got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all Forum

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Anonymous User » Mon Aug 04, 2014 11:14 am

mephistopheles wrote: i met people willing to put in 3000+ hours in a year and still approach it with eagerness and appreciation for the opportunities they have.
cool. enjoy WLRK.

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mephistopheles

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by mephistopheles » Mon Aug 04, 2014 11:22 am

Anonymous User wrote:
mephistopheles wrote: i met people willing to put in 3000+ hours in a year and still approach it with eagerness and appreciation for the opportunities they have.
cool. enjoy WLRK.

thanks bro

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Nep11 » Mon Aug 04, 2014 11:42 am

lonerider wrote:You got an offer based on grades you earned over a year ago in classes that have nothing to do with your work. On top of that, you were incompetent over the 10 weeks of summer doing tasks that a paralegal could do.

Work in the job long enough, develop a set of skills, and one day someone will come into your office because they're stuck on a problem and they'd like to hear your opinion, because you know your shit. That's when you should feel good. That's not just law, that goes for anything in life.
+1 This is great for a reality check.

OP - best of luck to you.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by A. Nony Mouse » Mon Aug 04, 2014 11:45 am

Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:02 pm

mephistopheles wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:Also, not sure why someone should feel "bliss" for receiving a biglaw offer. Maybe your firm is magical, Mr. Mistoffelees, but I don't expect much in biglaw's early years to be blissful.

the law firm of Milton, Chadwick & Waters offers a lot, i'll tell you that.

but really, why are you pursuing this path if you're not excited to (a) get the offer, and (b) actually get to work? like, what's the point then?
Because this is the real world and not everyone gets up excited to law in the morning.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:21 pm

A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:42 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
You posted something stupid that you were too scared to take ownership of.

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A. Nony Mouse

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by A. Nony Mouse » Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:44 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:03 pm

Mal Reynolds wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
You posted something stupid that you were too scared to take ownership of.
Nope...just telling the dude to lighten up. I got no problems taking ownership of that.

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Mal Reynolds

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:04 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
Mal Reynolds wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
You posted something stupid that you were too scared to take ownership of.
Nope...just telling the dude to lighten up. I got no problems taking ownership of that.
Then why do it anonymously. And why get mad when you were outed. Seems perfectly within mod discretion.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:06 pm

A. Nony Mouse wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.

Yes, and I was just responding to the fact that you have taken it upon yourself to be the TLS KGB and that is creepy.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by jd20132013 » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:07 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:Re: anon abuse - anyone who's not outed and is posting anon is the OP. I'm not outing the person who started the thread anonymously for a reason.

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.
I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.

Yes, and I was just responding to the fact that you have taken it upon yourself to be the TLS KGB and that is creepy.

or i guess you could call him a kind of "moderator"

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:08 pm

Policing shit heads who abuse the anon function isn't creepy at all. It keeps the forum running.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:08 pm

Wow, anon Nazi. I posted anon by accident. But given the lack of respect for privacy, I'm defiantly not posting anything anon again. If I have sensitive question I'll take it elsewhere.[/quote]

You posted something stupid that you were too scared to take ownership of.[/quote]

Nope...just telling the dude to lighten up. I got no problems taking ownership of that.[/quote]

Then why do it anonymously. And why get mad when you were outed. Seems perfectly within mod discretion.[/quote]

Did you read the part where I said I did it by accident? Just hit the wrong button.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:09 pm

So why are you mad that you got rightfully outed?

SDviaVA

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:10 pm

Mal Reynolds wrote:Policing shit heads who abuse the anon function isn't creepy at all. It keeps the forum running.

I mean if you get off on stuff like that, more power to you I guess.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by TooOld4This » Mon Aug 04, 2014 2:27 pm

OP, you seem to have related to and appreciated the comments that told you what you wanted to hear -- that your feelings (or lack there of) were normal and justified, while getting defensive at the comment that suggested that lack of a positive reaction to an offer didn't bode well for your future at the firm. Having seen lots of people move through the process, I would suggest not being so dismissive of the post you didn't like. People who do well at BigLaw have something besides salary/necessity that they connect with. The people I have know that have been the most miserable and burn out the fastest are the ones that (in retrospect) admit that they felt what you have described -- or worse, a sinking feeling -- from the moment of offer. That moment is when it becomes real. They have committed to a path that they don't pariticularly want, but is safe and well worn and what they are supposed to do as the next thing. They know they would be crazy to pass it up, yet feel a little envious of their peers who find more interesting things to do with their degrees, either because they have more guts, better connections/safety nets, or were forced to because they didn't win the BigLaw lottery. Feeling nothing should be a warning sign that this isn't what you want to be doing. If it's not, you need to go in to the firm with a clear plan of what you want to get out of the experience and what you want next. If you don't, the firm will suck your energy while carrying you out to sea.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Anonymous User » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:20 pm

TooOld4This wrote:OP, you seem to have related to and appreciated the comments that told you what you wanted to hear -- that your feelings (or lack there of) were normal and justified, while getting defensive at the comment that suggested that lack of a positive reaction to an offer didn't bode well for your future at the firm. Having seen lots of people move through the process, I would suggest not being so dismissive of the post you didn't like. People who do well at BigLaw have something besides salary/necessity that they connect with. The people I have know that have been the most miserable and burn out the fastest are the ones that (in retrospect) admit that they felt what you have described -- or worse, a sinking feeling -- from the moment of offer. That moment is when it becomes real. They have committed to a path that they don't pariticularly want, but is safe and well worn and what they are supposed to do as the next thing. They know they would be crazy to pass it up, yet feel a little envious of their peers who find more interesting things to do with their degrees, either because they have more guts, better connections/safety nets, or were forced to because they didn't win the BigLaw lottery. Feeling nothing should be a warning sign that this isn't what you want to be doing. If it's not, you need to go in to the firm with a clear plan of what you want to get out of the experience and what you want next. If you don't, the firm will suck your energy while carrying you out to sea.
kinda nice how it's impossible for me to respond to this without proving your premise that i'm defensive, but i'll take a stab at it:

(1) i didn't say it's a path i didn't want—i have an offer from a firm that's very very strong in the area i want to do— i worked with attorneys in that area and liked it. i did work for attorneys whose lives i would like to have.

(2) i recognize that it's still a hard path and i've done very very little at this point to progress toward anything meaningful. it's not like there's any real talent or skill in what lawyers do for some time into their career. i hope i get to the point where that would be true. but, objectively, a lot of people burn out before they get there

(3) i'm not sure what would be "more interesting" to do with my degree besides things that are totally closed off to me at this point. maybe if i clerk i'll have an opportunity to do some really cool things, but not everyone is going to be able to join a lit boutique or be a WLRK associate

(4) i'm going to continue to laugh at people who just LOVE and RELISH the law so much that they can't admit that, on the whole, the early parts of their career will suck. recognizing that doesn't mean i'm in the wrong field or that i'm doing biglaw for the money. it just means i'm not going to write some bullshit paean to biglaw.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by A. Nony Mouse » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:33 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.
Yes, and I was just responding to the fact that you have taken it upon yourself to be the TLS KGB and that is creepy.
For future reference, part of the mods' job is to deal with anon abuse. If you didn't read the rules about anon use posted at the top of the page in a big yellow box that says the mods can out you, that's not on me. And again, I was responding to user complaints about anon abuse in this thread.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by mephistopheles » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:35 pm

the early parts of one's career only suck if they don't enjoy doing it

hth

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by gk101 » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:37 pm

mephistopheles wrote:the early parts of one's career only suck if they don't enjoy doing it

hth
this is retarded

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by SDviaVA » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:38 pm

A. Nony Mouse wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.
Yes, and I was just responding to the fact that you have taken it upon yourself to be the TLS KGB and that is creepy.
For future reference, part of the mods' job is to deal with anon abuse. If you didn't read the rules about anon use posted at the top of the page in a big yellow box that says the mods can out you, that's not on me. And again, I was responding to user complaints about anon abuse in this thread.

Good work. I think there is a job at the NSA waiting for you.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by Mal Reynolds » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:39 pm

SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:
SDviaVA wrote:
A. Nony Mouse wrote:I was responding to people in this thread (and via reports) who were complaining about the anon abuse in this thread. My whole point was that I wasn't going to out the anon they were complaining about because that anon was the OP and their privacy was worth protecting. I outed you because anon is for posting sensitive employment-related information, none of which was in your post (or this one). Anon is not for random comments telling someone to lighten up.
Yes, and I was just responding to the fact that you have taken it upon yourself to be the TLS KGB and that is creepy.
For future reference, part of the mods' job is to deal with anon abuse. If you didn't read the rules about anon use posted at the top of the page in a big yellow box that says the mods can out you, that's not on me. And again, I was responding to user complaints about anon abuse in this thread.

Good work. I think there is a job at the NSA waiting for you.
Just admit you're dumb and take the L.

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Re: got my offer and I felt literally no joy or relief at all

Post by TooOld4This » Mon Aug 04, 2014 3:49 pm

Anonymous User wrote:
TooOld4This wrote:OP, you seem to have related to and appreciated the comments that told you what you wanted to hear -- that your feelings (or lack there of) were normal and justified, while getting defensive at the comment that suggested that lack of a positive reaction to an offer didn't bode well for your future at the firm. Having seen lots of people move through the process, I would suggest not being so dismissive of the post you didn't like. People who do well at BigLaw have something besides salary/necessity that they connect with. The people I have know that have been the most miserable and burn out the fastest are the ones that (in retrospect) admit that they felt what you have described -- or worse, a sinking feeling -- from the moment of offer. That moment is when it becomes real. They have committed to a path that they don't pariticularly want, but is safe and well worn and what they are supposed to do as the next thing. They know they would be crazy to pass it up, yet feel a little envious of their peers who find more interesting things to do with their degrees, either because they have more guts, better connections/safety nets, or were forced to because they didn't win the BigLaw lottery. Feeling nothing should be a warning sign that this isn't what you want to be doing. If it's not, you need to go in to the firm with a clear plan of what you want to get out of the experience and what you want next. If you don't, the firm will suck your energy while carrying you out to sea.
kinda nice how it's impossible for me to respond to this without proving your premise that i'm defensive, but i'll take a stab at it:

(1) i didn't say it's a path i didn't want—i have an offer from a firm that's very very strong in the area i want to do— i worked with attorneys in that area and liked it. i did work for attorneys whose lives i would like to have.

(2) i recognize that it's still a hard path and i've done very very little at this point to progress toward anything meaningful. it's not like there's any real talent or skill in what lawyers do for some time into their career. i hope i get to the point where that would be true. but, objectively, a lot of people burn out before they get there

(3) i'm not sure what would be "more interesting" to do with my degree besides things that are totally closed off to me at this point. maybe if i clerk i'll have an opportunity to do some really cool things, but not everyone is going to be able to join a lit boutique or be a WLRK associate

(4) i'm going to continue to laugh at people who just LOVE and RELISH the law so much that they can't admit that, on the whole, the early parts of their career will suck. recognizing that doesn't mean i'm in the wrong field or that i'm doing biglaw for the money. it just means i'm not going to write some bullshit paean to biglaw.
Take my advice or don't. I don't really care. All I am saying is that in the (many) years I have watched new attorneys come up through the ranks, what you have described is a warning sign of finding the BigLaw environment less tolerable than most (and that's not saying others have rose colored glasses on, though some do).

My advice is to think about what your goals really are and what skills you want to get. Go into BigLaw with an agenda and some sense of what's next. It won't hurt you if it turns out you find you like the job. It will be time that is immensely helpful if you find it even more soul crush than you seem to expect. (Read the thread about quitting with no plan to get a sense of what it can be like if you burn out without having planned for the possibility).

You seem to think your apathy is realism that will help you when you start. I hope you are right. In my experience, it is also an early sign that a person will look to jump out of the firm ASAP. IMHO, it is always better to set yourself up to jump to something rather than from something.

Seriously? What are you waiting for?

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