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New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 8:38 pm
by Anonymous User
I'll start: Have been at my firm for about a month now. Billed 60+ hours per week for that entire time. No work yesterday, no work today. Concerning, I suppose, but I decided to take advantage of the downtime and gtfo. Today I'm standing at the elevator banks at about 5:25 (so, early) and lo and behold the managing partner walks by and catches me. Fun stuff.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 8:49 pm
by seespotrun
Big time fuck up, bro. The managing partner was probably impressed that an admin would stay past 5:00.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:00 pm
by orangecup
Oh man, can't believe you didn't get insta-fired.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:18 pm
by gabewatch
Anonymous User wrote:I'll start: Have been at my firm for about a month now. Billed 60+ hours per week for that entire time. No work yesterday, no work today. Concerning, I suppose, but I decided to take advantage of the downtime and gtfo. Today I'm standing at the elevator banks at about 5:25 (so, early) and lo and behold the managing partner walks by and catches me. Fun stuff.
Lol same exact thing happened to me. The MP looked at me and said "Half-day?"

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:51 pm
by Johann
if you clowns weren't bringing work home (i.e. laptop bag), it would look like youre just getting a coffee. now you know not to leave with your work bag. also 4:30 is more believable for late nighter coffee rather than 5:30

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 9:53 pm
by FSK
Johann you need to do a biglaw slacking advice thread

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 10:18 pm
by Traynor Brah
flawschoolkid wrote:Johann you need to do a biglaw slacking advice thread

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Tue Oct 13, 2015 10:41 pm
by lavarman84
I can't imagine myself ever caring about something like that. So...public interest then? :lol:

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 1:33 am
by KMart
Tagging because I think this thread has potential.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:05 am
by Doesthenamematter
Hoping for a competitor to the interview moments thread

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:31 am
by lacrossebrother
I sent the wrong answer to a partner who flipped it to a client who got mad at the partner who got mad at me.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:35 am
by rpupkin
Anonymous User wrote:I'll start: Have been at my firm for about a month now. Billed 60+ hours per week for that entire time. No work yesterday, no work today. Concerning, I suppose, but I decided to take advantage of the downtime and gtfo. Today I'm standing at the elevator banks at about 5:25 (so, early) and lo and behold the managing partner walks by and catches me. Fun stuff.
You have indeed described a fuck-up, but you did not identify it as such. The fuck-up is billing 250+ hours during your first month as an associate. Billing that much during your stub year is the equivalent of a 1L reading each assigned case three times, highlighting the cases with nine different colored highlighters, and then raising his hand every time the professor asks a question in class. You've done tons of work for basically no reason, and now everyone thinks you're weird. I'm sure the billing partner is going to enjoy writing off 80% of your hours.

Relax dude. You'll have plenty of time to suffer over the next five or so years.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 2:38 am
by Tiago Splitter
Billed 40 hours last Friday/Saturday/Sunday which I believe is its own level of fuck up per rpupkin.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 3:00 am
by Johann
Traynor Brah wrote:
flawschoolkid wrote:Johann you need to do a biglaw slacking advice thread
I don't know much and whatever I know I learned from DF. Everything I would say is rather intuitive I just have the balls or apathy to go for it. But I'm sure if you started a thread, DF me and Los blancos would participate. I believe both had less hours than me at September hours check.

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 8:10 am
by NotMyRealName09
JohannDeMann wrote:if you clowns weren't bringing work home (i.e. laptop bag), it would look like youre just getting a coffee. now you know not to leave with your work bag. also 4:30 is more believable for late nighter coffee rather than 5:30
I've totally done this. It's risky because you have to be sure you're not going to need you laptop overnight, but by leaving your laptop on at your desk, it looks like you're still there and must be off doing something work related. What a fucking go-getter, the passing-by partner would think.

It's quite liberating

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 8:15 am
by Danger Zone
Basically same thing as OP but a partner called me out on it.

"What are you doing?"
"...Working from home?"
*scrunches face* "You are?"

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 9:08 am
by Br3v
Danger Zone wrote:Basically same thing as OP but a partner called me out on it.

"What are you doing?"
"...Working from home?"
*scrunches face* "You are?"
Really?

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 9:15 am
by Danger Zone
Br3v wrote:
Danger Zone wrote:Basically same thing as OP but a partner called me out on it.

"What are you doing?"
"...Working from home?"
*scrunches face* "You are?"
Really?
A) is he really a dick? Yes
B) am I really a slacker? Yes
C) did I work from home? Actually, yes, billed nearly 12 hours that day

Re: New associate fuck up thread

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:04 pm
by rpupkin
Danger Zone wrote:
Br3v wrote:
Danger Zone wrote:Basically same thing as OP but a partner called me out on it.

"What are you doing?"
"...Working from home?"
*scrunches face* "You are?"
Really?
A) is he really a dick? Yes
B) am I really a slacker? Yes
C) did I work from home? Actually, yes, billed nearly 12 hours that day
LOL. You have this backwards. He probably scrunched his face because he's wondering why a stub-year associate is taking work home instead of enjoying the evening. Y'all are confused about how this game works.

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:10 pm
by Danger Zone
No. He clarified the next morning when he came into my office and questioned my work ethic, saying that I hadn't established the credibility to work from home yet.

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:16 pm
by rpupkin
Danger Zone wrote:No. He clarified the next morning when he came into my office and questioned my work ethic, saying that I hadn't established the credibility to work from home yet.
I call bullshit. First, no big law partner is going to bother to do this unless you are specifically working on something for him/her. Second, if that really happened, you would have told us in the first place: obviously, a "the partner chewed me out" story is more of a fuck-up than a "the partner scrunched his face at me" story. C'mon dude.

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:18 pm
by brotherdarkness
Danger Zone wrote:No. He clarified the next morning when he came into my office and questioned my work ethic, saying that I hadn't established the credibility to work from home yet.
As in, he doubts that you're capable of working from a couch in addition to a desk chair?

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:26 pm
by Danger Zone
The project was for him. I wouldn't make something like this up because it's not even that funny or unique.

And yeah bd apparently he's one of those weird "face time" people that you hear about occasionally.

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:33 pm
by lawschoolftw
Made 135 copies of long pleading for service without getting client approval first, client refused to pay, firm had to eat cost.

Re: New associate fuck up thread (and tips for slacking)

Posted: Wed Oct 14, 2015 12:39 pm
by dixiecupdrinking
Danger Zone wrote:The project was for him. I wouldn't make something like this up because it's not even that funny or unique.

And yeah bd apparently he's one of those weird "face time" people that you hear about occasionally.
At least he isn't passive aggressive about it.