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Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:21 pm
by rawrab
I know this is a dumb question but as I'm nearing the end of my first semester of law school I'm wondering if I'm not cut out for being a lawyer because I don't have the personality.
I am enjoying all my classes and doing well, but I hate talking in class and am very shy. Also, I have made friends but I find it hard to make close friends/keep them at law school because honestly after going to class all I want to do is go home. I have a fiancé so I prefer to get home as quick as possible and do my work at home so that I can spend more time with him and also because I just really enjoy my alone time. The people at law school are okay, but I'd rather just get away from there as soon as possible, plus I already have some good friends outside of school. I notice that most other people in law school spend hours every day just shooting the shit and that is just not something I enjoy.
Is it possible to be a lawyer when you generally just prefer to be at home and alone and don't really like hanging out with other people all the time?
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:22 pm
by ph14
rawrab wrote:I know this is a dumb question but as I'm nearing the end of my first semester of law school I'm wondering if I'm not cut out for being a lawyer because I don't have the personality.
I am enjoying all my classes and doing well, but I hate talking in class and am very shy. Also, I have made friends but I find it hard to make close friends/keep them at law school because honestly after going to class all I want to do is go home. I have a fiancé so I prefer to get home as quick as possible and do my work at home so that I can spend more time with him and also because I just really enjoy my alone time. The people at law school are okay, but I'd rather just get away from there as soon as possible, plus I already have some good friends outside of school. I notice that most other people in law school spend hours every day just shooting the shit and that is just not something I enjoy.
Is it possible to be a lawyer when you generally just prefer to be at home and alone and don't really like hanging out with other people all the time?
Yes. Although you'll probably have to fake it a bit while you're getting interviewed and hired. Don't let it discourage you
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:27 pm
by kalvano
They are called transactional attorneys.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:32 pm
by luthersloan
Or tax attorneys.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:51 pm
by crossarmant
rawrab wrote:I know this is a dumb question but as I'm nearing the end of my first semester of law school I'm wondering if I'm not cut out for being a lawyer because I don't have the personality.
I am enjoying all my classes and doing well, but I hate talking in class and am very shy. Also, I have made friends but I find it hard to make close friends/keep them at law school because honestly after going to class all I want to do is go home. I have a fiancé so I prefer to get home as quick as possible and do my work at home so that I can spend more time with him and also because I just really enjoy my alone time. The people at law school are okay, but I'd rather just get away from there as soon as possible, plus I already have some good friends outside of school. I notice that most other people in law school spend hours every day just shooting the shit and that is just not something I enjoy.
Is it possible to be a lawyer when you generally just prefer to be at home and alone and don't really like hanging out with other people all the time?
I'm exactly the same. I think if you can snag a job and fake it when need be, we should be okay. We're not going to be running for public office or anything like that but we should be alright when it comes to the actual work involved...
I have a feeling I'm going to turn into Wayne Jarvis from Arrested Development:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CC3IaOOu ... re=related
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 10:59 pm
by headandshoulderos
Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner --- you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of

.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:00 pm
by ph14
headandshoulderos wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner ---
you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of 
.
This attitude is extremely dumb.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:01 pm
by MrAnon
There are lots of women like you in the profession. generally my sense is that they hate it, they are just doing it to pay off their loans, and they try to get out as soon as possible.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:02 pm
by headandshoulderos
ph14 wrote:headandshoulderos wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner ---
you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of 
.
This attitude is extremely dumb.
Curious why you think so?
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:05 pm
by NYC Law
ph14 wrote:headandshoulderos wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner ---
you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of 
.
This attitude is extremely dumb.
If you don't recognize the problem with law students, you are the problem.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:10 pm
by rawrab
Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner --- you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of .
This is exactly how I feel. I have friends outside of law school that I hang out with on the weekends but I just don't click with anyone at school either. My personality at school and home/with friends is very different. At school I'm serious and quiet and just want to get the hell out of there, while at home and with friends I am pretty fun and outgoing. Sometimes law school just makes me feel like a huge loser that can't get along with any lawyers. And then when people do sometimes invite me to go to lunch or hang out, I just want to get my work done as soon as possible so I can leave/finish studying so I have to decline which makes me feel bad. It's all just so annoying.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:11 pm
by kalvano
rawrab wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner --- you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of .
This is exactly how I feel. I have friends outside of law school that I hang out with on the weekends but I just don't click with anyone at school either. My personality at school and home/with friends is very different. At school I'm serious and quiet and just want to get the hell out of there, while at home and with friends I am pretty fun and outgoing. Sometimes law school just makes me feel like a huge loser that can't get along with any lawyers. And then when people do sometimes invite me to go to lunch or hang out, I just want to get my work done as soon as possible so I can leave/finish studying so I have to decline which makes me feel bad. It's all just so annoying.
I think you'll be fine once you get a job and aren't in school.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:11 pm
by ph14
NYC Law wrote:ph14 wrote:headandshoulderos wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner ---
you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of 
.
This attitude is extremely dumb.
If you don't recognize the problem with law students, you are the problem.

Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:12 pm
by headandshoulderos
rawrab wrote:Do you have friends outside of law school? I have a strong network of friends but don't really click with anybody at my law school and like to get out of there as quickly as possible. It reminds me of some weird mix of high school and all the bad parts of undergrad. I think it's pretty normal not to get a long with law students, especially when you are a bit more mature and have a fiance / serious relationship. There's a serious single, going out to get drunk contingent at any school.
Anyway, if you are just generally a loner that's fine too---being a lawyer is all about writing. You don't really have to interact with people as much as a customer service person or salesperson, for example.
But, I'm just saying you might not actually be a loner --- you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of .
This is exactly how I feel. I have friends outside of law school that I hang out with on the weekends but I just don't click with anyone at school either. My personality at school and home/with friends is very different. At school I'm serious and quiet and just want to get the hell out of there, while at home and with friends I am pretty fun and outgoing. Sometimes law school just makes me feel like a huge loser that can't get along with any lawyers. And then when people do sometimes invite me to go to lunch or hang out, I just want to get my work done as soon as possible so I can leave/finish studying so I have to decline which makes me feel bad. It's all just so annoying.
Ya, you're just normal. I guarantee you most lawyers wouldn't be able to hang out with typical law students for extended periods of time either.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:14 pm
by ahduth
NYC Law wrote:If you don't recognize the problem with law students, you are the problem.
You're either part of the problem, or part of the solution.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:32 pm
by sccjnthn
I would also assume that this might become a problem once you advance in your career and start needing to attract clients. I've heard that as you progress salesmanship really becomes the key to continuing to advance...it seems like much of the details of lawyering can be shoveled off on "of counsel" and the lower level associates.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Fri Dec 02, 2011 11:40 pm
by romothesavior
MrAnon wrote:There are lots of women like you in the profession. generally my sense is that they hate it, they are just doing it to pay off their loans, and they try to get out as soon as possible.
Really insightful.
Re: Can you be a lawyer and be a loner?
Posted: Sat Dec 03, 2011 12:01 am
by prezidentv8
headandshoulderos wrote:you might just be not fit in with law students, which is something to be proud of

.
Checking in.
