Being ill in biglaw
Posted: Mon Mar 11, 2013 12:00 am
I posted here on TLS while dealing with serious illness. After finally going back to work a few months ago and realizing that people at many biglaw firms end up missing major time due to illness, I understand that it won't be easy to out me from my posts. No one else at my firm knows or cares about TLS. So I thought that maybe no one else can give you this insight, for what it is worth. My illness isn't related to firm hours but firms know that biglaw eats people up. So people get sick, break down, quit, etc. All part of the place.
Here is are some basic facts:
1. You will have disability coverage which is based on some amount of salary and bonus. So you will have income. I didn't have any debt but there might be some kind of disability thing which allows you to defer loans.
2. You are much better off not working than trying to work part time. Part time in biglaw is at least 40 hours. People, no matter how much they love you and want to work with you, will hate having to work around a schedule so you can go home at a certain time. It is really hard to set up deals to work on that kind of a schedule. It is better for the firm if you aren't there.
3. You probably will have a very high hurdle to overcome in terms of getting back on track, getting staffed on the best deals, etc. Just keep proving you are still extremely brilliant and do great work. Make sure you work is flawless, timely and never act like you are any different than before you left.
4. Try to do CLE courses and stuff online so you know something. Also to relieve boredom. I did a little class for corporate on letters of credit, and on some loan agreement provisions, which seems like nothing, but it was something I learned through online CLE and was able to go over with people. Not the greatest topic but it was something. I also went to city bar events just to stay involved in professional activities.
5. Stay in contact with the partners and HR. They will give you a lot of support.
6. I have found fatigue to be a big problem. I have been able to work around this for the past few months. Those days are ending and I have to be super super organized to manage my time perfectly. But the other part is, a large part of me doesn't want to have to work all night or all weekend at the drop of a hat. My longest stretch was a deal when I worked literally for 3 days with almost no sleep. I categorically feel that I couldn't do that again. I am not sure how I will manage my life and assignments so I can avoid this. ( There is one client who had a heart attack as a younger guy, he refuses to work more than certain hours and goes home, but he is a client and I'm not.) Right now I am staying extremely organized to manage my work hours. But I can't rely on anything about illness because that makes it seem I can't do the work.If I can't do the work, I shouldn't be there.
7. You can't compare yourself to other people from your class. They will be ahead of you. I was asked to go back a year when I returned. Which I didn't want to do, but it makes sense. The firm pitched it as an extra year to make partner: but I feel that making partner now is even more unlikely. I don't know if I can do the insane senior hours needed to make a run for partner and I don't know even if I made partner, if I could work even harder as a junior partner. Making partner is just something no one can count on other than the few prodigies. My firm has two or three prodigies, sometimes they make partner early.
8. What I know about the partners: they all have extremely high energy and ability to work hours without fatigue; they don't want to have to accommodate people beyond a short period of time ( though as people they care about you and your well-being a great deal and are invested in your getting better.) They are never to give you a pass for subpar work, so you can't go back to work until you feel that you can do your best work. In short, don't fuck up and don't ever complain about being tired.
9. If you made friends with clients, try to stay in touch with them in a non-annoying way. They care about you too, but you are off their radar. I did some stuff like send articles I found of interest to them and sent cards. Had lunch a few times. Just stay on the radar. Be professional
10. This one isn't about being ill, but the most important thing to always remember about partners ( and other associates) they can all do the same work you are doing. They don't need you; you are never ever essential to them. Never feel that you can't be replaced.
Here is are some basic facts:
1. You will have disability coverage which is based on some amount of salary and bonus. So you will have income. I didn't have any debt but there might be some kind of disability thing which allows you to defer loans.
2. You are much better off not working than trying to work part time. Part time in biglaw is at least 40 hours. People, no matter how much they love you and want to work with you, will hate having to work around a schedule so you can go home at a certain time. It is really hard to set up deals to work on that kind of a schedule. It is better for the firm if you aren't there.
3. You probably will have a very high hurdle to overcome in terms of getting back on track, getting staffed on the best deals, etc. Just keep proving you are still extremely brilliant and do great work. Make sure you work is flawless, timely and never act like you are any different than before you left.
4. Try to do CLE courses and stuff online so you know something. Also to relieve boredom. I did a little class for corporate on letters of credit, and on some loan agreement provisions, which seems like nothing, but it was something I learned through online CLE and was able to go over with people. Not the greatest topic but it was something. I also went to city bar events just to stay involved in professional activities.
5. Stay in contact with the partners and HR. They will give you a lot of support.
6. I have found fatigue to be a big problem. I have been able to work around this for the past few months. Those days are ending and I have to be super super organized to manage my time perfectly. But the other part is, a large part of me doesn't want to have to work all night or all weekend at the drop of a hat. My longest stretch was a deal when I worked literally for 3 days with almost no sleep. I categorically feel that I couldn't do that again. I am not sure how I will manage my life and assignments so I can avoid this. ( There is one client who had a heart attack as a younger guy, he refuses to work more than certain hours and goes home, but he is a client and I'm not.) Right now I am staying extremely organized to manage my work hours. But I can't rely on anything about illness because that makes it seem I can't do the work.If I can't do the work, I shouldn't be there.
7. You can't compare yourself to other people from your class. They will be ahead of you. I was asked to go back a year when I returned. Which I didn't want to do, but it makes sense. The firm pitched it as an extra year to make partner: but I feel that making partner now is even more unlikely. I don't know if I can do the insane senior hours needed to make a run for partner and I don't know even if I made partner, if I could work even harder as a junior partner. Making partner is just something no one can count on other than the few prodigies. My firm has two or three prodigies, sometimes they make partner early.
8. What I know about the partners: they all have extremely high energy and ability to work hours without fatigue; they don't want to have to accommodate people beyond a short period of time ( though as people they care about you and your well-being a great deal and are invested in your getting better.) They are never to give you a pass for subpar work, so you can't go back to work until you feel that you can do your best work. In short, don't fuck up and don't ever complain about being tired.
9. If you made friends with clients, try to stay in touch with them in a non-annoying way. They care about you too, but you are off their radar. I did some stuff like send articles I found of interest to them and sent cards. Had lunch a few times. Just stay on the radar. Be professional
10. This one isn't about being ill, but the most important thing to always remember about partners ( and other associates) they can all do the same work you are doing. They don't need you; you are never ever essential to them. Never feel that you can't be replaced.