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I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Deep breath.

Take steps to transition out.

This doesn't have to be your life forever.

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Really sorry that you feel this way, and I recommend making some time to talk to someone about it. Also, it sounds like you might be in a toxic office environment, in which case you should explore lateraling.

That said, to advise students not to aim for biglaw is a bit of an unfair generalization, in my opinion. While it's helpful to caution people based on your experience, there are plenty of biglaw attorneys (myself included) who really enjoy working at their firms. If you truly want to preach caution, maybe it would be helpful to advise people to stay away from your particular firm (which sounds miserable), rather than the career path as a whole. I have a completely opposite experience; people at my office are (generally) fit, happy, social and genuine, and while we work hard, everyone operates as a team. Yes, the hours are rough at times, but my firm makes it far more manageable with no face-time requirements for folks at any seniority level.

Again, while I'm sorry to hear about your situation, and I really do feel for you, your experience is not necessarily universal.

I agree that BigLaw is definitely not the greatest achievement you can achieve, and you should definitely pursue whatever area of the law interests most. BigLaw life pretty much seems to look like the same rat-race as other jobs, it just gets you a slightly nicer house/apartment and slightly nicer car.

But just to provide a counter-balance, IME everyone I encountered in my summer was pretty much the opposite: fit, seemingly healthy, upbeat, and enjoyed enough what they do. There's definitely outliers in all aspects of life, but I don't think BigLaw is just generally filled with fat, miserable people. I doubt they all had their recruiting hats on the entire summer and just faked it. There's definitely nothing wrong with working hard for a few years and then jumping somewhere else. But the generalization that BigLaw is some shit-hole looks like you are at the wrong firm.

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

bearsfan23 wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

You dumb fuck, I don't want a 40 hour work week, I want people to look beyond a paycheck and be good lawyers for more than just money. Life is not about making 180K you stupid motherfucker.

bearsfan23 wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

Thanks for being a model example of how great working biglaw can be, especially the coworker aspect.

Beaten to the punch by Johann

Bearsfan why are you so irascible? Who made you this way? Come out of the on-topics and into the baking exchange Lounge thread and we'll make you some cookies or something.

bearsfan23 wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

....what the fuck?

bearsfan23 wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

Holy shit 180

One of my most jarring experiences was taking the bar. I've never seen so many ugly and overweight people collected in one room, except maybe at a Sizzlers

bearsfan23 wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Every4one I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Oh look, a dumb fucking K-JD. Breaking news dipshit, the vast majority of the professional class (including you I'm sure) looks like DF, not a bunch of supermodels.

And have you literally never read this board before? Everyone on here knows Biglaw can be soul-crushing work, and it's a huge mistake to get into if you're not aware of it. Did you not do OCI? Did you not summer at a firm? You seem just like a whiny bitch.

Nobody is forcing you to do biglaw, just quit if your "life is passing you by" or whatever the fuck that means. You're Exhibit A for why being a K-JD should be illegal. You want to work 40 hours a week in a fun job, and still make $180k. With rare exceptions, that just doesn't happen. And why the fuck are you giving career advice, when it's pretty obvious you just started working?

Oh, and in before Nony starts giving advice on what Biglaw is like, because she just can't help herself

Did you even read the OP's first sentence? He is venting, which is totally fine and healthy. If all you are going to do is put someone down who is going through a rough time, then may I suggest you STFU and GTFO.

Yanky91 wrote:I Just want to vent a little. I worked my ass off and did well in law school. I got a job at a firm I thought I wanted to work at. For all those who think "Biglaw" is the greatest achievement you can achieve, it is not. Biglaw, as they call it, is shit. I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm is miserable. Everyone I have ever spoken to in my firm wishes they did something else with their lives. How did this profession fall to this level? This shit is depressing. If you are in law school studying your ass off to go to "biglaw" stop. Study to learn and do well, and then choose a career that you enjoy and that interests you. Focus in an area of law that is your bread and butter. Don't get sucked into all the hype. Find your niche and find what you love to do. Don't listen to all the noise. If you want to work at a smaller family law firm, then do it. Don't slack off in school, and learn the material for the sake of knowing the law. Please do not let these fucking morons have an effect on you. I make a lot of money, sure, but in the end, I almost never see my wife and kid. I just feel like I am doing something . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . but my life is passing me by, and the most important parts will be lost in the wind.

Sorry you're going through this crappy experience. Hopefully you can find another legal job in an environment that is less soul-crushing and compatible with raising a family.

seriously, bears fan: why do you go up to 11, like, immediately? Why so angry?

Rahviveh wrote:Holy shit 180

One of my most jarring experiences was taking the bar. I've never seen so many ugly and overweight people collected in one room, except maybe at a Sizzlers

where did you take the bar? this was not my experience at all in NY (Javits). were you in Albany with all those 2nd/3rd Dept people or the Midwest?

HamNewton wrote:I agree that BigLaw is definitely not the greatest achievement you can achieve, and you should definitely pursue whatever area of the law interests most. BigLaw life pretty much seems to look like the same rat-race as other jobs, it just gets you a slightly nicer house/apartment and slightly nicer car.

But just to provide a counter-balance, IME everyone I encountered in my summer was pretty much the opposite: fit, seemingly healthy, upbeat, and enjoyed enough what they do. There's definitely outliers in all aspects of life, but I don't think BigLaw is just generally filled with fat, miserable people. I doubt they all had their recruiting hats on the entire summer and just faked it. There's definitely nothing wrong with working hard for a few years and then jumping somewhere else. But the generalization that BigLaw is some shit-hole looks like you are at the wrong firm.

Have you started work as an associate yet?

Just do Davis Polk and join the pretty people there

KM2016 wrote:
Really sorry that you feel this way, and I recommend making some time to talk to someone about it. Also, it sounds like you might be in a toxic office environment, in which case you should explore lateraling.

That said, to advise students not to aim for biglaw is a bit of an unfair generalization, in my opinion. While it's helpful to caution people based on your experience, there are plenty of biglaw attorneys (myself included) who really enjoy working at their firms. If you truly want to preach caution, maybe it would be helpful to advise people to stay away from your particular firm (which sounds miserable), rather than the career path as a whole. I have a completely opposite experience; people at my office are (generally) fit, happy, social and genuine, and while we work hard, everyone operates as a team. Yes, the hours are rough at times, but my firm makes it far more manageable with no face-time requirements for folks at any seniority level.

Again, while I'm sorry to hear about your situation, and I really do feel for you, your experience is not necessarily universal.

Yeah, I really like my job, and you can't really do what I do at a non-biglaw firm. The advice should be to try and put yourself in a position where you have options and opportunities, which it sounds like is what OP is saying.

Just going off of your venting, it seems like your distaste for your co-workers is the biggest issue?

Yanky91 wrote:I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people.

I have the same experience at my firm but I use it as motivation to keep myself in shape. So when I get home, even though I'm beat af after a 9, 10, 11, or 12 hour work day, I still try to hit the gym for an hour. I end up feeling better when I'm at work and no so sluggish, which in turn helps fight depression.

Capitol_Idea wrote:Just do Davis Polk and join the pretty people there

Just stroll in at 11:30pm or so and have a drink with the associates. It's like Tinder, but for biglaw attorneys.

I don't always love what I do, and the hours can be shitty at times, but at the end of the day I: (1) control my own schedule (with the exception of days leading up to filings); (2) work remotely whenever I want; (3) work with incredibly smart, and (for the most part) friendly people, from whom I have learned a shit ton; and (4) get to pay off my loans, which is a luxury the vast majority of graduates cannot say. The toxic work environment can have a huge impact on your day to day. I agree with the other posters in that it sounds like a lateral move makes sense. Good luck. Working in a big law firm environment is not easy, but there are certain variables you can control by picking the right firm.

Life is full of happy people and, in counterpoint, people who will never be happy.

I flew jets in a former life--arguably a lot of people's (overgrown kid's) dream job. You know what? I met viscerally unhappy people doing that job all the time. I also met people who were thrilled to be doing that job and wouldn't've traded those experiences for the world. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

Similarly, my wife is a current V100 biglaw litigation associate. In her group of friends, there are viscerally unhappy people and those who are enjoying themselves. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

To expand this further, my brother is an MD/PHD practicing as a physician and researcher at a very high level in his field. I've met his friends. Some are viscerally unhappy people. Others love the shit out of their job. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

In this thread you will find examples of people who enjoy being a biglaw lawyer and those who don't. This isn't unique to the legal industry. This spectrum of personalities and their subjective experiences of enjoyment are on full display across careers and across industries.

Ultimately, IMO, people who look to a career to fulfill them are setting themselves up for disappointment. (If it happens, great--but if not, that wasn't its purpose anyway.) Focus on getting/keeping a kickass group of friends, a loving family and developing hobbies or an outlet for your talents and passions after work hours. This is a good way to disappointment-proof your life so you aren't overly reliant on your career to fill that gaping hole where "need for belonging" and "need for fulfillment" plug in.

Good luck!

ponderingmeerkat wrote:Life is full of happy people and, in counterpoint, people who will never be happy.

I flew jets in a former life--arguably a lot of people's (overgrown kid's) dream job. You know what? I met viscerally unhappy people doing that job all the time. I also met people who were thrilled to be doing that job and wouldn't've traded those experiences for the world. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

Similarly, my wife is a current V100 biglaw litigation associate. In her group of friends, there are viscerally unhappy people and those who are enjoying themselves. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

To expand this further, my brother is an MD/PHD practicing as a physician and researcher at a very high level in his field. I've met his friends. Some are viscerally unhappy people. Others love the shit out of their job. Same job, same demands. Different personalities.

In this thread you will find examples of people who enjoy being a biglaw lawyer and those who don't. This isn't unique to the legal industry. This spectrum of personalities and their subjective experiences of enjoyment are on full display across careers and across industries.

Ultimately, IMO, people who look to a career to fulfill them are setting themselves up for disappointment. (If it happens, great--but if not, that wasn't its purpose anyway.) Focus on getting/keeping a kickass group of friends, a loving family and developing hobbies or an outlet for your talents and passions after work hours. This is a good way to disappointment-proof your life so you aren't overly reliant on your career to fill that gaping hole where "need for belonging" and "need for fulfillment" plug in.

Good luck!

saving in pdf form on desktop

Come to LA where we shame fat associates and guilt them into doing soulcycle.

1styearlateral wrote:

Yanky91 wrote:I am surrounded by fat, ugly, unhealthy, depressed people.

I have the same experience at my firm but I use it as motivation to keep myself in shape. So when I get home, even though I'm beat af after a 9, 10, 11, or 12 hour work day, I still try to hit the gym for an hour. I end up feeling better when I'm at work and no so sluggish, which in turn helps fight depression.

I worked somewhere full of "fat, ugly, unhealthy people" and it was pretty good. Easy to look good in comparison when everyone else is a slob.