. And the supervisors treat you like you're worthless. She says people mostly cry because they just can't handle the fatigue or because they just fucked up and they know they're about to be yelled at and possibly lose their job. And all of this was in Canada. I can't imagine how it is in third-world countries.

Holy shit I forgot about this thread for a while.

I was entirely (ok mostly) serious, and this answer is awesome. I like to imagine the crazy contrast of the brightly-colored blocks and the weeping, despair-filled workers. On that note, I should probably look into some therapy.

Thanks for the response.