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Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:23 pm
by anonymousquestion
hi, i've deleted my original post to get rid of guesses about either my identity or university.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:26 pm
by anonymousquestion
I have the #'s for a T-10. Will the events outlined and described within this letter at least still get me into a T-20... or should I expect to be out of the first tier?

Also, what can I do to improve it? Although all factually correct and honestly reflecting my thoughts, would you recommend a more apologetic approach if I would have to be dishonest to write such an approach?

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:27 pm
by jayn3
make it shorter.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:28 pm
by kalvano
Ow. My eyes. Summarize this.

Also, your university sucks, getting involved in your personal life with the dirty slut.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:28 pm
by romothesavior
--ImageRemoved--

But I will give you credit, this flame was actually pretty entertaining to read.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:30 pm
by anonymousquestion
romothesavior wrote:--ImageRemoved--

But I will give you credit, this flame was actually pretty entertaining to read.
what are you talking about? this really happened, and i'm looking for responsive feedback on how to make it better.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:31 pm
by anonymousquestion
kalvano wrote:Ow. My eyes. Summarize this.

Also, your university sucks, getting involved in your personal life with the dirty slut.
what can i summarize? will law schools care being this was my personal life?

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:32 pm
by richardfitzwell
Since when does the University of Phoenix Online have an elevator?

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:32 pm
by kalvano
Summarize what you wrote. You wrote too much for people to read it.


Also, pics of said dirty slut.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:33 pm
by lawschoolstudent85
,,,

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:33 pm
by jayn3
kalvano wrote:Summarize what you wrote. You wrote too much for people to read it.


Also, pics of said dirty slut.
titcr

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:33 pm
by anonymousquestion
richardfitzwell wrote:Since when does the University of Pheniox Online have an elevator?
try a top 20 university, dummy. if you do not have anything constructive about what is listed, please do not state your opinion.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:34 pm
by dk8
pretty shitty that you were suspended for saying that to your ex-gf. i wonder if a girl would have been suspended for insulting you or talking about your sexual habits? probably not.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:34 pm
by 06132010
did you just imply that your university's suspension policy is bound by the Constitution?

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:35 pm
by anonymousquestion
dk8 wrote:pretty shitty that you were suspended for saying that to your ex-gf. i wonder if a girl would have been suspended for insulting you or talking about your sexual habits? probably not.
she had, but i don't think it's important to bring out the double standard. it's expected for there to be a double standard in such circumstances.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:35 pm
by richardfitzwell
anonymousquestion wrote:
richardfitzwell wrote:Since when does the University of Pheniox Online have an elevator?
try a top 20 university, dummy. if you do not have anything constructive about what is listed, please do not state your opinion.

shitty flame.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:36 pm
by anonymousquestion
booyakasha45 wrote:did you just imply that your university's suspension policy is bound by the Constitution?
according to previous cases, i had the understanding that it is at least in regard to the vagueness doctrine -- that you can't punish a student unless that student knows darn well what s/he did is punishable. this is also a principle invoked in foreign, biblical and islamic law fyi.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:36 pm
by traehekat
Wait, this is the actual addendum?

I didn't read it, but I'll tell you now it is way, way too long. If you committed triple homicide you wouldn't need an addendum this long.

With any addendum one of your main concerns should always be to write concisely. They have enough stuff to read.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:37 pm
by dk8
anonymousquestion wrote:
dk8 wrote:pretty shitty that you were suspended for saying that to your ex-gf. i wonder if a girl would have been suspended for insulting you or talking about your sexual habits? probably not.
she had, but i don't think it's important to bring out the double standard. it's expected for there to be a double standard in such circumstances.
you're right, definitely don't talk about it in your addendum.

what did she do, run to the university officials and complain? this girl sounds terrible. first she sluts it up on you then gets you suspended for calling her out on it.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:37 pm
by romothesavior
Okay bro-ski... if you really aren't a flame, you need to SERIOUSLY re-work this entire thing. Get it down to a paragraph, maybe two at most. And don't write like this:
anonymousquestion wrote: Upset at the discovery of this information, I confided in several friends of mine who made a slanderous facebook page that posited my girlfriend in a way that was both dishonorable and unmerited.

A week later, I exited one of my classes and upon coming off the elevator, saw my ex-girlfriend. Angered by the aforementioned statements and sanction, I acted in awful judgment and referred to her as a “dirty slut.”

However, after reviewing both the full weight of my castigation as well as the events immediately preceding it, I have come to view my suspension as a blessing.

...it became evident that under emotional stress I had a tendency to revert to childish tendencies that were both unkind and capable of placing insurmountable locks upon my future success.

Through this research my interest in law, which admittedly was initially amateur, quickly proliferated.

I am far too driven in my desire to practice law, and far too grateful for any who assist me in evolving this dream into a reality to let anything handicap my ability to achieve the highest academic standing possible within your esteemed law program.
Sentences like these make you sound douchetastic and will make adcomms lulzy. And nobody wants to hear about your religious background, your philosophies on ethical and legal justice, or The Consumer Protection Act of 2002. Just the facts, please.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:38 pm
by Miniver
...

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:39 pm
by anonymousquestion
traehekat wrote:Wait, this is the actual addendum?

I didn't read it, but I'll tell you now it is way, way too long. If you committed triple homicide you wouldn't need an addendum this long.

With any addendum one of our main concerns should always be to write concisely. They have enough stuff to read.
should i take out the part with previous cases and applicable laws? my intent was to show that what was done to me was wrong, as well as show i have at least some true interest in law. however, taking your comment into account, i guess they don't care about my legal interpretation.

you'd recommend deleting it?

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:40 pm
by 06132010
anonymousquestion wrote:this is also a principle invoked in foreign, biblical and islamic law fyi.
thanks for the relevant information.

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:40 pm
by romothesavior
richardfitzwell wrote:Since when does the University of Phoenix Online have an elevator?
177.

And yes, pics of dirty slut, preferably pics of when she was being "physically intimate with several other individuals."

Re: Addendum For Suspension

Posted: Sat Jun 12, 2010 3:40 pm
by jayn3
anonymousquestion wrote:they don't care about my legal interpretation.