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Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:24 pm
by TTH
Hi Guys,

I did a search and read a couple threads on this topic already, so I apologize for retreading old ground, but I want some advice.

Situation: 0L, just proposed to my girlfriend last night. She said yes. :) We don't want a super-long engagement (i.e. until after lawl skool). We would like to elope, taking only a few very close family members either to Spain or Latin America. We're looking at either summer 11 or summer 12. Summer break at my law school was 13 weeks this year, and I assume that will hold steady (spring finals 2nd week of may, 1st week of fall classes 3rd week of august).

Here's my questions:

1. ITE, is it a terrible idea to ask to start a summer program late/end early for a wedding if the summer program I'm offered is an 11 or 12 week program. (We would likely want two weeks to have the wedding/honeymoon)

2. Is bringing this up in an interview a super-terrible idea, or is it a worse idea to get the offer then bring it up (thus seeming like I'm sandbagging them)?

3. Are firms in secondary markets more likely to be flexible/less likely to hold it against an SA than big-market firms?

4. Would non-paying 1L employers (judges etc) be much more flexible with regards to time of program?

Thanks guys.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:26 pm
by merichard87
Do it the summer after 1L. You probably won't have shit else to do anyway.

Congrats! :D

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:33 pm
by bex
Congrats!

I agree, do it after 1L, not after 2L, which is much more important. Nonpaying jobs are probably much more flexible with taking 2 weeks off. Maybe you could bring it up if they ask your availability; say you have your wedding planned already.

Any chance you could have the wedding over winter break, which would eliminate this issue, or do the few people who would be joining you have problems with that?

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:35 pm
by jks289
Congratulations!

I wouldn't bring it up in an interview. Maybe wait to make flight reservations until you talk to someone at your school's CSO about how to best approach it. People get married, have babies, etc all the time. If you are reasonable about it I doubt it would be a real issue.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:36 pm
by paratactical
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Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:37 pm
by PKSebben
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Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:38 pm
by hellokitty
Awwwww. Congratulations! Reading this made me smile. Sorry I can't offer advice, but seriously :mrgreen: .

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 1:42 pm
by HBK
Congrats! I, a 0L, got engaged last December, and we decided with LS and the move to put it off till 1L summer. We picked May 21st to allow time for a wind down from finals, the LR write-on, and still have time for a 1L summer job.

If you think you'll want to try for law review, find out what their write-on timeframes are.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 2:02 pm
by b1ue
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Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 2:04 pm
by jks289
b1ue wrote:seek out refundable deposits. 1L kills relationships.
Do you need a hug? You seem fussy.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 2:07 pm
by b1ue
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Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 3:20 pm
by Posner
TTH wrote: Here's my questions:

1. ITE, is it a terrible idea to ask to start a summer program late/end early for a wedding if the summer program I'm offered is an 11 or 12 week program. (We would likely want two weeks to have the wedding/honeymoon)

2. Is bringing this up in an interview a super-terrible idea, or is it a worse idea to get the offer then bring it up (thus seeming like I'm sandbagging them)?

3. Are firms in secondary markets more likely to be flexible/less likely to hold it against an SA than big-market firms?

4. Would non-paying 1L employers (judges etc) be much more flexible with regards to time of program?

Thanks guys.
First, congratulations. Don't worry about 1L and your relationship. As long as you go into with the understanding that you won't be able to spend a lot of time together you'll be fine if your relationship is strong. This is especially true if you are living together, because it's easier to spend short stints of time together.


1. Arguably yes if you are a 1L summer associate, but it is probably unlikely (even if you are going to a top school) unless you have serious connections. In better economies, I know this wasn't a big deal, but have heard that in this economy it's a bad idea. If you are up front about it and they hire you then I wouldn't imagine that it would be as big of a deal.

2. I'd be up front about it, but that's just me. I'd rather go into the working relationship with open and honest expectations. If you get hired, they can't hold it against you. Getting a 1L SA is great if you can do it, but ultimately your biggest fear should be a no-offer 1L SA. For 2L OCI, I don't think a 1L SA will give you much of a bump over a judge (if any).

3. No idea.

4. Definitely, definitely more flexible.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 4:38 pm
by pehaigllleises
You won't need two weeks off anyway. I'm a rising 2L getting married in a month. My wedding is the Saturday smack in between the two weeks of OCI. I will be interviewing the day before the wedding, running home to make my bouquet, and then running off to the rehearsal. It's not fun, but definitely do it 1L summer rather than 2L summer.

And I'm the hetero-female party to the relationship who drives herself nuts with details and DIY projects. If your relationship also fits that bill, what does she do for a living/for school? She will probably be the one who is busy leading up to the wedding. You will, for the most part, only have to do what she asks you to help with.

You can always do your honeymoon later. In fact, I'd recommend putting it off until your next convenient spring break or so. In addition to your 1L job you will have to worry about the journal write on, your bid list, and OCI your 1L summer.

In my experience and my fiance's experience (as a first year surgical intern--also not a very friendly environment) people are overly accommodating with your schedule when they hear that you need it for your wedding day.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 4:49 pm
by animalcrkrs
Make sure it's not late summer...I know two couples getting married before school starts DURING first round OCI. Terrible timing.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Thu Jul 08, 2010 4:53 pm
by Hamilton
Get married in May right after your write-on competition finishes and before Memorial Day (when most summer jobs start). Then, there's no worry to tell employers, because they wont want you working then anyway.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 10:17 am
by Anonymous User
You're so F'd dude.

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 10:17 am
by Rocketman11
Anonymous User wrote:You're so F'd dude.
This was me

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 11:07 am
by TTH
Rocketman11 wrote:
Anonymous User wrote:You're so F'd dude.
This was me
When I saw it before I scrolled, I said to myself "Rocket or Wake."

Re: Moar Wedding Questions

Posted: Fri Jul 09, 2010 11:29 am
by romothesavior
Congrats!

And thanks for making me realize how very very alone I am.