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Hey everyone,

Relatively new to this TLS game. I was just beginning to formulate ideas for my PS and came across one that will perhaps work, but I'd appreciate input on whether it is appropriate or not.

I was considering writing about the day that my father became handicapped. I was preparing for my first day at a different branch after receiving a big promotion to supervisor when I heard aggressive knocking on my door. It was my elderly front door neighbor, who came to desperately inform me that my father had fallen off his roof while attempting to do him a favor. After seeing my father laying on the concrete unable to move, I awaited the ambulance I had called and attempted to comfort him but he insisted that I head to work because we couldn't afford a missed a shift.

I grew up in a predominately low income Hispanic neighborhood, and my father is a political exile who used to cut grass for a living. (I'm not Mexican although I know you're probably thinking it. LOL.)

Would this work? Thanks in advance.

kevgogators wrote:Hey everyone,

Relatively new to this TLS game. I was just beginning to formulate ideas for my PS and came across one that will perhaps work, but I'd appreciate input on whether it is appropriate or not.

I was considering writing about the day that my father became handicapped. I was preparing for my first day at a different branch after receiving a big promotion to supervisor when I heard aggressive knocking on my door. It was my elderly front door neighbor, who came to desperately inform me that my father had fallen off his roof while attempting to do him a favor. After seeing my father laying on the concrete unable to move, I awaited the ambulance I had called and attempted to comfort him but he insisted that I head to work because we couldn't afford a missed a shift.

I grew up in a predominately low income Hispanic neighborhood, and my father is a political exile who used to cut grass for a living. (I'm not Mexican although I know you're probably thinking it. LOL.)

Would this work? Thanks in advance.

This PS might turn out to be more about your father than you. And if you try to make it more about yourself you might have a hard time not coming off as self-absorbed.

Of course, you might be able to pull it off so only a draft will tell.

kevgogators wrote:This PS might turn out to be more about your father than you. And if you try to make it more about yourself you might have a hard time not coming off as self-absorbed.

Of course, you might be able to pull it off so only a draft will tell.

I feared this as well. My intentions are to write about that day from my perspective and focus on my emotional state but you're right, a draft is necessary. Thanks for the input.

I don't know how helpful this is, but I wrote my undergraduate essay about a family member's developmental disability and how it changed my personal outlook. I think it can be a very effective essay (obviously) if handled appropriately. You definitely need to find that balance between acknowledging everything your father has gone through, but also keeping the focus tight on your own growth.

Also, I would just add as a caveat make sure to keep it positive. I remember my first draft way back when was actually super depressing, until a mentor quite rightly reminded me that no admissions committee wants to read two pages of misery and suffering. Acknowledge that, but turn it all into some sort of positive message about yourself.

But go for it! Speaking personally, I'm sure you've learned quite a bit from supporting your father, and from his resilience throughout this process. That can only reflect well upon you and demonstrate that you can take what comes.