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SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 1:50 pm
by Anonymous User
SA at a V10 in major market. Aside from the work itself (which is decent to good and I've had no issue with), I'm feeling suffocated by the social environment of the firm.

Basically, the culture here is so bland and sterile that I can't tolerate it. I've found through experience that conversations with associates need to be about polite, G-rated shit, with no exceptions. It's like nobody has any edge or color to their personality (or if they do, have learned not to express it). People come off as flat and uninteresting, and the small talk is intolerable. If I'm forced to have one more conversation w an associate about how pleasant the weather was this weekend, I'm gonna lose it.

I'm still expecting to get an offer, but I guess I have this weird fear that spending long weeks in an office of social zombies will turn me into one of them. Given that I'm finding the work itself fine, would I be crazy to turn down the offer for this reason? Anyone else want to speak to a similar experience?

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:00 pm
by Anonymous User
Anonymous User wrote: I guess I have this weird fear that spending long weeks in an office of social zombies will turn me into one of them.
Hope, don't fear. If you turn into one of them it will stop bothering you.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:01 pm
by 09042014
friends dont let friends Cleary.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:03 pm
by brazleton
.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:20 pm
by Anonymous User
I don't know if I'd describe my firm quite as badly as you have, but many have called it sterile, etc.
for me, that was perfect: I want to get my work done and get out of there as soon as practicable. if i have time to go to happy hour, I'd rather go with friends that aren't associated with work.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:39 pm
by Anonymous User
Anonymous User wrote:I don't know if I'd describe my firm quite as badly as you have, but many have called it sterile, etc.
for me, that was perfect: I want to get my work done and get out of there as soon as practicable. if i have time to go to happy hour, I'd rather go with friends that aren't associated with work.
Couldn't agree more. I'm looking for a firm like this.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 2:49 pm
by Anonymous User
Anon wrote:I don't know if I'd describe my firm quite as badly as you have, but many have called it sterile, etc.
for me, that was perfect: I want to get my work done and get out of there as soon as practicable. if i have time to go to happy hour, I'd rather go with friends that aren't associated with work.
The irony is that both you and OP may be referring to exactly the same firm. Have you recently talked about weather with an intern?

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 3:01 pm
by NYSprague
Turning down an office full of bland people with good work would be an insanely stupid move.

bland >>> entertaining assholes

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 3:45 pm
by Anonymous User
I would love to work for a firm full of "bland" individuals talking about the weather. Polite > idiots trying to be cool/ reliving their youth/ thinking they're witty or charismatic.

Any chance OP is one of those guys who likes to talk about their *** escapades?

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 3:50 pm
by Anonymous User
My office is the same. I feel your pain OP. However, i did find some more interesting people to work with now that I'm nearing the end of the summer. Everyone's is just a little too polite and formal for me.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:00 pm
by peanut123
Why not go through 3L OCI and see what else presents itself as an option and go from there? Or maybe look into clerking and reapplying during the clerkship when you have an idea of what you really want. Just because other people think that sounds like a great environment doesn't mean it's a good fit for you. But yes, it would be crazy to just flat out turn them down without something else lined up.

That said, if you're at a big firm in a big market, there are definitely going to be other people at the firm you can relate to and whose company you would enjoy, but the large size can make it hard to find. Have you looked into their affinity groups? I summered at a firm with a stuffy reputation and even they had running clubs, softball, etc.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:52 pm
by dixiecupdrinking
Nothing worse than sitting alone in your office working on a brief/reviewing documents in close proximity to boring people. Much better to have a fun loving guy in the silent office next to yours.

Edit: To be less snarky: the social environment will never again impact your life like it does as a summer. It just doesn't matter. If your colleagues are pleasant people then count your blessings.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 5:16 pm
by Anonymous User
You're not alone bro. I was hoping to find a couple younger people at my firm to go out and ball it up with once in a while... nope... at my firm every single person's married probably with kids. Even if you go out drinking, they spend half the time worrying about their wife, not to mention wrapping up by 8pm or so.

I think some firms just have this kind of culture where no one really likes to have a good time.

Especially when you're moving to a new city to work, it'd be nice to meet some bros to chill with at work I mean where tf else do you these days? Idk man, just know you're not alone.

edit... V50 north east large office

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 5:23 pm
by RedGiant
Anonymous User wrote:SA at a V10 in major market. Aside from the work itself (which is decent to good and I've had no issue with), I'm feeling suffocated by the social environment of the firm.

Basically, the culture here is so bland and sterile that I can't tolerate it. I've found through experience that conversations with associates need to be about polite, G-rated shit, with no exceptions. It's like nobody has any edge or color to their personality (or if they do, have learned not to express it). People come off as flat and uninteresting, and the small talk is intolerable. If I'm forced to have one more conversation w an associate about how pleasant the weather was this weekend, I'm gonna lose it.

I'm still expecting to get an offer, but I guess I have this weird fear that spending long weeks in an office of social zombies will turn me into one of them. Given that I'm finding the work itself fine, would I be crazy to turn down the offer for this reason? Anyone else want to speak to a similar experience?
I've worked in biglaw for a long time as a paralegal and I can tell you that you will find some kindred spirits at every firm, but likely not right away. There are cool people but you have to suss them out. They also may be at your firm but in a different office. They exist. One thing I am getting from your post is that you are "not like them." This is a red flag, and I would definitely try to interview as a 3L to find a better fit (after you collect an offer from your SA).

Many biglaw folks spend so much time at the office that they prefer to save their socializing for their "real" friends. If this is how your firm is, you might prefer somewhere that associates are a smidge more lively!

Also, and I am not saying your not a good judge, but sometimes how people treat interns/SAs is different than how things would be if you joined. Perhaps people were warned to talk about pleasant, non-controversial things to, say, keep them from b_tcihng about the firm in front of SAs. Only you can judge if that might be what's going on.

Good luck...but remember that you'll do best at work if you feel comfortable, and it sounds like you're not fully comfortable there. I'm not saying you should throw away a good paying job--it's just one aspect to consider....

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 7:44 pm
by Anonymous User
Desert Fox wrote:friends dont let friends Cleary.
Could be DPW. That said: better than the orgy that's Quinn.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 2:00 pm
by Anonymous User
Desert Fox wrote:friends dont let friends Cleary.
Yeahhh actually can't be Cleary. The amount of super awkward weirdos there makes convos anything but boring. Uncomfortable maybe.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 2:42 pm
by TooOld4This
Yes, you would be incredibly stupid for turning down the offer without something else lined up. You also don't seem to get that an SA is a 3 month interview. People are going to be more formal until you are actually working there.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 2:49 pm
by dixiecupdrinking
TooOld4This wrote:Yes, you would be incredibly stupid for turning down the offer without something else lined up. You also don't seem to get that an SA is a 3 month interview. People are going to be more formal until you are actually working there.
also this.

I have stilted, uncomfortable conversations with summers because they are fucking uptight because they don't want to rock the boat and won't contribute anything even marginally off message, and I don't want to offend them or push them into saying something that they might regret. Doesn't mean I am boring.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 5:14 pm
by oblig.lawl.ref
Anonymous User wrote:I would love to work for a firm full of "bland" individuals talking about the weather. Polite > idiots trying to be cool/ reliving their youth/ thinking they're witty or charismatic.

Any chance OP is one of those guys who likes to talk about their *** escapades?
lol, this is exactly what i thought reading OP.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 6:41 pm
by DELG
ugh, professionalism, so boring

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 7:30 pm
by BigRob
Imagine you had median grades from a t2/t3 and were lucky enough to get a job at a small firm with a supervisor who was as terrible an attorney as he was a person. You'd sit in your tiny cubicle in your cheap, uncomfortable chair for ten hours a day doing meaningless work for $40k/year. Sometimes you'd browse TLS at lunch, see threads like this, and cry silently to yourself.

Feel better, OP?

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 8:16 pm
by eastcoast_iub
dixiecupdrinking wrote:
TooOld4This wrote:Yes, you would be incredibly stupid for turning down the offer without something else lined up. You also don't seem to get that an SA is a 3 month interview. People are going to be more formal until you are actually working there.
also this.

I have stilted, uncomfortable conversations with summers because they are fucking uptight because they don't want to rock the boat and won't contribute anything even marginally off message, and I don't want to offend them or push them into saying something that they might regret. Doesn't mean I am boring.
1000% this.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 8:38 pm
by Anonymous User
Anonymous User wrote:
Desert Fox wrote:friends dont let friends Cleary.
Yeahhh actually can't be Cleary. The amount of super awkward weirdos there makes convos anything but boring. Uncomfortable maybe.
Lol, why is this a thing? It's so accurate though. My Cleary callback was one of the worst callbacks I went on. you're supposed to send the "cool" associates to the lunch, right? we must have different thoughts on cool

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 9:53 pm
by 84651846190
Biglaw firms don't (or shouldn't) pay you to "socialize." You get paid to work. Socialize outside of work like every other normal human being. Ironically, it's the social retards who are usually the ones concerned about the social aspects of work because they literally have no friends outside of work or find it hard to make friends outside of work. People are supposed to be polite, professional and "G-rated" at a biglaw firm (and every fucking corporate job, for that matter). That's just the way people have been conditioned to interact with each other, unless you're at a startup or something that's 95% white male SEC frat bro types.

You're not in school anymore, shitheads. This is the way people act at work.

Re: SA finding law firm social wasteland

Posted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 10:00 pm
by 84651846190
Anonymous User wrote:You're not alone bro. I was hoping to find a couple younger people at my firm to go out and ball it up with once in a while... nope... at my firm every single person's married probably with kids. Even if you go out drinking, they spend half the time worrying about their wife, not to mention wrapping up by 8pm or so.

I think some firms just have this kind of culture where no one really likes to have a good time.

Especially when you're moving to a new city to work, it'd be nice to meet some bros to chill with at work I mean where tf else do you these days? Idk man, just know you're not alone.

edit... V50 north east large office
Yeah, because all family time is, by definition, not having a "good time."