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Socialization as an SA
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 3:53 pm
by Anonymous User
This is the part of being a summer associate that freaks me out the most - I just find this aspect of it a painful prospect. I am the type of person who just likes to sit and do my work/eat lunch at my desk. Then again, I am not a total social misfit, but function better in smaller groups, work better alone, am the stereotypical quiet/shy female engineer, and have Asperger's. I have a tendency to clam up and be silent in uncomfortable situations (when I feel like I don't know enough about the conversation, in the face of high levels of snobbery, and talking to attractive men makes me blush even though I have a serious boyfriend). I am going to a very very techy firm in patent lit, so that is probably going to help.
Anyone have any tips on getting through those events as well as lunch/daily social life as an SA? I am concerned that being so shy and focused could hurt my chances at an offer....
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 4:56 pm
by Kohinoor
Anonymous User wrote:This is the part of being a summer associate that freaks me out the most - I just find this aspect of it a painful prospect. I am the type of person who just likes to sit and do my work/eat lunch at my desk. Then again, I am not a total social misfit, but function better in smaller groups, work better alone, am the stereotypical quiet/shy female engineer, and have Asperger's. I have a tendency to clam up and be silent in uncomfortable situations (when I feel like I don't know enough about the conversation, in the face of high levels of snobbery, and talking to attractive men makes me blush even though I have a serious boyfriend). I am going to a very very techy firm in patent lit, so that is probably going to help.
Anyone have any tips on getting through those events as well as lunch/daily social life as an SA? I am concerned that being so shy and focused could hurt my chances at an offer....
If you're not a total social misfit, you're already ahead of the game. I suspect being nervous around attractive men will not pose a problem for you unless pudgy and untanned does it for you.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2011 5:19 pm
by sundance95
Anonymous User wrote:I...have Asperger's.
Being well-liked and sociable will always be an advantage in any career. Yours is no exception. That said, if you suffer from a condition like Asperger's, TLS probably isn't the place to be seeking advice on how to improve your social skills. From what I understand (which is admittedly not much), you'd want to talk to a professional, and probably do some cognitive behavioral therapy, to improve your skills. HTH.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 5:09 pm
by westbayguy
"I am going to a very very techy firm in patent lit, so that is probably going to help."
End of Problem- you'll fit right in

Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 5:20 pm
by Stanislaw Carter
If you actually, certifiably, have aspergers, see a professional as soon as possible.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 5:27 pm
by barry
sundance95 wrote:Anonymous User wrote:I...have Asperger's.
Being well-liked and sociable will always be an advantage in any career. Yours is no exception. That said, if you suffer from a condition like Asperger's, TLS probably isn't the place to be seeking advice on how to improve your social skills. From what I understand (which is admittedly not much), you'd want to talk to a professional, and probably do some cognitive behavioral therapy, to improve your skills. HTH.
lol i would bet the majority of TLS is aspie to some degree even if they're not aware of it
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 6:51 pm
by Big Shrimpin
These threads continue to amaze me.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 7:10 pm
by zomginternets
Stanislaw Carter wrote:If you actually, certifiably, have aspergers, see a professional as soon as possible.
I don't think many people just "claim" to have Asperger's without having actually been diagnosed with it (unlike ADD/ADHD), so I'm sure she's seen one and probably has been seeing one for quite a while.
OP: I'm assuming you already got the SA position for this summer. I think if you appeared sociable enough in the interview to get the summer SA offer, I wouldn't worry too much. If your work product/ethic is good, then I doubt you'd get dinged/no-offered because you are quiet. (Making partner might be a different question though.)
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 7:49 pm
by dood
just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 7:52 pm
by MrPapagiorgio
dood wrote:just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
Huh?
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:01 pm
by dood
MrPapagiorgio wrote:dood wrote:just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
Huh?
u soak a tampon in vodka and shove it in ur butt, where the alchohol gets absorbed rectally.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:05 pm
by Big Shrimpin
dood wrote:MrPapagiorgio wrote:dood wrote:just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
Huh?
u soak a tampon in vodka and shove it in ur butt, where the alchohol gets absorbed rectally.
tyft
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:12 pm
by baboon309
dood wrote:MrPapagiorgio wrote:dood wrote:just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
Huh?
u soak a tampon in vodka and shove it in ur butt, where the alchohol gets absorbed rectally.
It`s popular in Germany~
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Fri Apr 29, 2011 8:15 pm
by Kohinoor
dood wrote:just be semi-drunk all the time, the ol tampon in ass trick works great so others can't smell the booze on ur breathe.
They may figure it out anyway. That trick doesn't get you semi-drunk.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 12:48 pm
by RVP11
Anonymous User wrote:have Asperger's...am going to a very very techy firm in patent lit
I think you'll be okay.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:00 pm
by Anonymous User
I think I'll skip drinking heavily/other alcohol related advice.
Yeah, I've gotten treatment for Asperger's, but I still am a solitary, quiet type.
I overlooked the nature of my firm - not all firm cultures are the same, I know, but....
I think what made me completely freak out (instead of just being nervous) was attending a firm event with my boyfriend that literally made me uncomfortable to the point of nausea. He is a patent lit assoc at a big firm, but it is one of the most intense/old-fashioned firms out there, and with a reputation for being pretty douchey. I couldn't imagine having to interact with those people on a daily basis. I am hopeful that my firm is be different, and from the firm events of my own firm that I have been to - this is likely true.
My backup plan is to switch to patent prosecution (I think I made a mistake doing lit), but I don't know how feasible that is as a summer in a firm where the two groups are totally separate.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:18 pm
by dood
i dont believe u have asbergers, as all the aspies i know are incoherent and do not have BFs. pictures of urself or we dont believe u.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:23 pm
by Kohinoor
dood wrote:i dont believe u have asbergers, as all the aspies i know are incoherent and do not have BFs. pictures of urself or we dont believe u.
Picture of aspergers?
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:26 pm
by dood
Kohinoor wrote:dood wrote:i dont believe u have asbergers, as all the aspies i know are incoherent and do not have BFs. pictures of urself or we dont believe u.
Picture of aspergers?
no, pics of her. cause u can totally tell.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:30 pm
by Anonymous User
Not that appearance and Asperger's have any correlation, but I have been (degradingly) described to by my classmates as "like a Barbie doll." I am confused by this because I am not blond. But that should give an idea of my general appearance.
Boyfriend is also a bit on the aspie side, although hasn't been diagnosed. Like me, he prefers gaming and reading tech blogs/discussing such things to social interaction, which is why we get along.

Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:31 pm
by Kohinoor
Anonymous User wrote:Not that appearance and Asperger's have any correlation, but I have been (degradingly) described to by my classmates as "like a Barbie doll." I am confused by this because I am not blond. But that should give an idea of my general appearance.
Boyfriend is also a bit on the aspie side, although hasn't been diagnosed. Like me, he prefers gaming and reading tech blogs/discussing such things to social interaction, which is why we get along.

dood is right. bikini pics are going to be the only way to help you here.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:33 pm
by dood
Anonymous User wrote:Not that appearance and Asperger's have any correlation, but I have been (degradingly) described to by my classmates as "like a Barbie doll." I am confused by this because I am not blond. But that should give an idea of my general appearance.
Boyfriend is also a bit on the aspie side, although hasn't been diagnosed. Like me, he prefers gaming and reading tech blogs/discussing such things to social interaction, which is why we get along.

NO WAY. NO WAY. ur blowing my mind right now. but now u must poast pics. i have never met an attractive aspie person.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:33 pm
by Stanislaw Carter
i dont believe u have asbergers, as all the aspies i know are incoherent and do not have BFs. pictures of urself or we dont believe u.
If a girl is hot, she can have aspergers out the wazoo, but she can easily get a boyfriend if she wants one.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:34 pm
by Anonymous User
Boys boys boys. You know that isn't going to happen. I am posting anonymously for a reason - I don't want to proclaim my social ineptitude to the world.
Re: Socialization as an SA
Posted: Sat Apr 30, 2011 4:35 pm
by dood
Anonymous User wrote:Boys boys boys. You know that isn't going to happen. I am posting anonymously for a reason - I don't want to proclaim my social ineptitude to the world.
ok ok, then can we have a Q&A session?
1. when were u diagnosed?
2. were u popular in HS?