Top Law Schools

How do you prepare for success? For me, it starts in my head. First, I have an idea, my idea turns into thoughts and well, you know rest, thoughts become actions. I think, breathe, and discuss attending law school almost every day; it’s like my baby. In no way am I implying that I am an expert on how to be successful but I do believe I am on the right track. When I set my mind to do something I let nothing, no one, or any circumstance interfere. Easy doesn’t work for me and mediocre is never an option. I am a diligent, genuine, optimistic, dependable, self-motivated individual. I thrive off of challenges and a little competition never hurt either. I believe without a shadow of a doubt David A. Clarke School of Law will be the best school for me to showcase my skills.

Besides buying shoes, I have never been so sure about wanting to attend David A. Clarke School of Law which brings me to my second step toward my success, action. Actions are what separates the weak from the strong, and the real from the fake. Your law school is for the real and the strong future attorneys, lobbyists, senators, or even the future president. What better place to attend law school other than in DC, our nation’s capital where there are a plethora of opportunities? As a native of one of the most diverse cities in the world, Chicago, and alumni of one of the most influential liberal art schools in the country, Spelman College, I was elated that David A. Clarke School of Law was ranked the #1 most diverse law school in the U.S. (National Jurist, 2012) and also ranked 6th for most liberal students (Princeton Review, 2013). Seems like a match made in heaven!

My eleven year old cousin Shelly, who think she knows everything expressed that she wanted to be like me when she grows up. Why me? She could have told me she wanted to be Oprah, Michelle Obama, or Beyonce! I’ll never forget the morning my older brother Glenn drove me to my LSAT test center and before I got out of the car he said, “No matter what happens, I am very proud of you. I may be the big brother but you’ve shown me that no dream is too big if you have what it takes. I appreciate you and I’m counting on you to live your dream.” There’s nothing more rewarding than inspiring someone and not just any one but a loved one. So, not only am I pursuing my goals for self-gratification but for Shelly and Glenn.

My GPA and LSAT do not define me as a candidate for law school. I’ve overcome an extended period of unemployment and due to financial circumstances moved 4 times in the past year. However, I never lost sight of my goal, applying to law school. My ambition and determination sets me a part from the rest. I may not have the highest numbers but hard work and dedication beats talent any day.

How do you know when you’re successful? Is it because of the neighborhood you live in, the car that you drive, or the friends that you have? As I stated earlier, I am no expert on how to become successful. I have tried and failed at many things but one thing I have not failed at is trying. I am successful simply because I am chasing my dreams. I am successful because I’ve inspired Shelly and Glenn. I believe I am on the right path, the right path to my success.

Here's the problem with your entire PS - you "tell" rather than "show". You say how dedicated, determined, and motivated you are...and then you keep saying it, but you don't provide any examples.

The other problems are:
1) I learned nothing about you in this PS;
2) Don't tell the school how awesome it is...it does nothing to help you. This PS isn't about the law school you want to go to, it should be about you;
3) You need to pick a theme or personal anecdote and stick to it. For example, you said "When I set my mind to do something I let nothing, no one, or any circumstance interfere." You could possibly write an entire PS based on this statement, but you need to have a story that proves your statement. Or you can write an entire PS about this other statement you made: " I’ve overcome an extended period of unemployment and due to financial circumstances moved 4 times in the past year." - if you tell this story, you can actually "show" how you are dedicated, determined, and motivated...you can show that when obstacles are in your way, you power through and remain positive...these are examples of attributes that law schools seek in an applicant. Simply telling the law school that you have these attributes doesn't help you at all, because everyone can say these things, but not everyone has a story to prove it. You need a story.

oshberg28 wrote:Here's the problem with your entire PS - you "tell" rather than "show". You say how dedicated, determined, and motivated you are...and then you keep saying it, but you don't provide any examples.

The other problems are:
1) I learned nothing about you in this PS;
2) Don't tell the school how awesome it is...it does nothing to help you. This PS isn't about the law school you want to go to, it should be about you;
3) You need to pick a theme or personal anecdote and stick to it. For example, you said "When I set my mind to do something I let nothing, no one, or any circumstance interfere." You could possibly write an entire PS based on this statement, but you need to have a story that proves your statement. Or you can write an entire PS about this other statement you made: " I’ve overcome an extended period of unemployment and due to financial circumstances moved 4 times in the past year." - if you tell this story, you can actually "show" how you are dedicated, determined, and motivated...you can show that when obstacles are in your way, you power through and remain positive...these are examples of attributes that law schools seek in an applicant. Simply telling the law school that you have these attributes doesn't help you at all, because everyone can say these things, but not everyone has a story to prove it. You need a story.

Thanks for the CONSTRUCTIVE feedback! I really appreciate it