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...thanks everyone i appreciate it!

It's a regrettable situation but you're making a mistake right now in assuming that their reaction will be negative because you're close to the situation (and because you've spent time over the years reflecting on this). It's been four years, people in the organization have had other things occupying their time and the people you worked with may not be there anymore.

You're right that you need to reach out about the affidavit regardless. I would start by calling someone at the organization to get some general information about sending them the affidavit, etc. That way you can open up the lines of communication in an informal way. I wouldn't raise your concerns at this stage. Give them a chance to complete the affidavit and then assess. It's possible that they will complete the form in a neutral manner and I wouldn't get too anxious until you know for sure there is a situation you need to address and remediate.

OP here. So I actually notified my school during 2L and they said my e-mail to the school will be in my file which is relayed to the bar upon graduation. I thought it would be best to notify them. Most people except one person who primarily oversaw me are still there so.... It really is regrettable and i am really worried.

People flake on volunteer work all the time. You're right to feel like a jerk about it but I highly doubt your face is on a break-room poster above the words "NEGATIVE REFERENCES ONLY".

Reach out to your past supervisor. Come clean, accept responsibility and apologize for your past mistake.

Disclose to the bar and explain why you did what you did and how you learned from it.

I don’t think it’s a big deal, unless you try to hide it. Especially if it was this one thing, rather than a history of such behavior. Maybe I’m wrong.

The Lsat Airbender wrote:People flake on volunteer work all the time. You're right to feel like a jerk about it but I highly doubt your face is on a break-room poster above the words "NEGATIVE REFERENCES ONLY".

This mental image really cracked me up.

I worked at a non-profit before I went to law school. It's been 4 years, and all my colleagues have left the place already.

I doubt anyone in that organization would even remember you.